LoPerrin’s steady breathing tells me that he’s asleep at last; finally full and satisfied to the point where he can relax, reassured that I’m here with him. I shifte every so slightly off of his chest so as not to wake him, noting how deliciously sore I was between my legs.I smile to myself. Worth it.Our bodies had tangled in so many positions that other parts of my body felt sore, too. Nothing broken or bruised, but wholly satisfied. I felt a blush at my cheeks just thinking about last night. The way he moved against me and with me. The bliss he wrought from my body. And how complete I felt when he was within me.I inched out of bed, careful not to jostle the mattress and padded to the bathroom, shutting the door quietly behind me.Flicking on the light, I took a look in the mirror. My hair was wild and disheveled. My makeup smeared a little under each eye, but not totally horrible. I had stolen Perrin’s dress shirt before he drifted off to sleep, my fatigue from our activities ha
PerrinThe hours seemed to pass faster than either of us wanted them to.The sunrise had greeted us as she let me worship her body, breaking through the windows as she exploded into pieces the last time. Since then, Lo had fallen asleep. She now slept soundly, tucked in my arm, her breath light and warm on my chest as she dozed. I stroked her hair, caught in my own state of blissful reverie before we broke the spell around us.A baby. Goddess. Lo was pregnant.It was a blessing. A surprise, of course, but a welcome one. Given my history with Jesamine, I had never let myself ponder the idea of having a family of my own. Adopted? Maybe. But Jesamine had put the brakes on that before the wheels ever started to turn. Goddess, that seemed like such a long time ago.But seeing Lo again this past year. Getting to know her. Falling in love with her? It had been easier than falling asleep; slowly, then, before I knew it: all at once.I could sense it now, even swear I could hear the heartbeat
Chapter 62PerrinTwelve years ago“Perrin? PERRIN!” My dad’s voice carried harshly through the hallway of the Beta Suite. “Perrin sweetie, are you here?” My mother’s voice carried more smoothly through the foyer on the heel of my father’s. Her words, however, had sounded sad.“Here mommy!” I leapt up from where Ethan and I had been playing on the floor of his bedroom. “Can I meet him?” I shouted through the hallway, running to meet her. “I can’t wait!” I remember my voice practically squealing at the thought of becoming a big brother. But seeing him? Mommy told me he’d have a squishy face and be all red but I didn’t care. He was my brother.But I rounded the corner, and, based on what I found, I skidded to a halt. Ethan, hot on my heels and also eager to meet Jamie, bumped into me and almost knocked me over.Mommy was sitting in a wheelchair, Dad behind her with his hands on the back, steering her inside the doorway. She was wearing a long loose dress. Her hair was unwashed and lim
PerrinPresent DayIt had taken me several years to understand what had happened that night. To understand what my parents endured, saying goodbye before his life had even begun, and burying my sibling out by the temple. I wished that I had been there, or had at least seen his face one time. I’ve spent years imagining what he would look like, haunted by the unknown. Would he look more like my mother? My father? Would he have looked like me? Nobody had talked about it back then. Mistra and Kyle had told Ethan not to say anything to me, so we didn’t talk about it either.One one hand, I felt a little grateful that I had never known him. It would have been horrible to have him taken away after I had grown to know him and love him. But the problem is that I had loved him. Loved him before I knew him. Loved him as a big brother should. And while I mourned as a child for the baby brother I never had, I mourned now with a deeper understanding of what it all meant. A parent should never b
Perrin“We need food,” she had said, after an hour or so lounging in silence. She was right. Of course, Lo was always right… especially when it came to food. We ordered room service, too consumed by the onslaught of emotions we had shared over the last few hours. About twenty minutes later, Dina brought up an overwhelming breakfast tray, filled with everything we could dream of. Steaming eggs. Bacon. Waffles. Strawberries and blueberries and toast with fresh jam. And the largest van of steaming coffee I had ever seen. Accompanied by a large carton of cream, of course. Chilled in a pitcher on ice, crisp and cold, just like Lo liked it.“Decaf, Perrin?” Dina grinned at me with a questioning smile. “Too much natural adrenaline, eh?”I grinned back, happy to be the excuse Lo needed as she was only going to be able to drink decaf until she gave birth. Dina’s all-too-knowing wink at me and my bare chest was all the embarrassment I could handle at the moment, however.Lo practically squeale
PerrinCharlie drove us to the infirmary. I shared a knowing look with Lo at the thought of what may happen if the two of us were left alone with a car again. For some reason, Charlie smirked at me as we slid in the backseat. He couldn’t know, could he? Lo agreed to come with me before meeting with Jennivah, insisting that her encounter with Jesamine had been brief, if not hijacked, by Justin. We had discussed it, and in addition to getting an appointment with Jennivah to ensure everything was progressing smoothly, we knew it would be important for Jesamine to be aware of ours news before anyone else. Not that she had a right to it, but given the modern family that would result, it was the right thing to do. We had wanted to tell my father. Deidre, Ethan and Kira and Gia–but when we had talked about telling her mother, Lo became dismissive. Not that I could blame her. Her mother had gotten engaged, let alone engaged to an Alpha. What that said about her childhood and the relationshi
PerrinJesamine and I don’t speak for the duration of our walk. She’s cold and brooding and I’m as lost in my own thoughts as she is.I still can’t get over what Lo did. What she actually offered. Did she understand that she had essentially written Jesamine a blank check for the future of this pack? Our family?The hour is over faster than I realize. I escort Jesamine back to her room, and she sits without a word, removing her shoes and rubbing her feet.“We’re going to have to make some decisions soon,” I say to her, unsure if she’s even hearing me. “You heard her. We have one week.”“You can force her hand. Give us more time.” She says is so casually, but it hits me like a ton of bricks. Us. I stutter, aghast that it’s the first time she’s actually referred to us in a joint way since the conception. ‘Us.’ As is, we. The parents. Both of us. Together.But I know that even one week is generous. Lo’s condition, like most secrets, will come out eventually, and likely sooner than we expe
Kira I really didn’t want to go this morning. Not because I had anything to hide. I didn’t. I haven’t drank since the incident at the infirmary, but Goddess knows I didn’t want to talk about that. Fuck. Just thinking about last night makes my blood boil. I had gone to fucking apologize. And I had no idea how that had happened. He had been… almost… almost sweet. He covered for me with Perrin when I was crying in the car. Had been a perfect gentleman. He had even wiped my tears… he’d been some combination of friend and… and… And what? No. Nothing. It must have been all in my head. Maybe I was still hungover. Fuck. And then I showed up like some desperate, crazy psycho girl outside of the Archives in the middle of the night and seeking what… approval and forgiveness for something that I didn’t do? No. This was all insane. I should never have gone. Besides, I walked in on whatever type of booty call he was conducting in the archives. Fuck. If Mark or Marge got wind that he was entert