“You mean the girly side of me?” I asked in an annoyed tone.“The equally stylish side of you, with a little bit of finesse. I’m not going to ask you to wear skirts but let’s just say that maybe you should try to make Nicholas think twice next time he calls you ‘brother,’ ‘boy,’ or ‘boyish.’”“Really? This is about Nicholas again?” I was starting to get mad.“Come on, Ken Clarke!” Terry was getting a little frustrated now. “I didn’t say chase him or seduce him. I just said, make him look at you twice. You like him. You’re denying that. But one day, you’ll admit it to yourself. And trust me, when you do, you will want him to see you as you are. Not as a little brother or as an androgynous roommate, but as the beautiful girl that you are.”I stared at Terry for a long time, unable to believe what she just said, and unwilling to admit that she might be right.Am I ready to admit it to myself? Do I want Nick to see me as a girl? Do I want him to be interested in me?I took a deep breath.
Just that thought alone made me want to drag Terry toward the counter. She had a point. If only Nick would know that even if I wear boyish clothing one hundred percent of the time, underneath all those clothes, I also have a hot body. The only difference between me and the skanks he takes home with him was that I don’t display mine for public viewing or auction.Terry pulled me into a shop that sells cocktail clothes afterward. I stopped by the door and raised a brow at her.“What?” she asked innocently.“I distinctly remember saying no Ken-turns-Barbie,” I said a little crossly.“I want to shop, too, you know. This is for me,” she said. I highly doubted that and yet I still came into the shop with her.For lack of nothing better to do, I checked out the racks to see the clothes that they sold. They were nothing overly fancy, but the styles were rather chic, simple but fashionable. Many of the cocktail clothes on display were flirty and sassy in bright colors of green, pink, yellow an
“Seriously? It’s a lame event. I’ve got better things to do here. It’s not about her, man. I’m totally over it. And I wish her well… Nope… Actually, I don’t care… I’m done…” It was Nick, speaking to somebody on the phone. “You can’t blackmail me into agreeing to this! That’s not fair, man! Come on!” He sounded frustrated this time. Like the person on the other line said something he could not say no to, even if he didn’t like it.I turned around and found him sitting on his reclining chair. His hair was in total dishevel and he was wearing a pair of dark blue pajama pants and a white shirt.I heard him take a deep breath. Then he said, “I’ll think about it. But trust me, if you’re cooking something in your head, it’s not going to work, man. That ship has sailed. Talk to you later.”Nick stared in space for half a minute. He looked as if he was remembering something, as if a part of his history just came back to punch him on the face. He took a deep breath and then he turned to me. Whe
Nicholas was standing between my legs, with both hands resting on top of the counter, only two inches away from my thighs. In a way, he was caging me, blocking my way so there was no way for me to escape him. His face was less than a foot away from mine. I could feel heat emanating from his skin. I could smell his faint, fresh, masculine aftershave.“N-Nick,” I said again, my heart pounding wildly. I was sure he could hear it hammering against my chest.He inched his face closer, testing what I was going to do, seeing if I would push him away. But my hands were frozen into fists resting above my thighs.“You owe me a kiss, kitten,” he said.My eyes widened. “W-what?”He raised a brow. “Remember our deal? One hit, one kiss.”“When did we… when?” I asked incoherently.He smirked and then he replied, “When did we agree to that? Last week. I suggested it. I remember you saying being kissed by a guy is gross. But I do not remember you saying no to my suggestion. When did you hit me? This m
I knew what he was going to do. But I didn’t find the courage and strength to stop him from doing it.I’ve kissed some guys for fun before and I’ve felt nothing. It would be over soon, I knew. Kisses are overrated, remember? Just close your eyes, wait for those rough lips to land on yours and count one to ten. Imagine playing drums in front of a huge crowd. You feel nervous, you don’t know what to expect, but it will be over soon enough. You’ll make it through without throwing up in front of your audience.I heard Nick’s deep sigh. I smelled his fresh aftershave, and I felt heat radiating from his skin. I smelled his minty breath and then I felt his lips on mine. His lips weren’t rough; they felt like velvet. And then suddenly…Fireworks!My nerves felt like exploding as his lips gently brushed against mine. I felt the spark that started from my veins, shooting electricity throughout my whole body. It charged me, sending me to depths I have never been in before and keeping me on fire.
Shit! Did he regret asking me out? Was he just making fun of me? Did he get scared and decided to leave instead?Suddenly, the doorbell rang. I waited for Nick to appear from his study to get it. By the second ring and he still didn’t show up, I decided to get the door.When I opened it, I was surprised to see Nick standing in the doorway, wearing jeans, a white shirt, and a leather jacket. His hair looked wet and the scent of his aftershave filled my nostrils. He looked like he just stepped out of the covers of a magazine. He was absolutely hot I could feel my throat drying up.He looked at me from head to toe and then he grinned. “Wow,” he whispered. “You look great.”I smiled at him. “You’re… you’re not bad yourself,” I said. “By the way, why did you ring the bell?”He shrugged. “I asked you out on a date. Usually, the guy picks the girl up.”I raised a brow at him. “Seriously? Even if the girl lived in the guy’s house?”He smiled sheepishly. “Corny, I know. But I told you I want
Did he really mean that? Did he mean for us to go beyond this date? Did that mean he has feelings for me? The way that I knew I have feelings for him? Our thoughts were interrupted by the arrival of the dessert, and I was glad for a little distraction. The heavy thoughts in my head were breaking my heart and giving me a headache. “Where’s your family?” I asked, breaking the silence. “My mother is in England. Along with my stepsister, who’s the same age as you, and my stepbrother, who’s a year younger than me.” “You get along well?” He nodded instantly. “They’ve been my family for years now. Didn’t feel like we’re not related by blood at all. Even though I was devastated that my parents divorced, I was happy I gained siblings. My sister wanted to be a fashion designer and my brother is playing in a band. They’re both very passionate artists. And I do whatever I can to support them.” I smiled at him sadly. “I wonder how my life would have been like if I had siblings. The closest I
I didn’t argue. Soon he was entering the city. I have no idea where we were going. I thought, what if he decided to show up in the city center and we run into people we know—people who know me as a confused androgynous girl. But then again, why should I care? I realized that it was far more liberating to never have to worry about what other people would say. They do not put a roof over my head, they do not feed me. Why should what they say or think matter so much?Nick stopped in front of the open beach. It was already nine in the evening and the shoreline was almost deserted. Nick went out of the car and opened the door for me.“Isn’t the beach closed?” I asked.“Did it stop me when I got my juvie record?” he asked back, laughing.“I suppose not. But I hope you weren’t planning on getting me involved in a crime.”“Why, you’re scared to tarnish your spotless reputation?” he asked teasingly.“If it means my father’s reputation will also be put on the line, then let’s get it on!”We wa