This is it, Jenna… You can do this…
I have been planning for this day for months; I have been waiting for this day for years. This is the day that dreams are made of. It should be the happiest day of my life.
I have dressed for the part, a classic princess dress with a modern twist, a beaded lace bodice with a thin beaded belt, a dreamy and voluminous tulle skirt that gorgeously flares out underneath. My porcelain skin is composed to perfection, and my hair is tucked neatly into place. And to finish off, a pair of stilettos that hug my feet and glimmers as it shines.
This is my wedding day.
But as I stare at myself in the full-length mirror, there is a growing awareness that something is not right. This is more than just the wedding jitters, more than just cold feet. Every part of my being tells me that I do not want to do this; I do not want to walk down the aisle and marry the man waiting for me at the other end.
I have known Brendan for as long as I can remember; we are high school sweethearts, such a cliche. We always believed that we were destined to be together forever. So straight from college, we settled down, we got the white picket fence, the dog and the cat. While the rest of my friends were discovering the world, I was busy playing house.
It took him six years to finally pop the question and another two to set the date. He is set in his ways, sometimes too set; he has forgotten how to live a little. Fun does not fall under his goals, nor does the word spontaneous. He is boring to the core; there is no exciting bone in his body, none at all. He is set on making partner one day; nothing else moves him in his world.
Don't get me wrong, I do love him, but it's not the way he would want me to. I have fallen out of love with him, and to me, that means more than any ring on my finger. I cannot marry my heart to a man whose body I do not even want.
I cannot marry Brendan.
I need to get out of here.
Do I leave him a note, or do I just disappear? I am sure in time he will understand; who knows, he might not even miss me when I am gone. All that I can scribble out of me is three words, ‘I am sorry.’ It sums up the end of a small lifetime together. It is enough; it has to be.
Here goes nothing. I grab my purse, my car keys, and my phone. Lifting my white wedding dress, I head for the door. I do not look back; I keep running towards where I shall find my car. I pass a group of confused wedding guests and the entrance to the church. Brendan sees me running away, away from the altar, away from where I am supposed to be. My secret is out; he knows. So I pick up the pace and firmly shut my door behind me as I get into my car.
As I turn the ignition, I see him appear in my rear-view mirror. He looks hurt and confused. My decision is made. I have to go. I put my car into gear and speed away from him and the life I do not want to have.
When the adrenaline subsides, the reality of what I have done sets in.
"Fantastic, Jenna!"
"You have really outdone yourself this time! Have you completely lost your mind?"
"Where do you intend going from here? What do you even do now? Have you thought about where you are going to stay?"
“No!”
"All you have is this way too expensive wedding dress, a phone, and if you lucky, a fifty in your purse."
But then, as I come up to a gas station, it comes to me, this is what I shall do. I am filling this tank, and where it runs out, that is where I am going to stay. Out there in the middle of nowhere, that is where I shall find my new home.
So with my head lowered and slightly embarrassed, I enter the small shop. The store clerk nearly drops off his chair. "What is the occasion?"
He smiles as he looks me over and points at my wedding dress. "You running a bit late for your wedding?"
"It's more like running away from it.”
"Ouch, poor guy, what did the man do to deserve this?"
"He is not what I thought I needed; I need more adventure in my life. I need to feel that I am alive. And anyway, he will get over it."
As I turn to leave, the guy behind the counter speaks again. "I hope you find the adventure you are looking for."
He stops and hesitates for a moment, "You might want to get rid of that wedding dress first."
I only wave him off; it would have been great if I grabbed my overnight bag on the way out.
Back in the car, I take the map that I bought and decide by the toss of a coin which direction I will head in. It's decided, I will head south. With the top down and my hair blowing in the wind, I pull my car onto the road. I am headed towards a new future, to a new life. To the complete unknown.
Just for a brief second, I relish in the thought of what I have done; I have abandoned my fiance at the altar, left my old life behind, I am on my way to nowhere, I am a runaway bride.
I chuckle at myself and put the sound of my radio louder.
With my head in the clouds, I set down a very long road, some parts are scenic, and some parts are, well, boring. It's beautiful and yet scary. This is where I want to be. I just hope this tank does not run dry right in the middle in the middle of boring.
At times a suffocating panic sets over my body. Did I make the right choice, or did I act in haste? But then I look at the open road, and my soul is set to rest.
After several hours and what seems like forever, I check the gas tank, it is starting to run low. A slight hint of panic, set in over my calm being, but then I remind myself why I am out here.
"I swear, I am starting to go crazy."
"I have never seen so much road in my life."
Then radio is starting to crackle; I turn the dial to find another station. I nervously start to giggle, but the sound of my favorite song sets me at ease.
"Oh, my favorite song is playing."
I set the music loud and sing at the top of my lungs.
“Oops, I did it again. I played with your heart, got lost in the game. Oh baby, baby. Oops, you think I'm in love. That I'm sent from above. I'm not that innocent.”
Then it happens. The car gives a few jerks and comes to a complete standstill. Perfect, I am really in the middle of nowhere, smack bang in boring, the last place I wanted to be.
"Perfect, Jenna!"
"I don't think this road will see another car in days."
"Where is the closest town even?”
"What if there are wild animals here that would eat me for breakfast?"
"Am I going to sleep in my car?"
"Oh my god, I going to die out here!"
There is nothing I can do but wait. I get into the back seat of the car, with my feet in the air and the music still loud. I sing as loud as I can to another one of my favorite songs; it is scary how I know every word of it.
I close my eyes; I am enjoying the sun on my face and the wind in my hair. The sound of my voice echoing across the fields. Then I open my eyes; I am scared out of my mind by someone standing over me.
"Where did you come from?! You should not creep up on people!"
Staring back at me is the most devilishly handsome man I have ever seen in my life. The deepest brown of brown eyes is piercing right into my soul, making my legs go weak in an instant. That cocky smile that is creeping around the corners of his mouth is nearly enough to send sensations of pleasure throughout my body, waking feelings that I have not felt for so long now. This handsome stranger is driving my body crazy by just that simple look.His perfect messed up brown hair is slightly blowing in the late afternoon breeze, and with that, the scent of his cologne attacks my senses, softwood and a hint of spice. If I have never seen a god, then there is one that is clearly standing over me.And the minute he speaks, I feel that I have died and gone to heaven, "You are in the middle of nowhere; there is not much creeping I can do.""What are you doing out in the middle of nowhere scaring helpless woman anyway?" My w
This is just wonderful. There is only one clothing store in this town, calling it a clothing store is even too kind. It is like something out of a Farmville movie. There is absolutely no way I am wearing these rags. Whoever designed these things should be fired. I won't even go as far as call them designed.I am seriously starting to doubt my brilliant idea to stay in this town; they will most certainly only have one of every other kind of store. Even worse, they will be joint stores, a pharmacy in a grocery store, a beauty salon in a barber. I am still struggling to say the darn place's name.This is an absolute nightmare.Now I am standing here with Clara, trying to convince me that this is my only option. "Jenna, there is really no other choice; you will have to wear these."Well, she has something coming, for she has no idea how stubborn I can be. 'I don't have to if I don't want to.""Are you going to carry on wearing that dress?" she asks me
Half an hour later, we in his truck on the way to the town that has the mall. It is very kind of him to take me, especially it being so far. Brendan would have never done anything so nice for me. He only cared about his increasingly boring job; that is probably why he was so boring himself.Tyler is a very good looking man; I think good looking is too subtle; he is as hot as hell. He has the most incredible brown eyes, a perfectly chiseled jaw; his lips seem soft. You can see his sculpted arms and chest through his tight shirt. He is a perfect specimen of a man.And, of course, I have stared at him for far too long as he has noticed. "You are looking at me like I am desert."I shyly look away and look outside the window. "I am not.""Where are you looking at then?"“Outside the window."He chuckles at me, and oh my, how damn hot that sounds, even his voice seems hotter than before. "Does my lips look like a window?""No," I say
After a few failed attempts to keep his hands off me, we find ourselves half-hour later back on the road. That was amazing; it is the second craziest thing I have done in two days. I have never kissed another man before; Brendan was my first and my only. Tyler made my body tingle and my knees weak. He seems like a man that knows what he wants, and I want to be the woman that he wants.The first few minutes of the trip are in silence; he, too, must be twirling the heated kisses over and over in his mind. Finally, I guess more out of trying not to cause himself any more frustration; he breaks the silence."So what is this deal with the wedding dress?""Nothing really, I just forgot to grab my overnight back when I left.""Must say it is a nice dress.""Pity I am never going to use it for what it really is intended."I watch as he hesitates for a few moments, not sure if he should ask, but he does anyway."Why did you do it?""Do
It's my third day in this forsaken town. Three days ago, I ran away from my life; I ran away from Brendan, my would have been future husband. He has been calling nonstop, day and night, hour to hour, minute to minute. I have not answered his calls or responded to his messages. I know it is a conversation I need to have with him, just not right now.I can see why these people want to live here; it is dead. The town is dead. It is just as dead as this piece of bacon in front of me. Not only do they have terrible taste in clothes, they clearly can't cook either. I can knock the cat sitting at the door completely unconscious with this thing. Let me not even start with this egg, if you can even call it that. This is the worst breakfast I have ever had in my life.“I don't think you can stab that thing anymore dead than it already is.”I nearly drop over backward off my chair as he comes from behind me, “Fuck. Where did you come from?”&
We turn up a dirt gravel road; there is nothing as far as the eyes can see, we stay on the road for another ten minutes. When we come around a turn, then I see it, the most beautiful house I have ever seen. It's not made from bricks or stone; it is from different kinds of wood. The windows are big, they are open, more windows than walls. It is surrounded by green grass all over, colorful white flowers everywhere, there is a pond with giant fish. Trees are surrounding the house for miles and miles."Is this where you stay? It is amazing.""The other small house is at the back of it. If you are going to stay in town, you can stay there.""Thank you; you really have been nice to me."He gets that damn sexy smile on his face, and I swear my knees give in all over again. With a husky voice, he speaks, "It is hard not to be nice to you."The tone of his voice vibrates over my skin. I take two swallow breaths and exhale. In a whimper, I speak to avoid my
The next day I wake up with a pounding headache; I had too much wine, way too much wine. I lift my head off the pillow to get up. It's throbbing too much; I can't move; I drop my head back in the pillow. It smells spicy; I immediately sit up straight. This is not my bed; it is not my room. I lift the covers; this is not my clothes.Oh my god.I am in Tyler's bed; his godlike body is stretched out next to me. He has a mischievous smile on his face; he has been watching me this whole time."I have never seen anyone so panicked in my life before.""Why am I in your bed?""I put you here."He seems to be rather satisfied with himself as the words roll from those lips that seem even more seductive than before."Why?" I ask."You were drunk and insisted.""Why would I do that?""Do what?""Insist. Insist you put me in your bed?""You told me you wanted to lay next to my naked body.""I did what? Don
We head to the pool, where we make ourselves comfortable on the deck chairs. The heat is almost unbearable; he gets up and sits behind me. He takes a block of ice; he runs it down the back of my neck, and down my shoulders. Then he slides it down my spine and my back. Taking the ice in his mouth, he runs it up to my back again. When he reaches the contours of breasts, he glides it by the sides, then in between. He rubs it over my nipple with my top still on.He finds the elastic of my bikini bottom and slowly pushes his finger in between the fabric and her skin. My voice hitches a pitch, and I become a stuttering mess. He slides the ice in and finds the center of my sensitive spot. He presses and circles. I feel myself start to squirm on the chair.I turn my body to face him, placing my legs around his waist. He starts pulling at the straps keeping the swimsuit together. He does not take it off; he lets it linger. His hands run up my leg, against my inner thighs, his f