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72I couldn't sleep because of the fear I felt that night. Takot na takot ako na biglang bumalik ulit si Tito Alfredo. I want to call Maddix, but I'm afraid of Tito Alfredo's threat. The way he looked at me last night was so scary, as if if I didn't really follow what he wanted me to do, he would do something I wouldn't like.Ang sabi nito ay si mama ang pupuntahan niya kapag hindi ko siya sinunod. Napapikit ako at agad na tinwagan si Mama noong gabing iyon. I was so scared, and I can't even think straight.Kailangan niya ng pera, iyon lang naman siguro hindi ba? Nawala lahat sa kanya noong nakulong siya kaya paniguradong naghihirap siya ngayon at isa sa kailangan niya para magsimula ulit ay ang pera, pero nasaan ang anak niya? Asan si Kael? Napapikit ako at medyo hinawakan ang ulo dahil masakit pa ang ulo sa pagsabunot niya sa'kin. Pera lang ang gusto niya ngayon. Siguro naman hindi na niya ako guguluhin pagkatapos ko siyang bigyan ng pera. Isang milyon.Inasekaso ko agad kinabukasa
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73I don't know how long I slept, but I woke up when I smelled some smoke. I closed my eyes and sat down. I tried to stand up, but I couldn't because I realized that my feet were tied, as were my hands. Nasa likod ko ang dalawang kamay ko at parehong nakatali iyon. I bit my lower lip and started crying because I already didn't know what to do."Tito!" Hinanap ko sa paligid si Tito kahit na alam kpng paniguradong wala na siya.How can he do this? Ang sama-sama niya. He is really planning to burn me alive! At ang tanga mo, Aliyah! No! Aliyah, do something! Don't fucking just cry! I don't want to die like this. "Maddix," umiiyak na sambit ko habang sinasambit ang pangalan niya na alam kong malabong mapuntahan niya ako at iligtas. He is out of the country! It's just me! I needed to get out of here!I tried to remove the rope from my wrist while my tears continued to fall. but the tie is too tight. I also continued to cough as the fire and smoke grew bigger.I tried several times to remo
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74"Your baby is safe, Aliyah. Now, rest," Tito said that rason kaya nakahinga ako ng malalim. Napahawak ako sa dibdib ko at parang may tinik na nabunot sa lalamunan ko, pero uung luha ko ay ayaw pa rin tumigil."Safe na siya, pero mahina ang kapit niya. If you really don't want to lose a child again, huwag kang pasaway, Liyah. Rest and don't think anything other than the baby in your tummy," said Tito Peter gently but firmly.Napapikit ako dahil alam kong tama siya. Napahawak ako sa tiyan ko. Muntik ko nanamang napahamak ang anak ko."Rest, please," bulong ni mama sa'kin ng punong-puno ng pag-aalala.After that, they leave me alone, pero sinabi ni Tito na maraming tauhan si Maddix sa labas na nakabantay sa'kin dahil hindi pa nahahanap si Tito Alfredo.Hindi ko maisawasang isipin ang nangyare. Si Maddix. Pinag-alala ko nanaman. Yung namamaga sa kamay niya, dahil ba iyon sa pagpasok niya sa bahay para iligtas ako? Naramdaman ko ang hapdi ng balat ko at alam ko na may paso ako, pero ala
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75I know that it's good for me to cry, but I couldn't stop it when I was already alone at home. Days have passed; Maddix comes here, but we don't talk. He never tried to talk to me, kahit na nasa harap naman na niya ako. Mama is the one he often asks about me; even though he could ask me, he doesn't do that.He even brought me some fruits, but he is really so distant and cold.Now he is here. Gabi na at ayaw kong matulog kasi baka kapag umakyat ako ay aalis nanaman siya. I want to be with him kahit na hindi kami mag-usap. I just want to see him here and smell his scent. I miss him.Napahikab ako at napansin niya iyon."Matulog ka na," sambit nito, pero mabilis akong umiling ng pa-ulit-ulit sa kanya.Maybe because I'm pregnant. I always get sleepy. Palagi akong pagod kahit na wala naman ako halos ginagawa. I yawned again and immediately closed my mouth when I saw his gaze on me. I smiled at him, pero napasimangot ako nang seryoso pa rin ang titig niya sa'kin. We are watching TV, and h
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76 The employees greeted him when they saw him, pero ni isa sa kanila ay hindi niya pinansin, ni hindi niya tinapunan ng tingin. He is just serious while walking. He also walks ahead of me, while I just stare at his back. I've calmed down and stopped crying, but I feel like I'm going to cry again. I felt that his anger toward me caused him to fall out of love. I can't blame him if that's what happened. I feel that he already thinks that I don't deserve to be loved by him. Years ago, he protected my future, and now I almost lost our child again because I was so careless. Nang makarating kami sa labas ay pumarada ang kotse niya sa harap niya. Malungkot akong napatitig doon. May lumabas na nakaputimg lalake at binigay kay Maddix ang susi. Maddix opened the door for me, pero hindi ako lumapit roon. Napatitig ako roon bago siya tignan. I tried to smile habang umiiling. "K-Kung may gagawin ka pa, pababalikin ko na lang si Bella," sambit ko, pero nang mas luwagan niya ang pinto ay napapi
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77"Anak, open this door. Mag-usap kayo ni Maddix. Think about your decision first. Bakit ka naman nakikipaghiwalay bigla? Nasa sala siya and he is waiting for you! It's just your hormones, Aliyah." Mama kept saying that every time she knocked, but I ignored it."Aliyah! Come on, Anak. You shouldn't make decisions that fast. Huwag kang ganyan bumaba ka at kausapin mo siya," dugtong pa niya.Mama kept knocking on the door, pero hindi ako lumabas para sundin ang gusto niyang gawin ko. I locked myself in my room and cried a lot, but after a few hours, I calmed down. I don't know, but I felt like I wanted to just eat something.I don't know if it's part of my pregnancy, but if it's my hormones, like mama said, I don't know. Suddenly my sadness disappeared, and suddenly I just wanted to eat. It was already 8 p.m. when I went out. Ilang oras akong nagkulong sa kwarto ko. I have food inside my room because I have a mini fridge here. I did eat some fruit, and a while ago mom left some food t
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78"Oh! Let's eat, Anak." Mama said this when she saw me entering the dining area."Goodmorning!" Bati ni Maddix sa'kin nang makita ako. He smiled at me."There's no goodmorning kung ikaw ang bubungad ng umaga ko," masungit na sambit ko at gusto ko na lang ulit tumalikod at iwan sila rito para magkulong na lang ulit sa kwarto ko."Aliyah," mahinahong pagsaway sa'kin ni mama."Why are you still here?" Iritang tanong ko kay Maddix na ngayon ay nakaupo at humihigop ng kape."Let's eat?" Tanong nito sa'kin na para bang hindi niya narinig ang tanong ko."Why are you so rude, Anak? Huwag kang ganyan," Si Mama iyon, pero nakatitig lang ako ng masama kay Maddix."Wala ka bang trabaho?" Marahas na tanong ko."I'm on leave," He answered, so I just rolled my eyes again. I approached the table, but when I smelled something, I covered my nose."What's that smell? Ang baho!" "Aliyah? Ayos ka lang?" Si Mama.I noticed that Maddix stood up in a panic and came to me, but I passed him and quickly head
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79 Halos hinihingal ako pagkagising ko kinabukasan. I can't believe my dream right now. Napasinghab ako at hindi ko alam kung anong mararamdaman ko. What the hell? Why do I have a dream like that? What the hell is that? I closed my eyes tightly because I could feel the wetness of my underwear. Napasulyap ako sa tabi ko sa kama at wala namang Maddix doon. Why am I having a wet dream so suddenly? This is the fucking first time that I have had a dream like that! I couldn't stop cursing in my mind because of the dream I had. Naligo ako pagkatapos non at sinubukang kalimutan ang naging panaginip ko. Ang kaso lang, hindi ako makapaniwala na kahit sa pagligo ay iniisip ko iyon. I am thinking that Maddix is caressing my clitoriś. I close my eyes as the water flows over my body from the shower. I am now using a cold shower, but the fire in my body hasn't died down. Halos natapos ang pagligo kasabay ng paghawak ko sa sarili ko habang iniisip si Maddix. I can't believe myself. Nababaliw na ak
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