“Nervous?” Kelvin asked. Leila shook her head and he offered her a big smile. They were at the clinic in California to run tests to confirm her pregnancy. The kit might have showed positive but they needed a doctor’s report to confirm it. Kelvin slipped an arm behind her and Leila leaned on him. “I’m nervous.”
“But why?” She lifted brown eyes to him. He shrugged. Leila wasn’t the only one who worried about how things would end up. He did too. He was just better at hiding his worries than she was. “Kev?”
“Don’t know.” He drummed his fingers on his knees. The doctor had asked them to wait in the corridor since he was attending to another patient. The door opened and the doctor walked out. Both of them stood. His hand descended to her lower back and he guided her into the doctor’s office. Once they were seated, Kelvin found himself smiling for no reason. “Good day, doc.”
“Good day.” The doctor smiled at Leila, then looked towards Kelvin.
The morning sickness was horrible. Kelvin hated it. They had been having breakfast when Leila rushed to the toilet. He held her hair away from her face, rubbing circles on her back to calm her down. Two months into her pregnancy and they had still not figured out all her triggers. She liked some things more and hated some others. The only good thing was that she had also started hating sea food so he didn’t have to be tortured by the sight of them. Kelvin guided her to the sink, filling a cup with water for her to rinse her mouth. “Are you sure you’re okay?” “Yeah. It will pass.” Knowing the touch would comfort him, Leila brought his hand to her stomach. The bump was only slightly visible. He hugged her from behind and they stared at their reflection in the mirror. Kelvin kissed her neck. “What time is your appointment?” “2 pm?” she asked. Kelvin smiled. She forgot things more often now but he found
“What?” the couples chorused. “Two heartbeats,” the doctor answered like they didn’t hear it the first time. Kelvin raised his hand. Wait a fucking minute. What was he trying to say? “What do you mean?” Leila asked before her husband recovered. She placed a hand over her belly but removed it immediately because there was gel on her skin. Turning to Kelvin with a smile, she said, “I’m freaking out.” “You don’t have to freak out. You are having twins.” Kelvin’s jaw dropped. Leila let out a small gasp. “It must run in the family,” he said, looking at Leila who could only fake a smile. “That explains the unusually higher appetite than in most women. The other one was hiding behind his sibling. Look.” He tilted the screen so they could see it. Kelvin only saw a black and white blob but he nodded. “It’s too early to determine the gender but in a couple of weeks, we should be able to tell.” “We’ll wait,” Kelvin answered. Leila nodded. “We w
Leila was big. Her stomach was swollen and if she didn’t know she was expecting twins, she would have been frightened. For now, she was off work. She had managed to delay it until the last month of the third trimester. Pushing herself off the bed was among the few things that had become difficult for her to do. She threw one leg over the bed, then slowly moved the other one. Her breath came out heavily. She hadn’t done much but she was already tired. The shirt she was wearing had turned into a crop top revealing her stomach. She managed to get out of the bed and padded to the dresser. Her breath was heavy, she was so tempted to crawl back to the bed and sleep. She combed a thick brush through her hair. According to their last visit to the hospital, she and her babies were fine. She was due any time soon. Say, a week. Leila was tired. And she missed her husband. She palmed her stomach, traced the stretch marks on her stomach. Her body had changed so much. The
Leila was feeling strange. She had been for a long time now but couldn’t put her feelings into words. Camilla and Calvin were in their cribs, crying at the top of their lungs. But she stood over them without a care, watching spit dribble down the sides of their lips. A good mother would have rushed to help them but that was the issue. She didn’t know what was wrong with her. She couldn’t connect with her twins and she didn’t know who to tell.The thought of hurting herself and the babies had come to her so many times. Even as she stared at them, she had this crazy thought to throw them against the wall so she could permanently end their crying. After that, she would kill herself so nobody blamed her. This time, cut deeper into her skin so she could bleed out from the wound.Guilt came as fast as the thought left. She walked backward until her back hit the wall. She slid down to the floor and hugged her knees to her chest. Tears poured out
Postpartum depression. PPD. It was what the doctor said Leila might have. Kelvin knew something was off the moment he walked into the house to the sound of his babies crying. They waited so long to have kids and she was depressed after birthing them. This was hard.He took Leila’s hand in his. She hadn’t spoken a word since they walked in to see the doctor. The last few weeks, she was different. She ate less and zoned out a lot. His mother said she was tired from the feeding and babies stress. His mother-in-law agreed with her. He had wanted to cancel the exclusive breastfeeding but Leila had insisted. Since the twins arrival, she hadn’t asked him for anything so when she said she wanted to continue pumping more milk for them, he couldn’t say no.But he could see the difference. The hollowness of her cheeks, the drier skin and tired eyes. Life wasn’t easy for him but it couldn’t be compared to pumping milk for two tiny hu
It was tough. Tougher than the doctors promised. It was on a Saturday and the twins were bawling their eyes out. They had refused everything. Their feeding bottles were on the floor. The maid was as confused as Kelvin. He was out of his wits. They seemed to want their mother. But the problem was that the doctor hadn’t certified her fit enough to be around the kids.“Okay,” he said to himself. “Okay. I can do this.”The maid picked the feeding bottle and he collected them from her. Edging closer to his babies, he hummed a kids song to calm them down. They stopped crying long enough for him to insert the bottles into their mouths. But that only lasted a few songs before they spat it out and began crying again like they rehearsed it.Frustration curled through Kelvin’s veins. The maid picked Calvin and he carried Camilla, rocking her from side to side but she just wouldn’t quit. God. He was losing his mind. What
Leila was feeding the twins. She was feeding them without Kelvin’s or the maids’ help. A grin flashed across her lips, this was a big accomplishment to her. Her husband’s number was on speed dial should something go wrong. Having made great progress over the last few weeks, the doctor had encouraged breastfeeding.Leila cooed at Camilla who pulled on her sore nipple. It hurt but Leila only smiled at her mini-replica. Her daughter ate more than her son. Camilla burped to let her mother know she was full. Gently, Leila laid Camilla on the bed, then picked Calvin to replicate the same process. Camilla always went first because she was less patient. After the feeding was done, she slid into the big bed with both of them. These kids were her whole world.Leila didn’t know when she fell asleep. Someone shook her awake. Kelvin, her husband. Her heart soared, she looked down to the bed to see her kids were missing.“Where are they?” s
Joy. Joy in his heart. That could only be the emotion he was feeling. Kelvin smiled cheekily at his wife as she defended her cause. She wanted to take the kids to their grandmother and would be there for a day.Kelvin knew she was doing it for him to get rest and a break from them. Over the past few days since she recovered, she had taken charge of most of the feeding. He didn’t need her to feel like she had to repay him for taking care of his babies. They were the flesh of his own flesh. He would do it again and again without complaint. Besides, none of it was her fault.His wife continued to tell him how the time away from them would be good. But Kelvin only focused on the shape of her lips. She had the sexiest lips known to man. And now she was back to hitting the gym, her shape was sexier than ever. The pregnancy unlocked new features for her. Wider hips, thicker thighs and fuller breasts. Kelvin wanted nothing more from her at this point than to take t