05

“Don't hide from us, little pup. Don't you want to play with the wolves?

Beta Valeriu's voice rings around me as I hide under the stairs of the empty house, avoiding some cobwebs that get caught in my long blond hair. Out of breath, I sink to the floor and wrap my arms around my legs, trying not to inhale the thick odor of damp and dust. Closing my eyes, I pray to the moon goddess that they get bored of chasing me, but I know. No goddess will save my ass tonight. Not when I'm being hunted by real wolves.

I made a mistake. A big mistake. I went to a pack party, like all my other classmates, at the beta's house to celebrate the end of school and, personally, my eighteenth birthday. For some small reason I thought it might be okay for one night. Be like them.

Not just another one of the orphaned children the pack keeps alive because of laws created by a goddess no one has seen in hundreds of years. I should have known betas-in-training would get drunk and decide that chasing me down for another one of their "fun" beatings would be a good way to prove themselves.

I wipe the blood from my bottom lip where one of them fisted me in the woods, and look down at my blood-soaked fingers in a beam of moonlight shining through the broken wooden wall behind me.

I don't know why I think someone will save me. I'm nothing to them, to the pack, or to the moon goddess I pray to every night, as everyone in this pack does.

The moon goddess hadn't saved me from shit . Heavy footsteps echo closer, changing from crumpled leaves to thuds on the concrete floor, and I know they're in the house now. A mouse runs alongside my leg and I almost scream as I jump backwards, colliding with a metal panel that vibrates and slams against another, giving away my location to the wolves that hunt me.

Shit.

My hands shake as I stand and walk slowly out into the middle of the room, Beta Valerius enters with two footmen who stagger to his side. I look around the room, see that the stairs are broken and there is a huge hole on the second floor. It seems to have appeared in a fire, but it has no other way out. I'm in real trouble right now. They stop in an intimidating line, the three of them muscular and big enough to lift a car. Their black hair is the same color, I'm sure it must be because they're all cousins, and they have super tanned skin, which doesn't match my pallor. Considering I'm an orphaned child, I could at least look the same as them, but no, the moon goddess gave me blonde hair that always grows fast and fair skin, full of freckles that attract attention. I look like the moon compared to the beauty of the sun with everyone in my pack.

Beta Valeriu takes a long drink from his drink, his eyes gleaming green, his wolf making it clear he enjoys the hunt. Valeriu is the youngest beta, taking over from his father, who retired these days at the age of two hundred and gave the role to his son of his own free will. But Valeriu is an asshole. That simple. He may be cute, as most of the five betas are, but each of them lacks a certain amount of brains. But the truth is, wolves don't need smarts to be betas, they just need to be of the right bloodline and kill when the alpha snaps his fingers.

All wolves love to hunt and kill. Damn, I'm always the prey in this pack.

“You know you can't run away from us, little Mairin. Little Mary, the lamb that runs from the wolf,” he hums the last part, taking a slow step forward, his shoe rubbing the dirt beneath his feet. Always the height jokes with that asshole. He may be over six feet tall, and that's fine, my height of six feet isn't intimidating, but no one has heard the saying: small but deadly?

Even if I wasn't mortal at all.

"Who invited you to my party?"

“The entire room has been invited,” I replied.

He chuckles, the cold sound echoing around me like a ripple of frost.

“We both know you can belong to that pack, but it's only because of the law about killing female children. If not for that, our alpha would have ripped you in half long ago.

Yes, I know the law. The law that female children cannot be killed due to the absence of female wolves born in the pack. There's about one female for every five wolves, and it's been that way for a long time, and nobody knows why. So when they found me in the woods aged twelve, with no memories and barely alive, they had to take me in and save my life.

A life, they reminded me every day, that I had been given just because of that law. The law didn't stop the alpha from treating me like the shit on the bottom of his shoe or beating me half to death for fun. But, just me. The other orphaned child who lives with me is male, so he doesn't get the "special" attention that I do. Fortunately.

“We both know you can't kill me, or hit me hard enough to get attention without the alpha here. So why don't you go and find some silly girl to keep you busy at the party? I let go, tired of it all. Tired of never saying what I want to these idiots, fearing the alpha all the time. A bitter laugh escapes Valeriu's mouth and this time his entire eyes sparkle. Your friends' too, I realize right away that I've crossed the line with my sharp tongue.

My carer at the orphanage always said my mouth would get me in trouble.

Looks like he's right once again.

A menacing growl erupts from Beta Valeriu's chest, making the hairs on my arms stand on end as I step back just as he shifts. I've seen it thousands of times, but it's always amazing and terrifying at the same time. Wolf energy, pure magic of the dark green forest, explodes around his body as he changes form. The only sound in the room is their creaking bones and my rapid, panicked breathing as I search again for a way out of here, despite knowing it's pointless.

I just poked a wolf. A beta wolf, one of the most powerful in our pack.

Good job, Irin. Great way to stay alive.

The transformation magic disappears, leaving a large white wolf in the space where Valeriu was. The wolf looms over me, as most of them do, its head huge enough to eat me with just one bite. Just in time for him to step forward to attack; and I brace myself for something painful, the shadow of a man leaps from the slats above me, landing with a thud. Dressed in a white cape covering jeans and a shirt, my foster caretaker completely blocks my form from Valeriu's view, and I sigh in relief.

“I suggest you leave before I teach you what an experienced, albeit retired, beta wolf can do with a young pup like you. Trust me, it's going to hurt, and our alpha is going to turn a blind eye.

The threat hangs in the air, spoken with an authority Valeriu would never dream of having in his eighteen-year-old voice. The room is silent, filled with dense tension for a long time before I hear the wolf running away, followed by two pairs of fast moving footsteps. My tough foster caretaker turns around slowly, lowering his hood and pushing his long gray hair out of his face. Covered in wrinkles, Mike is an elder, and to this day, I have no idea why he volunteered to work with the pack's orphans. His blue eyes remind me of the pale sea I once saw when I was twelve. He always dresses like a Jedi from the human movies, with long capes and hip-mounted swords that look like lightsabers when they glow with magic, and he tells me that's his style.

His name is more human than most pack names that are overused. My name, which is the only thing I know about my past thanks to a note in my hand, is about as unusual as it gets. According to an old book of names, it means "their rebellion" , which makes no sense. Mike seems like a normal name for humans, and from the little interaction I've had with them through their technology, his name couldn't be more common.

“You're very lucky my back was hurting and I decided to go for a walk, Irin,” he comments in a stern tone, and I sigh.

“I'm sorry,” I reply, knowing there's not much more I can say at this point. “The mating ceremony is tomorrow, and I wanted a night of being normal. I shouldn't have sneaked out of the orphanage.

“No, you shouldn't when your freedom is so close,” he counters, taking my chin gently in his fingers and turning my head to the side. “Your lip is cut, and there's a sizable bruise on your cheek. Do you like to catch these puppies?

“No, of course not,” I say, pulling my face away, the rusty taste of blood still in my mouth. "I wanted to be normal!" Is it too much to ask?

“Normal is for humans, not werewolves. That's why they gave us the UK and Ireland and then built walls around the islands to keep us from leaving. They want normal, and we want nothing more than what's here: our pack,” he begins, narrating what I already know. They agreed three hundred years ago that we would take this part of the land for ourselves, and the humans would take the rest. Nobody wanted miscegenation, and that was the best way to keep the peace. So the lands of the United Kingdom were divided into four packs. One in England, one in Wales, one in Scotland and one in Ireland. There are only two packs left now, thanks to the werewolf wars: the Ravensword that is my home, that worships the moon goddess, and the Fall Mountain that rules Ireland, a pack that we are always at war with. Whoever they worship is not our goddess, and everything I know about them suggests they are brutal. No feelings. Cruel.

Which is why I never tried to leave my pack and go there. It might suck here, but at least it's kind of safe and I have a future. Somehow.

"Do you think it will be better for me when I find my partner tomorrow?" I ask, not that I want a partner who will control me with his wolf energy. But it does mean I'm going to change into a wolf, like all the other females can do after they mate, and I've always wanted that.

Plus, a small part of me wants to know who the moon goddess has chosen for me. The other half of my soul. My true partner. Someone who won't see me as the orphan without a family, and will just want me.

Mike looks at me, and something unreadable passes through his eyes. He turns and starts to leave the abandoned house and I run to catch up. Snowflakes fall in my hair as we drive through the woods, back to the orphanage, the place I will finally leave tomorrow, one way or another. I pull my leather jacket up over my chest over my brown T-shirt for warmth. My torn and worn jeans are soaked with snow after a few minutes of walking, the snow getting thicker by the minute. Mike is quiet as we walk along the stones that mark the small trail until we reach the top of the hill overlooking the main city of the Ravensword pack.

Tall buildings surround the River Thames which flows through the middle of the city. The bright lights make it look like a reflection of the stars in the sky, the sight is beautiful. It may be a troubled place, but I can't help but admire it. I remember the first time I saw the city from here, a few days after I was found and healed. I remember thinking that I had woken up from hell to see heaven, but I soon learned that heaven was too good a word for this place. The night was silent here, without the normal noise of people in the city, I look down silently wondering why we stopped.

“What do you see when you look at the city, Irin?

I let out a deep breath.

“A place I need to escape.

I don't see your disappointment, but I can easily feel it.

— I see my home, a place with darkness in the corners, but so much light. I see a place where even an orphaned wolf with no family or ancestors can find happiness in the future,” he replies. “Stop looking to the stars for an escape, Irin, because tomorrow you'll find your home in the city you're trying so hard to see only darkness.

He continues to walk, and I follow, trying to do as he asks, but within seconds my eyes are back to the stars again.

Because Mike is right, I'm always looking for a way out, and I always will. I wasn't born into this pack, and I come from outside the walls that have existed for hundreds of years. That's the only explanation for how they found me in the woods with nothing more than a small glass bottle in my hand and a note with my name on it. No one knows how it's possible, least of all me, but somehow I'll figure it out. I need.