Chapter Two

Slowly, I turn.

Miles Carter stands there.

I have imagined, many times, what he would look like now, but my own fantasies can't even live up to the real deal. His ashy, blond hair is messy as usual. He always has the look that he has just rolled out of bed. His strong, angular jaw had widened since he was 16 and he now has stubble. I hate that he has somehow gotten more attractive since leaving. He still possesses the power to turn my insides into liquid, with just one look.

I realise now that I have been standing here, gaping at him, wordlessly.

"It's been a long time," he eventually says, leaning back onto his locker.

My eyes dip over what he is wearing. He has a pair of dark-washed jeans on and a black, leather jacket over the white, polo shirt. I almost faint when it clicks that white polo shirt was our school uniform.

He has grown taller and his shoulders broader now. He looks older than most his age, his eyes holding a dark, tortured look that they didn't have before.

"Issy?" he repeats softly.

"What the hell are you doing back here?" I snap, finally gaining my voice.

He blinks, a little taken back. "I came back here, for you."

I open my mouth to retort but nothing comes out.

Miles Carter said what now?

Me...? Did he just...?

"You are un-fucking-believable!" I growl, stomping up to him. "Do you have any idea what you put me and my family through?"

He doesn't move from his position as he stands there, staring at me. It annoys me that my curse - something I would have never said when I was 16 - didn't faze him. I move closer and he doesn't flinch. I hate that he still gets under my skin.

"Of course I do, but you guys cut me out of your life pretty damn quick," he snaps back, his tone holding about the same amount of anger as mine.

I feel my left eye twitch and my cheeks warm as I glare at him. "Yeah, why do you think that is? It's your fault my dad is dead."

His lips part and I feel relief. There. That was a reaction.

I take a step back when I realise what I just said, guilt flooding my body like a tsunami. I gulp, as something flashes across his eyes.

"Good to know you still hate me as much as I hate myself," is all he says, before pushing himself off the locker and striding away from me.

My legs give way and I fall onto the lockers beside me, shaking. I press my forehead against the cold metal, feeling disorientated.

Miles Carter is here. At my school. In my life.

I can only imagine that Finn is going to take this almost as well as I did.

***

As I re-enter class, a few people gave me weird looks.

It must seem strange I took so long.

"Welcome back, Miss Collins," Mr Edgington drawls. "Thought you got lost."

A few people snicker and I would usually roll my eyes or say something back, but I am way too shaken.

Mr Edgington meets my eyes and realises something is wrong. I must look as bad as I feel. I can feel my body trembling. He walks over to me, frowning.

"Isobel, are you alright?"

Tears burn in my eyes and I shake my head.

"I think..." I gasp out. "I'm about to..." Another gasp. "Have a panic attack."

I have had a couple of panic attacks in my life, so now, I know when one is coming.

I shouldn't have come back to class, but it didn't really hit me until I felt the eyes of my peers on me.

Samara shot up from her chair, grabbing our stuff and hastily moving towards me.

"I got this," she says to Mr Edginton, dragging me out of the room.

Each breath feels like a sharp, jabbing pain each time I inhale. We make it to the girl's bathroom, where Samara drops our books onto the tiled floor. I can feel my cheeks burning. I strip my coat off, tugging at the collar of my school shirt.

"I - can't - breathe," I rasp, clawing at my throat.

Samara grabs me again, her fingers biting into my shoulders. The last time I had a panic attack, Ashley had been the one to help me. She showed Samara what to do, in case it ever happened again.

"Hey," she says softly, staring intently into my eyes. "You're okay. Just try and relax. Focus on your breathing. Deep inhale, then exhale, okay?"

I nod weakly, staring into her eyes, trying to calm my breathing.

That didn't work. On to option two.

I shake my head, stepping back, feeling light-headed. If I don't gain control of my breathing, I am going to faint, as I have before.

"How many fingers am I holding up?" she asks. "Let's count together."

She holds up two fingers.

"Two," I choke out.

She holds up another.

"Three." It is a little easier to talk this time.

She continues and by the time we get to ten, I can feel my heartbeat slowing. I finally take in a deep breath, feeling dizzy. I grip the bathroom sink, my knees knocking together.

"What the hell caused that kind of panic attack?" she exclaims once I return to semi-normal. "Jesus, you scared the hell out of me."

Thinking about Miles being in the same building as me right now, almost makes me have another one. I squeeze my eyes closed as I let out a big breath.

"Miles Carter is back."

"Oh fuck."

"Exactly my reaction."

"We need to get to Finn. Like right now."

Suddenly, there is loud shouting and I hear a deafening bang.

We exchange a panicked look.

"Looks like it's too late..."

***

I rush into the hallway, to see everyone else has done the same. It must be class change over.

Miles is on the floor and Finn is over the top of him, shouting.

"What the hell are you doing here?" he screams.

"Finn, come on," Miles said calmly, looking up at him. Blood is trickling from the corner of his mouth, down to his chin. "I'm your best friend."

"You were." Finn's tone is so icy, it feels like the temperature around us just dropped a few degrees.

Everyone has gathered in a semi-circle, trying to get a good look at what was going on.

"I'm going to kick your ass," Finn threatens, lunging for him again.

I begin running, pushing people out of the way. I grip Finn's jacket, reefing him back with all my strength. As he wasn't expecting it, he stumbles back and we both end up on our butts.

"Ow," I mutter, rubbing my backside.

Finn let out an exasperated sigh. "Is, did you not see I was about to kick some serious ass?"

"I did," I told him, getting to my feet and pulling him up with me. "But if you get suspended again, you won't get to be Captain anymore."

He shrugs, sending a fiery look over my shoulder. "Would be worth it."

"Trust me, he's not," I tell him, glancing down at Miles.

Miles meets my eyes and I feel my resolve crumble. He looks so helpless. Looking away, I grab Finn's hand, even though his knuckles were bleeding, and tug him after me. The crowd around us are silent as we walked through them.

Once we are outside and breathing in the fresh air, I felt Finn relax beside me.

"Fuck," he groans, grabbing a fistful of his hair. "If you hadn't been there, I would have lost it."

"I know." I agree. "Always thinking with either your fists or your dick."

"Hey!"

"It's true," I point out with a shrug. "Are you okay?"

"No. Are you?"

"No."

He blows out a breath, before coming over and wrapping his arms around me. I feel my body melt into him as I hug him back.

"He won't get to us again," Finn promises me.

"I hope not. He said..." I trail off, realising that I shouldn't have said anything. I mentally face-palm myself.

"What?" he asks stepping back, his eyes narrowing into slits. "What did he say?"

"He said he came back for me," I whisper.

"I'm going to fucking kill him," he growls turning and storming towards the school.

"Oh my God," I groan, running after my crazy brother. "Get back here, you moron."

I tug him back roughly, shaking my head.

"What did we just say? You would lose everything, yes?"

"If I lose you, then I have nothing."

"You won't lose me," I assure him, reaching out and touching his shoulder. "Besides, I'm seeing Bentley now. Kind of."

"I'll kick his ass, too."

"Finn!" I exclaim with an incredulous laugh. "You can't just beat up everyone!"

"I can try."

"I think the best thing to do, is ignore him. Miles is a troublemaker. He probably came back here, purposely to mess with us. If we act like he isn't here, he will get bored. I know it will be hard, but that's what we have to try and do. Got it?"

He let out a deep exhale through his nose. "Okay, I'll try. But the second you want me to punch his head in, I'm on it."

"Good to know," I laugh.

"What happened in History?" he asks suddenly. "Ryan said you were all shaky and left?"

"Yeah, I had a panic attack."

"What? You haven't had one of those in ages?"

"I ran into Miles outside of class. I guess I just wasn't mentally prepared to see him. I'm okay now, Samara helped me."

I saw the blaze return in Finn's eyes but he kept his cool. He ran a hand through his unruly hair, shaking his head.

"As soon as I step foot back in there, I'll have to go to the principal's office."

"Do you want me to come? You know I'm better at talking in situations like this."

"Nah," he says, shaking his head. "I should be okay. I don't want you anywhere near Miles and he'll be there."

"Try and be smart about it, okay? Just think, if you get suspended, then I'm vulnerable."

"I'll have my friends look out for you," he told me.

"Damn, I didn't think that through."

He cracks a lop-sided smile and I smile back, glad to see that he has returned to normal.

"I'll try to pull my head in," he promises.

"Good boy."

We walk back into school and as soon as we enter, the Vice Principal stands there, her arms folded, a stern expression on her face.

"Finn Collins, come with me."