Fifty four

CHAPTER 54

GLENN

I was all dazzled, how in the hell could this happen and why now, some part of me wanted to believe all this was a kind of joke but the more I thought about it, the more it seemed like reality.

I was at the crossroads, for some reason I didn't want to believe all that she was saying about being married to him.

Yet the impact of her words rested somewhere in my mind, making it heavier as I walked the dark corridor to my home.

I flipped on the switch as I suddenly had that urge for a warm bath, for a minute I stood still right there staring at myself in the mirror.

Staring at myself in the mirror, I didn't know which was more dramatic, the fact that I was covered by the blood of a man that would never be mine or the fact that I thought I had a chance.

Memories of the hospital scene flooded through my mind again and again, why had he denied knowing me?

I was trying to fix all the wrongs that were happening all at once but no matter how hard I tried , fixing this looked impossible. I was left with acceptance.

A part of me had to accept that all of this was happening, and perhaps there was nothing I could do to stop it .

While it was alarming it did point across to the brute fact that humans and supernaturals all have this about them and it had everything to do with mistrust.

On a normal day I would have cried my eyes out but presently not even the sky would take my tears, it looked like it was done doing that, it was done taking every but of the pain I was throwing right at it.

At this minute my soul felt bare like I was in a kind of travail —

This time my memories were filled with things of the past, some part of me wanted so badly to at least know how things were faring back home.

I crawled into my bed to sleep, shaking visibly like a leaf before being kissed by autumn, of what use is my heartbeat?

At that time, I felt fate was playing a huge role in all of this, just when I thought that all were settled and that I might perhaps be with this man I so much loved, it was pulling another twist.

It seemed crazy that life would treat me this way, more crazy that I haven't been loved like I should be loved, that I haven't shared a kiss with those who I felt were deserving —

Moon ray shone into the room, lighting up any bit of object in its path but not myself, I was left as a shadow, a Shadow hovering through the room in search of peace and happiness I was certain I wouldn't find , my eyes lid finally closes to dreamscape or perhaps a night filled with nightmares.

****

"Oh my god, I didn't see that coming!" Ann had hands on her head in disbelief and her heart right there in her mouth.

I had been briefing her about how my day had been since she dropped me off on the road and trust me even after hiding most of the vital parts it shook most of the room.

It was Friday, which came with a lesser job. I barely dragged myself earlier than usual to work since I couldn't get myself to sleep.

Some part of me was still worried about Santi, while I had come to my conclusion forgetting was like me doing myself a huge favor. It didn't change many truths.

"What are you going to do about all of this?" She asked.

I stood there still for a minute, if there was anyone that sure as hell asked a puzzling question it was Ann.

I knew she cared well, and each time she asked it was for a reason yet I couldn't change my mindset now, it was like some part of my mind had made up about how everything was going to be, like I was finally succumbing to reality.

"Glenn?" I promised myself I wouldn't cry but already tears had started forming in my eyes.

"You want the honest truth Ann?" I asked. "I don't know , I am just so confused."

I had my face in my palms, the truth was I had never been so much confused in my entire life.

"I don't know at this point, I am not even sure of what I want."

"You have to think—"

" I am, can't you see… My mind is going insane at this time and there is nothing I could possibly do about it.

"Don't say that, what happened to hope?" She asked, looking at me with a fixed gaze.

"Hope died a long time ago, and it just did again yesterday."

She listened to what I said over and over again, my words felt heavy against her heart as I listened to it thudding heavily.

I must have formed a kind of relationship with this woman, one that would let her react this way.

"I just hope all of this just disappears so quickly, I can't deal with this much pain, why did she come here in the first place?" I shook my head with the thought heavy in my head.

"Sometimes, that is how life treats you. "

I sighed afterwards, some part of me didn't just want to accept the fact that life could be this cruel, it had treated me so unjustly all this While and not given me second chances.

"Cheer up." She tapped my shoulder and squeezed it together.

I looked at the door longingly, at one point in my mind I could see him standing right there picking stuff like he had done that other day.

Maybe Ann was right. I was reaching that point that I can't question life.

"Things would get better." She reassures me.

I shifted under the weight of her words. For reasons I didn't know her words reached the deepest part of me and broke a nerve.

That will of acceptance, that zeal to push on further. At some point I thought I'd grown out of looking back at my failure —wasn't that why I left him in the first Instance.

It turned out that every decision I made somewhat created a kind of decay deep in my soul.

I realized that mistakes like these were doomed to happen, come to think of it, it was like embracing destiny.

This certainly was far from what I wanted for myself. For a minute I closed my eyes and let everything drift away, memories of my failures creeped through the wind like a dark cloud unwilling to depart.

Like a shoe that didn’t fit anymore, I was stuck in an array of expectations, expectations I knew were definite and infuriating.

“All that long talk is depressing. " I muttered.

She smiles. " It is hard, but trust me you have to try to forget some of these things. "

I scoffed. " Trust me, my life is more complicated than all of this. "

If there was anything I was certain of, it was the fact that she wouldn't understand all that I was trying to tell her.

The last thing I would do to myself was to let her know I was a wolf.

I couldn't of course do that and lose the only friend I had managed to make for myself.

I knew Ann, she wouldn't be able to deal with the news and even if she did, I could have sworn she'd bring it up every day.

She was like a dog with a bone—

"I know it would be hard for you to forget, just take the situation gradually and you would."

My gaze had hardened a flicker at her words.

I knew she was trying to make the situation better but the more she spoke, the more she realized that she might not know me too well.

For a second we made eye contact, I returned my attention to the price tags I was working on .

“Stop worrying and trust your instincts.”

It was the last words she said and I could feel the true impact of them in my heart's, it was exactly what I was going to do since fate had decided to play this trick.

"All I see is a girl in love."

I could have said anything to deny it,

but instead, I didn't…could it be that she was speaking the truth, I didn't say a word instead I let a silence full of unspoken words spread between the both of us.

The whole feeling was a feeling of deep terror and thrill in my soul, enough that I could feel my soul being consumed.

I realized one thing: Ann was most certainly right, I was madly in love with Santiago. The true revelation created a wave in my chest as my phone buzzed.

"Hello."

"Hello, am I on to Miss Glenn."

"Guess, you are."

"We are calling from the hospital, Mr. Santiago requests your attention . "