SADIE
FOUR HOURS LATER.
It always, like it always has to rain this day of every year. And I in all honesty, I have never minded but tonight’s feels like I am being punished for coming too late. If this heavy downpour is my punishment, it is not enough.
No it is not. I should be struck by thunder or something more. I got carried away by my loss today. Him causing a raise to my heart, adrenaline aside. Not only is he the first person I failed to kill, but he made me feel something I hate to admit.
“I brought flowers. I am sorry.” I whisper-cry as I kneel on the wet grass.
Placing the flower on her name engraved on the stone, I pull the weeds around her grave with my hands.
“I wish I was the one six feet under and not you.” I mutter as I continue plucking out the weeds.
“Not only did I almost commit the gravest sin by forgetting to come here, I lost today. I failed to kill the Alpha guy. I do not know why he is being called an alpha. He is just some ordinary man. I could snap his fuck.ing neck, stab or burry my bullet in either his skull or aim perfectly at his heart. But I do not know where I went wrong. Maybe it was because I hesitated for the first time ever in six month – my bad. I am being selfish again. I came here to see you and I am talking about the reason I almost could not see you.
Well, more reports… remember the journal you bought for me a week before everything? It is here. I write everyday about matters I would have loved to share with you and gotten your advice on. Just because writing it feels like I am talking directly to you but without answers.
You taught me that those above see all, so you must have seen me while I was writing this for you. Still, I will read it out.” I say as I stand back.
Taking out the plain purple journal, I open it to the bookmarked page and glace at her name engraved on the stone once more before parting my lips to begin reading;
Dear Sister Esther,
Hi!
Today makes it ten years since I heard you laugh, talk, or argue with dad. I have not been the same without you. You know the movie walking dead? I know you do. We watched season one together. While the movie focused on the zombies after either being beaten or taken by death, I died the moment I stepped into the pool of your blood. I have become a walking dead too. When they see me, they think I am alive, but I am dead.
My happiness and humanity drained at that very moment. If wishes could bring back the dead, you would be here. And if I could die in your stead I would. I know killing others would not bring you back, but at least I would do it for you. They said you killed yourself but I know you never had it in you to do so. You loved me and at least for me you would do no such thing as killing yourself.
I know you wanted me to grow up and one day find the one for me. I know you wanted what is best for me. I know you and Dad never saw eye to eye but you both agreed on only one thing and that was me never following this path I am following.
As much as you hate this, I know you will be proud of me. I got too emotional writing this, so I will stop here for now...
Trailing off as fireflies begin to light up everywhere, I wipe my tears and smile.
“I never knew this letter would make you happy. Thank you for showing up.” I whisper.
Folding the paper, I find a stone with the aid of my phone’s flashlight and the fireflies. I place the paper on her grave and hide it with a stone.
“Since you are here, maybe I should tell you about today? You heard when I said it the first time, but you know me well. When I want to tell a story again, I start from the beginning. So, here we go; I woke up on the wrong side of the bed today,” I pause to chuckle dryly.
“I always wake up on the wrong side of the bed. Always. But today, I woke up on the worst side. I woke up to a pounding head, and to make matters worse. The task I had accepted to kill an ex for an ex failed. Whenever the news reporters wanted to report my kills, they called me a shadow, sometimes they called me invisible. I am fast. I do my job well. For some reason I failed and it is really fuc.king with my mind. I cannot seem to think straight. All I am thinking about is how he challenged me. He frea.king pinned me against the wall with a knife to my carotid artery… he was going to kill me before I did.
I take it as an insult to my perfection. He thought he was sleek, he has only made matters worse for himself. I do not accept such insult. So either of us has to die. It is either I kill him or he kills me. I hate him. I hate him so much, I cannot seem to explain. The more I talk about it, the more I want him dead. This time, I will not make use of a weapon, I will not touch him but I will make sure he begs for death even before death comes for him. I stand in front of your grave to swear.” I add and I feel my heart beat faster than usual.
Moving my hand over my chest, I rub it to suit it and bow in respect, before backing away. I walk back to my car without looking back like I usually do when leaving. Settling in, I rest my head on the steering wheel as my phone lights up from the middle console. Indicating that I have an incoming call.
“This is the third time you have failed to show up after a proper plan.” Matt says as I leave the phone on speaker while I drive.
“Are you disappointed?” I ask as I look back briefly to reverse.
“No. I know I mean nothing to you. I know this thing between us is nothing to you. I know it is hard for you to feel for me or any other man, but I am trying to make you see it is more than the se.x….”
“Thing? We have a thing going on between us? I had no idea.” I cut him off.
“Sadie…”
“It is off. Whatever ‘thing’ you are thinking of is over. Just because I fuck.ed you twice does not mean you are special or we have a thing. It is called protecting myself. I was bothered with going through the process of running medical tests for infections and repeating the whole story of how it is going to be a one-time thing. Matt, it was convenient for you.” I tell him.
“You say really harsh words. That would make a man never fall in love again or trust another woman, but even if it is just one more time. Just once more. Sadie, please.”
“Get yourself a girl after this.” I respond.
“I love you.” He says and I terminate the call, as I turn to swap routes.
SADIE.Love?The most misused word. A word that invokes unnecessary bondage and responsibility. Might be hypocritical of me to say it since my drive to every successful kill and being the best agent in the organization is the LOVE I have for my sister. What is the very point of getting into something more when nothing lasts forever? Why waste so much time falling in love and trying to please a partner in the name of love? Why are people willing to get married with the intention of starting a family? Children are great, but why bring them into chaos and also create a weakness for one’s self? Say they were unbreakable before, now with just a mere threat to their lives the parents switch to more than a broken glass.“Get out.” I say as calmly as I can let out, my head is currently like it is about to split apart. “Sadie, please.” Matt pleads.“Get out.” I can feel myself twitching from my irritation, but one more credit to the list of too many things I can do is control.“You are one
THIRD PERSON’S POINT OF VIEW. Alpha Emmett sits in his study with his business partners who are also his Beta and Gamma respectively as he requested their presence. His anger, less prominent than it had been initially after he felt deceived. He is a man of peace. A man who hates to be lied to. A man who loves his people and respects them as much as he can because no one can beat the respect the members of the pack have for him. “Who could have sent her?” Cullen, his best friend asks as he paces back and forth continuously. “Should the question be who sent her or why Emmett let her go? He could have easily killed her right from the moment he saw her and Shell did not bark.” Liam, the Gamma replies. The latter question makes Emmett groan internally, he knew he kind of messed up but he has no regret whatsoever that he did not kill her. He knows he will be lying to himself if he says he never wants to see her again. He in fact wants her at this event. “Was she that beautiful? Were her
SADIE. The violin play of an emotional baroque plays as people discuss quietly amongst each other. Some smile, and many keep on stoic expressions while they speak. The man who I am here for seems to be carried away by the attention he is giving to the very beautiful woman dressed in a purple cocktail dress, while I sip the few drops of red wine in my glass. “You love the music, right? I saw the way you shut your eyes while sipping the wine,” a voice says, forcing my gaze to shift from the Alpha. “You should see right ahead,” I say loud enough for just him to hear as I exchange my empty glass with a new one on the waiter’s tray. “I cannot see anyone else but you,” he pesters, causing me to hiss. I could let him follow me stupidly then knock him out in the hallway or I could just end him. “What is your name? I have never seen you around,” he continues. “No,” I get distracted by Emmett’s conversation with a man in a tuxedo whose smile is very contagious. “Anyone who attends this e
SADIE.I do not need to open my eyes or wiggle my numb hands to know what this is. It is cold, way too cold probable around a degree Celsius or even less. I would wear a warm jacket and even a hat and gloves, take that I also feel the wind brushing past my goosebump-ed skin.I can tell where I am, I have tortured people in basements before and aunt Kitra trained me in my father’s basement. If this place does not give a basement even though I am yet to confirm, the crack sounds made from a burning wood to keep this place warm enough to some extent is enough to out what the place is.I will not give him what he expects. Not a whimper, not even a struggle with the zip ties chaffing raw into my wrist as I breathe in and out. What I know is until I avenge Esther, I cannot die. His death has been paid for and I will end up killing him. Moreso now, that he has marked me weak even in my own eyes by being able to have me strapped against a metal ch
EMMETT. Her waist length hair and her eyes as she zeros them on mine without a single fear that I know what she did before. Her confidence turns me on in many different ways. Her purple cocktail dress and the movement of a throat as she gulps down the rest of the wine in her glass, twitches something in my heart. I would not be surprised if she has managed to poison the drinks or strapped a holster to her thigh right where I want my hand as she straddles me. “You love the music, right? I saw the way you shut your eyes while sipping the wine.” I overhear one of the guests say as his hand forces itself to remain on his body and not on her. I saw her shut eyes too. It only increased my need to see her shut her eyes despite warning her to keep them open. She is one livid one and I very much would love to tame her. To flip her cold eyes into something that stares at me with want and love. “You should see right ahead.” Her response causes my lip to move up slightly in a smirk as I raise
SADIEI know better than to expect my father to release his secret search party to find me. I have disappeared after missions before so maybe he thinks I have disappeared again. Hoffman’s threatening letters would let him know I failed the mission again.I failed the mission, AGAIN!Shit. My head hurts. My body aches me so bad and my eyes are not responding to my will to open them. My lips are also not parting for me to speak and my fingers are unable to wiggle even for a sign of consciousness. I am fucked.They fell to the ground without me touching them. I fell unconscious too—I will blame it on the hit across my face. That hit was painful, I will admit just to you.I am in so much pain but I know better than to seek relief. I have inflicted pains on families in less than six months. I know better than to pray to anything or anyone. Sinners get forgiven. I am way past a sinner and I do not seek repentance. I want to p
SADIE. I just hope I am not slowly slipping into a coma. I can wiggle my fingers now, but not fully. In fact, I have only been able to wiggle the fingers once after he asked me to marry him. The pain that moves from my head to the back of my neck as his words begin to make more impact as it reiterates in my ears, is one enough to paralyze me further. Revenge? Yes. Marriage for revenge? No. I hate love so much. I have read books. I have seen movies even though I barely get the time to see any or read any recently, but it still does not clear what is already known. When two people of contrasting genders begin to share a space, they become obsessed with each other. They begin to lie to themselves as an individual. One would say, it is only normal to care about the person living on the same roof. They will both not know when they begin to feel jealousy when another person who may likely be a love interest approaches the other person. How else does someone get so attached to someone?
SADIE. I do not know where to start from. For the first time in a while, I am actually confused. I know for a certain that there is an eighty percent chance that every single word, the Alpha—I mean Emmett. Everything he said will be right if they are not right already. I am not someone to be swayed easily or tossed around. Before I jump into this conclusion, I will most definitely give it my all to hear my father and aunt Kitra spill nothing but the truth to me. I sincerely hope they will not tell even a lie. I trust them so much and I do not trust myself on how I will take it if they betray my trust. They are the only people I have ever trusted after Esther. For now, I feel nothing but immerse pain in every part of my body. Every single part, not excluding the one you might be thinking about. My fingers are shaking involuntarily and my toes are curling. My normally pale skin looks paler and if I were to judge if it were not I in this position, I will most definitely say I look dead