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29: What to do
When I get home and my parents ask how my tests were, I simply reply I did my best. This response is met with optimism from my mom and a prayer that God will handle the rest, while my dad seems disappointed, believing my best coupled with how I sound isn't enough.
I can't blame him though — even though I wish he has little faith in me. My best has never been enough to get me good grades. No matter how hard I try to study, the results never end up in my favour. Especially when I'm studying on my own. It's always been with Eric's help that I scale through any test.
Although we've been studying days before the test week, Eric wasn't there to soothe my fear and tell me the test questions won't be that hard. Before I enter any test or exam hall, I always become panic-stricken; my clothes are soaked with sweat while I bite the inner part of my cheeks and rub my hands down my skirt. During such times, he'll
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Finding Us 30: Joined at the hips
Our cloth business is doing well, even though there are a few losses incurred from refunds made to dissatisfied customers. Nonetheless, Dare has amazing marketing strategies that have me smiling at my account balance after I hear my notification sound.“My first hard-earned money.” I grin foolishly.Dare laughs.“Yikes.” I put my phone in my bag. “So when do we start another batch?”“Whenever you're ready. Although, with exams coming up, do you think you can cope? Won't it be best if we let this semester go and start next semester?”“Nah, don't worry. I can always find time.”Even if I'll be as busy as a bee, I'll choose sewing anytime, any day.“Babe,” Anita calls from the counter. “Do you want fish or meat?”
Finding Us 31: Dead
Annie flings the door open, interrupting our conversation as Amanda and I jerk at our doors where we're standing.“Ah-ah. What is it? Why are you running like someone they're pursuing?” I ask, peering through the door as she bends over, panting.“Diamond... Dead body... Road... Side.”“Eh? What are you saying?” I ask.Amanda hurries down to the kitchen and returns with a glass of water she gives Annie. Annie moves Amanda's hand aside and straightens, her eyes glistening with tears.It then clicks in my head when I try to piece her words together. “Diamond is dead?!”She nods.Time stops. My heart plummets.Diamond is dead. Diamond is dead. No, it's not true. Diamond isn't dead.
Finding Us 32: Something happened last night
Eric slept over. Again. I was crying so much that he believed I'd crumble if he left.To take my mind off everything, we talked about anything unrelated to Diamond's death as we ate the pizza. It worked and soon, I fell asleep only to wake up later in the night to find his face an inch away from mine.His arm is crossed over my waist like the last time as his calm breath fans my face.Instead of going back to sleep, I remain the way I am, watching him sleep as I analyse his features. His left eyebrow is slightly raised due to how that side of his face is atop his arm. There's a poker dot (usually known as God's mark) on the right side of his cheek. It's so tiny that I sometimes forget it's there. I almost reach for the dot, amazed by how that tiny part of him enhances his charm, when his eyelids flutters and I shut my eyes immediately.“Do I have something on my face?” his voice is quiet and raspy
Finding Us 33: The cold truth
“Debby!” My name is called out and as much as I don't want to answer, I have to.Dare waves me over to our usual table where Mariam and Eric are seated.When Eric looks at me, there isn't a hint of the love I believed I saw the night before. He appears detached as he stares at me like I'm a stranger.When he looks away, a huge lump forms in my throat, making it hard for me to swallow. I will my feet to move, even though I wish to slip into a secluded corner and scream my head off.“I was just asking Eric where you were,” Dare says as I sit.I simply hum in reply.When I saw Mariam by Eric's side, I turned my back to them, hiding amongst the crowd as they walked by. If I knew they were headed to this same canteen — which should've been obvious since we alw
Finding Us 34: Regrets
Exams are over and everyone gets to go home for the holiday. The excitement in the air is foreign to me. Try as I might, my emotions merely rotate between frustration and despair.As I stare at the living room, my eyes sweeping across the objects that fill it up before they rest on Diamond's door, all I can feel is regret. I never should've been ignorant of Diamond's plight. I should have done better. Not only that, but I never should've deluded myself into thinking my story with Eric will be like a fairytale — a dream come true. Likewise, I never should've disregarded my virginity and given it up to a guy who was so confused that he never really cared.A door clicks open, and I turn to see Amanda coming out of her room, her big travelling bag in one hand. The both of us decided to leave a week after exams — which is today. The one-week delay was so we'd put our things in order.
Finding Us 35: Busted
A few days later, I get a call from Diamond's older brother. A witness finally stepped up to attest to Charles killing Diamond. Her brother goes on to thank me for helping out, and I let him know I didn't do anything, to which he thinks otherwise.Even though I wish I could have done better while Diamond was alive, I'm glad that Charles is behind bars and hopefully, will get the punishment he deserves.Later that day, I call to inform Annie and Amanda, who are both happy to hear the news.***My siblings are finally on holiday, so we're all watching a movie in the living room.A knock on the gate prompts Joy and me to exchange a questioning look.“Maybe it's Oluchi or Tayo,” Joy says and gets up to go check.
Finding Us 36: The truth that terrifies
My dad drills a hole through my forehead with his intense glare. Although Mom assured me he won't kill me, I'm hoping that also applies to looks because this one seems to be a killer.“What did I tell you when you went to school?” he finally replies all my rambling. “I said, focus on your books. Don't let anything distract you.”“I tried my best.”“Obviously, your best wasn't enough.”“I'm sorry,” I mumble.He's quiet. Says nothing. Makes the air feel like glass that'll shatter at the slightest squeak. When he finally speaks, I hear that glass crash.“We're bringing that sewing machine back home before school resumes. It's that thing that's causing you to lose focus.”My head whips up. “Dad, no.”“No what? I gave you that machine, so it can help you financially; instead, you focused all your attention on it and left your books.”“Ca
Finding Us 37: What he wants
“Big sis,” Joy says at my door.I look up from my phone.“Daddy's calling you.”“Why?”She shrugs. “I don't know. He just said I should call you.”“Is mommy there?”“Yes.”I wonder what he wants to talk to me about. “Okay, I'm coming.”Joy leaves while I wear my kimono over my nightie and keep my phone on my table.The sound of the TV is all I hear as I approach the living room and my heart begins to palpitate.Since I told my dad about my results, he's only spoken to me on general terms: either sent me on errands, asked me where certain things are and the likes of these. No word has been said about my bad result or his threat to take away my sewing machine, so I start to think this is the reason he calls for me.Joy enters the living room, sits on the armchair as I stand at the archway.
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