Lunch for Jordan

JORDAN

The drive down to the office was like death to me. Nothing else could be seen, not the roads, not the drivers, not the cars or the buildings. Because I was lost in a dark place, in my dark thoughts and my hurting heart. It should not hurt so much, it should not feel so terrible because she was only my wife, a friend who I was trying to make good by. She had absolutely no place in my heart and simply should not affect me as much. But it did anyway and that was the anger I felt.

I had thought of running back to her, calling her back or maybe following her back to her room when she had left mine. I had thought of taking back my words and telling her that I did not mean any of those things I said, not just because we were in a good place but because I could not afford to return to this dark abyss of mine that did nothing but remind me of my pain, my life and how it would end. But I did nothing of that sort and watched her go away leaving behind the emptiness and the gentle fragranc