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BLUE MOON 106
*** I wander the woods for a while before walking back to the compound alone, I don’t try to go after Zayne, I won’t find him, I didn’t mean to challenge or disobey him, it was never my intention to undermine his authority, it just happened. I respect him too much for that. The house is quiet when I step in shutting the door quietly behind me. Not even a sound from the kitchen, I make my way slowly up the stairs, I don’t want to be in our bedroom right now so I head to the den, under the table are board games I’ve played with Oliver and the guys more times that I can remember. I rub down my face, wondering what now? Pushing up the sleeves of my hoodie, I slip my hands into the front pocket, I frowned thoughtfully then slipped my right finger out. What is-“How did this get here?” I flip the folded piece of paper through my fingers. What the hell? I turn the strange object in my hand slowly, it looks to be folded into a children’s plane. “How strange” I try to think how this could
BLUE MOON 107
During the day, I lay on the bed with my eyes open, I don’t see anything, or feel anything, my mind, blank. Zayne lets me wallow in misery as long as I eat, I force myself to swallow the food else he doesn’t leave. I can’t think, I can’t sleep, I’m too scared to close my eyes, the guilt eats at my core draining every last bit of strength I have until I pass out and that’s when the nightmares come, it taunts me so darkly, so vivid. I wake up, screams at the back of my throat, half expecting to see the world painted red with blood. I hear my parents calling my name, asking me why. And I can’t face them, so I run. Not even being with Zayne prevents the nightmares. I don’t try to shield myself from them, I deserve it, this is my just punishment. So, each night, Zayne smooths my hair, damp with sweat and tears, he tells me it wasn’t my fault, I didn’t ask the puppet master to come after me. I tell him I did that by existing, that I should have been there. He tells me I wouldn’t have bee
BLUE MOON 108
*** Running into Zayne cooled some of my rage but I’m determined. A few people greet me with smiles when they see me at practice, Oliver hugs me tightly but he doesn’t say anything or ask any questions, his eyes look knowing though, he must know something, maybe not everything but something. “I’m fine Oliver”, I say, trying to breathe. “I know that now” he presses a quick peck to my lips then jumps away. I smile at his antics, knowing it is just his way of showing affection. Everyone divides into pairs and begins to train. “Want to go wolf?” “Er… I don’t know about that” I look around, searching for Naya, Colin stans at the side, watching, I need the kind of training I can only get from her, she’s vicious and never pulls her punches. And I need to fight without holding back. “Where is Naya?” “Funny enough she stopped coming around when you did” he clicked his tong playfully at me, “We don’t need much hands on training anymore” I nod. Sometimes I can’t believe how far we’ve co
BLUE MOON 109
I used to love Saturdays, it means a much needed break from the week of vigorous training, I'm hating it for that exact reason right now. It means I have nothing to pour my frustrations into as I have the past two days, it’s the only thing that makes me feel some kind of peace these days, it means I’m doing something, sharpening my skills like a blade for when we find them. Pushing up the sleeves of my red thermal, I look to the right and freeze, blind panic floods me, and I don’t think, I just duck behind the nearest tree, flattening myself against the hard bark, holding my breath. My eyes clenched shut as my heart almost beats out of my chest. A soft laugh sounds followed by a breathy voice. The footfalls draw closer and a moment later begins to fade as the girls stroll past me. My head pressed back against the tree, I swallow a sob, forcing my eyes to open finally step out from behind the tree and watch as Lily, Mile, and Winnie walk, laughing as they whisper amongst themselve
BLUE MOON 110
“When it comes to your protection?” he turns to me fully “When it comes down to keeping you here, safe and mine? I can and I will” “You just can’t keep things like this from me, it’s about me and I deserve a choice!” so many things have been taking form me, the ability to choose my fate, it’s the only thing I have and I’ll never allow anyone take that from me. “Is it a choice you would have accepted?” “Not, it’s not about that-“ “Then no, you do not need to know” I glare at him, I try to contain my emotions, I really do but the more I think about it, the more annoyed I get and he is just so unapologetic about it. “I thought we were supposed to be a team?” I can’t hide the hurt in my voice as I turn away from him, Zayne catches my arm “Where are you going?” With a sharp tug, I pull from his grip. “Away from you!” before I do or say something I can take back. I make to stepside him but he catches me again, pulling me into him my back to his front “Let me go,” His heart beats stea
BLUE MOON 111
If I thought my relationship with Zayne was strained days ago after Alpha Colton’s challenge, then I’m not sure what to call it at the moment, we're not even talking, at least I’m not talking to him, and he’s not tried to talk to me either. Yes, he gives me any updates they have on the investigation, but he doesn’t join me for meals, I’ve barely even seen him the past two days, yes, he still comes to me at night and we fuck, using our bodies to talk each other, saying things we wished we would say out loud: I’m so mad at you but I want you so much, I’m sorry, forgive me? I’m not quite sure which of us is trying to say that last one though, me? Him? Both of us? It feels wrong thinking about this at the moment, I should be consumed with thoughts of trying to figure out the puppet master dead set on taking or destroying me. But alas the brain has a mind of its own. I just don’t know where I stand with him, I cannot accept that he keeps so much from me, the thought hurts, he cares abou
BLUE MOON 112
I can’t fight them all. I blink and bitter tears roll down my cheek. “What are you waiting for? Shoot her!” the third hunter growls at the male aiming the bow at me, arrow already notched, but he doesn’t seem to be hearing, his wide hazel eyes locked with mine, frozen it’s so easy to slip through his mental shield and I feel him, he’s shocked, scared, he doesn’t want to be here. Well then, he shouldn’t have come. I’ve always practiced shielding myself from others, so I’m not constantly overwhelmed by their emotions. The words slip through the wind, and I hear Nana’s voice. An empath is deadly. You can influence the emotions of others and vice versa. The only thing I’m capable of feeling right now is fear, grabbing hold of the fear in my heart I just push it onto him. He chokes and grabs unto his head, the bow falling to the ground. My free hand curls into a fist at my side as I shove more fear unto his mind, He cries out a moment later startling the other two. “What are you
BLUE MOON 113
Zayne is sitting on the bed when I step out of the bathroom, my eyes hurt from crying. At how close I’d come to getting myself and Oliver killed, at scaring Zayne so badly. He thought he was going to find me broken, bleeding, or dead. A ring of silver appears in his eyes, he must be still pissed, and rightly so. “Are you hurt?” Tightening the knot on my towel at the side, I shake my head. His eyes remain glued to my forehead where I know there is a dark bruise from when I fell. Trailing to the little cut on my lip from where I got hit by one of the hunters. “Where else?” darkness coats the words. “Blow to the back of my head” I confess. His fist clenched, his jaw tightening in restrained anger. “It doesn’t hurt” “They died too quickly, I would have dragged it out for weeks” his voice is low. My hands fondle my towel once more eyes studying the hardwood floors, I try not to cry. “Come here” I blink back the tears and run to him. Climbing into his lap, I bury my face into his
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