It was the last thing I saw, her eyes, her eyes were the last thing I could keep in my memory before that door was closed, and I was alone with two strange women, I know I shouldn't be afraid of them, but I couldn't, my whole life I have learned to feel this way about anyone, especially after an aggression, so many people hurt me while I was growing up that it was too hard to trust to be alone in some closed room, when I was alone in life this fear was relieving itself, but apparently I still had remnants inside me, and so I tried to focus my mind on those eyes. - Miss, my name is Silvia, I know that this moment can be difficult, but don't worry, we won't force you into anything, but know that we need to take some pictures of the bruises to leave on record. - The woman in the white lab coat, blonde, looked like the doctor in the hospital, so I thought it was the same, she calmly explained what should be done, I took a deep breath uncomfortable, I had never shown my body to another per
"Please... stop! Please! Think of something different, Ayanne! Please think of something different, it will be okay. I tried to focus my thoughts on something else, but nothing came to mind even if I tried hard nothing good, just the repeated scenes from my childhood, just every sensation of pain I felt from every cut and burn." - Those scars, you have a long time, right? - The policewoman asked, I agreed with a groan as I shook my head, sobbing as my tears wet my face. - How long? - She asked again. "Why? Because you keep going, it's obvious you have nothing to do with that man, please stop looking, please. I begged, not even able to form a word. - All right, it's over now. - The woman whispered, and I automatically put my hand on the opening and pulled it over my back, I felt footsteps behind me, and in an instinct I moved away. - NO! - I screamed, scared, crying desperately, cringing in the corner of the wall on the floor, those images came back in my mind, that man beating me
It was hard, getting out of Ethan's arms was extremely hard, even if it was just to change the clothes I was wearing, but I knew he couldn't do that, and I didn't want to be alone, like a frightened child, but I knew I could do it without him actually seeing me change, anyway, I didn't want to be alone, I knew if I did, the monsters would come back, when that kiss was over, I didn't know exactly what to say, but they weren't my concern at that moment, and I was thankful that Ethan didn't ask me anything, and just asked me to get up and change. - You're not really going out, are you? - I asked softly as the man turned his back to me. - I swear I'm not going out, I'll be here with my back to you and my eyes closed. - And that's what he did, I saw him raise his hands to his eyes and keep them there, first I took my pants and put them underneath the strange dress they gave me, and then I took the sleeves off the clothes and left them over my body making sure that no piece of my back show
After a while we had arrived in front of his house, as soon as the car stopped, and he opened his door I followed him on the same side, he helped me out and then closed the door after thanking the man and paying for the ride, I raised my head again and saw my house, it looked normal, but the feeling I had that inside I would find a big surprise that a man would be inside, that door would not hold, but nothing, it was no longer safe in there, the house I fought so hard to acquire was where I completely drowned. "Why? Why did these things have to happen to me? Did I deserve all this? Did I do something wrong? But nothing came to mind, no sin, no criminal act, no insult to the elders, even though I suffered so much I never disrespected anyone, I was just born." "But why that? Because I was simply born? Maybe it was, maybe that was the answer." - I'll change your doors, I'll put new ones in place. - I heard Ethan's voice, for a moment I had forgotten that the man was still there, and I
That moment, that moment was a mixture of emotions, I was anxious, worried, confused and happy when I felt her lips on mine, I was happy, it was the first time I had ever kissed someone, and I was even happier that it was that woman, but at the same time I was confused, I didn't know what to do, I felt Ayanne's tears on my face, mixing in that kiss, it was as if it was her salvation and my doom, my heart was so fast when I rushed into that room, my brain only thought of one thing, if she was okay, when I heard her screams my chest tightened, and when I saw her tears my heart bled, she was helpless, she was helpless against her own fears, and I didn't know how I could help her, but inside of me I knew one thing, that I should be there, by her side, even if it was only to hold her, even if it was only to cry beside her, I should be there. The woman smiling beautifully beside me, who is washing the vegetables so calmly, doesn't even look like the same woman who was writhing and writhing
- Ha! Ha! Ha! I think you're right, you should teach him to pick his own food! - I joined in on his joke as I bent down and opened the cupboard, picked up his pot and put the right amount in the measuring cup. - Come on, boy, let's eat together then. - I placed the pot next to the table between Ayanne's chair and mine, which was at the far end, and as soon as the woman was comfortably seated I went back to the kitchen to get a jug of water from the refrigerator. - Need some help? - I heard her ask. - No, it's okay, you can continue there, I just forgot the water. - I lifted the jug, showing it to her, and then picked up the condiments on the sink and carried them to the table. - There, now we can eat peacefully. - I said as I filled her glass and then mine. - Thank you. - The woman thanked me with a shy smile. - You've been saying that word a lot lately. - I joked with the woman, who quickly turned red. - Eh... Eh, sorry. - She replied, embarrassed. - That word is also coming o
Ethan had left to put the old door on the outside, at that moment I was crouched down in front of my room, the view I had from there was relatively simple, it was just an ordinary room, well lit with ambient light coming in through the large window that served as a very quiet place to read a book or drink a cup of coffee while letting the sun warm your body or just watch the rain fall on a cold day with a mug of hot chocolate, those were good feelings, all very happy feelings if it was anyone else in my place, but not for me, when I stood there alone I felt uncomfortable, I was feeling insecure in my own home, in my own room. My heart was racing faster and faster, every second I was there alone, but that was my home, I had fought so hard to get my own home, I had finally got a place to call my own, the feeling I felt the first time I entered here, I could still feel it, I could feel the happiness that filled my chest to overflowing, those four walls were mine, I spent every penny to b
- Yes? His eyes were bright, his face that seemed to hate everything around him, actually showed affection and concern, but no one but me was seeing that, I was lucky, I could see him with that look that at that moment was only for me. - I... I really like you. - I don't know where I got the courage, I don't know if he felt the same way or if he was just doing it because he considered it a duty between friends or neighbors, but I had to speak up, I really had to get it out there, after all, he needed to know. Ethan looked at me for a few seconds without reaction, he didn't expect this, I know he didn't, in fact, it was crazy, we didn't know anything about each other's lives, I didn't even know about his parents, if they were still alive, but it didn't matter, from here on I would have the confidence to say what I am feeling, to scream when I need to, to defend myself when there is a danger. - You-are you serious? - His next reaction was one of incredulity, which made me smile wider.