Chapter Thirty-Seven

I went to bed half past three in the morning after two glasses of whiskey, thinking that would make me tipsy enough to give me a good night’s sleep. But after an hour in bed, my dreams turned into nightmares. Nothing changed much. I still go back to that night. The man and my father visited me in my dreams again. As usual, I was waiting for Nicholas to save me. But tonight, he never appeared. As if he’d forgotten to save me, or perhaps, he’d given up.

I bolted up from bed, wide awake. Tears were streaming down my face and I was shaking in fear. I was quick to reach out to the space beside me, hoping to be in the comfort of the arms that rescued me that night, and each night afterward. But all I felt was the cold and empty sheets over the soft, unoccupied mattress.

I hugged my legs to my chest, resting my head on my knees. I realized that this was the stupidest thing I’ve done all week. I should have known that I wasn’t ready yet. Because of my stupid pride, I have forgotten that my w