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LUKA Some people feel like light. When you're on the very edge, being close to them made you feel like you had a sliver of hope left and you wouldn't drown. That's how saying close to Bella made me feel. I could forget for a while how messed up I was inside. I liked sleeping beside her. The first time we slept together in the same bed, she might have been drunk and I might have woken up with a huge boner but I really liked it. So I am really happy that we are recreating it tonight. We will be fine as long as I keep my hands to myself. Plus I needed her smart mouth and silly faces to keep my head busy and distract me from the physical pain. What happened at dinner this evening was the worst I've ever seen my father yet. He wasn't mad because I didn't pick his calls, I just let Bella believe that because she would pity me and let me into her bed. I sighed heavily as I adjusted in the unfamiliar sheets which smelt so much like her. I took in as much as I could with the c
BELLAThe only telltale signs that Luka was in my bed were the tiny whiffs of his smell on my sheet, the dent from where his head lay on the pillow and some blood spots which were from his wounds. If all these signs were not there I would have convinced myself that it was a dream, because when I got up he was gone. I slept well. I tried hard not to fall asleep because i didn't want to disturb him if I got a nightmare but when he started sleeping, and I couldn't see his face, all I had to do was lie in the darkness and listen to the rise and fall of his chest, it lulled me into a comfortable rhythm and peace with sleeping in the dark. I stretched out my hands to the now empty spot filled with longing. One of the few things I came to accept last night while waiting to fall asleep was that I like Luka. I like him a whole lot. I couldn't deny it anymore and all I have to do now is to make sure that I didn't fall in love with him. On the bright side, all I had left was six months to h
I stuck my head outside the window and put out my hand, waving it out. It felt good to feel the wind in my face, making my hair fly all over. The smell of the evening air was crisp and I needed it to do good for my senses. If possible, shock my heart back to pre Luka settings. Luka was content with the conversation fizzling out and as he focused on driving he increased the volume and we drove around in comfortable silence till he got to some apartment buildings. He parked and I looked around. The area was neat and well developed and it was in the heart of the town. The commute from school was a little longer but he had his own car, so that wasn't a factor. "It's a studio apartment," he offered. I nodded still trying to take the exterior in. It looked okay but it was going to be very expensive. "Can you afford this?" I asked worriedly. "Yes." "What if you get cut off?" "I have my own money." "Wow. Trust fund baby," I teased. He gave me a cocky smile, "I have my own money th
My eyes were burning.I had this ache between my eyes which could be because of how tired I was but I had no choice.After dinner, I went straight to study. I made notes in sticky papers from the document Luka made and tried to simplify things as much as I could before I placed it all over my dresser, where I constantly had to read or see them. Reading with his guide made things a little easier, it was just that I had a lot on my mind. Still I forced myself to stay there for three hours studying and wandering off then studying again. My phone was just on the dresser beside me. Luka always accused me of not treating my phone like a mobile device which could be carried, so I tried to make sure that it wasn't within arm's reach tonight. What did he want to call me about? What did we have to say? I wish we could go back sometime. To Master and Pet and the bullying. At least we didn't have to talk. I didn't have to see his scars, or sleep in the same bed with him. "Arghhhh!" I yelled
I don't want to open my eyes. If it was a dream I didn't want it to end. But all good things must come to an end and before I opened my eyes, I searched for him with my hands. If the lack of warmth didn't tell me anything the cold sheets did. He was gone again. I wasn't surprised this time but I knew this one was different from the last time and what happened last night wasn't a dream. I woke up feeling relaxed and light. All night I felt him cuddling up to me and I slept soundly. More than I've done in years honestly. I dragged myself up pushing my tangled hair away from my face and trying to get my bearings when I saw a written note on the bedside table.I'm sorry about last night. Let's pretend it never happened. - LukaWhatever high I was on came crashing down. He had probably touched me just because he felt I was horny not because he felt the same. If not why didn't he try to please himself too. This was Luka, he wasn't some virgin. He had been with others and it's not li
LUKA.She didn't want to go with me. I could see the internal battles as she thought about it, so when she made an excuse not to go I wasn't surprised.I could make her go with me and she would. I just didn't know if it was the right choice. So I forced a smile and made it seem like I was okay by her decision. She wanted to do the sensible thing of having space between us. I tried that route the whole of this week and I was committed to it before she came in bearing goodies with a shy smile in that dress.All week I've tortured myself with wanting to know more on how she tastes, how she will respond if I take things between us a notch higher and I couldn't help but stay away. When she finally left I sighed. This thing between us was becoming so confusing. I didn't do love and all that sappy shit but Bella deserved that. I watched her alot in class when she wasn't looking, and she was the reason why I was skipping the cafeteria often. Every time I saw her laugh at one of Jamie's stu
BELLA"Who is there mom?" I asked standing on the bottom of the stairs with my pencil behind my ears and my hands in the pocket of my shorts. My mom was still at the entrance of the door and I couldn't see who it was so I walked to the door and raised myself on my toes to see over her head but there was no one there. "Mom," I whispered again behind her and she jumped in fear. "Don't creep up on people! You know I have an issue with my blood pressure."I burst into laughter. You see my mom always used her supposed blood pressure to have us in line and behave. "What is it this time?"She cocked her head to the side, her brown hair which she cut into a Bob falling to the side before she said, "you know I could swear someone knocked this door, but when I came out to open it I saw someone running away in a very posh car speeding away. "Oh." "Do you think it's someone from Boston?" I asked, beginning to feel some of the tension. "No. It was a sports car." Sports car? That definitely
BELLASomething has changed. I don't need a soothsayer to tell me or Luka acknowledging it, but I know something has changed since that night. Luka has avoided me before but this was a discovery. It felt like I suddenly vanished off the face of the earth to him and his world moved on and I never existed in it. The next morning after I woke up, he was gone. I wasn't surprised that he was, but it was also the last time Luka and I were in the same space. It was like he made it his life mission to always be occupied with something or someone. He was almost never alone in school or had time to return any of my messages. Just like right now, he was smiling at something Maya said. He looked so caught up with her that for once I wanted to be that jealous bitch that told her that he was screwing with me all the while that he was with her. I burst into a hysterical laughter the moment the thought crystallised in my mind. Like she cares? Just because I was not okay with their arrangement