There's a saying that all dogs come back home. Whether it's been weeks, months, or years. You somehow always find the men of your past, I mean, the dog- trying to claw their way back into your life.And that's a fact.Wala na sila sa unahan pero natulala pa ako ng ilang minuto doon. Hindi ba ako namamalik-mata? Maayos pa ang mga mata ko sa huling check-up ko! Hindi ako pwedeng magkamali!Si Lazarus talaga iyon!Napailing-iling ako. There's no point wasting my energy trying to figure out why he act the way he do or why he feel the way he feel, because chances are, he don't even know and even when he do know what his issue is, it still doesn't matter.He doesn't matter anymore.I've been doing so well without him. Ano naman kung nandito siya? Ano naman ngayon kung may kasama siyang babae? At ano naman kung umakto siya na parang hindi siya pari? Ayos na ako. Ayos na ayos!Ang akala 'kong hindi ko kaya dahil wala siya sa tabi ko ay nakaya ko.At tsaka... Hindi na ako si Aviona. Patay na
"Aviona..." nanginginig ang boses nitong saad.Umatras ako ng paunti-unti. Humakbang rin siya papalapit at hinuli ang aking palapulsuhan. Mas lalo akong kinabahan."W-what are you doing?!" natataranta ko ng tanong. Malamig ang pawis na nasa noo.Why is he acting like this? Hindi ba noong huli naming pagkikita parang nandidiri siya at hindi niya ako kilala? Bakit ganito ang inaasta niya ngayon?I would have continued to fight for us until my last breath. I would have gone against all logic and rationale and found a thousand reasons why we shouldn't have to part. I would have stood, unfazed, and stared any challenge straight in the eye, refusing to cower in defeat. I would have gladly given up any material possession I had or sacrificed everything in my power to stay with him. I would have geared up for the biggest battle of my life, where failure wasn't an option and he were the only prize I needed.But alas, I cannot win against an immovable heart and a dying relationship that's bey
"Mama! Mama!" Nang imulat ko ang mga mata ko ay natanaw ko ang anak 'kong patalbog-talbog sa kama. Hindi ko pa maaninag ang ilaw sa labas. Madilim pa sa buong kwarto at tanging lamp shade lang ang nagbibigay ng ilaw sa amin. Ang aga-aga pa! Anong oras na ba?"Alu, stop that! Mama is still sleepy!" Biyernes na ngayon at may pasok pa ako mamaya. Ayaw 'kong pumasok nang puyat at pagod. My next days went fine. I am thankful that I have not seen Lazarus since that day. Mabuti naman. Siguro ay naging epektibo ang pagdedeny ko at pagdededma sa mga pangungulit niya. I rubbed the blanket over my face and turned to lie down. Alu still didn't stop, he's now at the top of my head, jumping."Mama! Mama! Wake up! Mama!""Alu, stop that and just sleep! Mama has work later, please!"Natigil naman ito at kahit medyo hirap pa ako sa pagmulat ng mata dahil sa antok, nakita ko ang pagsimangot nito. Yumakap ito sa akin at siniksik ang mukha sa leeg ko."I'm sorry, Mama. Alu is just hungry. Alu wants
"Hindi kita type!"Mariin at puno ng diin 'kong pagkakasabi. I tried to pull back my hand that he holds, but he just tightens his grip on it.We are in a secluded part of the hallway. There wasn't much students going out or passing by because the class was still on-going."Kailangan ko pa bang maging keyboard para maging type mo ako?"He winked at me while his mouth was still slightly open, his tongue stays on the side of his lips."Gago.""Gago-win ko ang lahat makuha lang ang puso mo." he said and then a small smile played on his lips.I almost vomit on what he said. Jesus christ, this is making me crazy! I wanna choke him to stop him from saying disgusting things!"Wag kang umasa! Wala akong interest sayo!" he immediately frowned after he heard what I said."Kailangan ko pa bang mangutang sayo para magkaroon ka ng interest sa akin?" Muntik akong mabuwal sa kinatatayuan ko nang marinig iyon sa kanya. Natawa siya sa reaksyon ko dahilan para lumuwag ang pagkakahawak niya sa akin."Oh
"Mommy where is Alu?" I asked, still a bit sleepy.When I woke up Alu was no longer beside me. Today is saturday, I woke up late because I couldn't sleep last night. Lumapit ako sa aking nanay para makapagtimpla ng kape. Nagluluto ito ngayon ng almusal namin. Tinanaw ko pa ang sala para hanapin ang anak ko pero wala talaga ang batang makulit doon."He went outside with his nanny. Ang sabi'y mageexercise daw sila." Kakainom ko palang ng kape at nang marinig ang sinabi ni Mommy ay muntikan 'kong maibuga iyon dahil gusto 'kong matawa. Mukhang sineseryoso talaga ng anak ko ang pagddiet!"Saan daw sila pupunta?"I grabbed my starbucks mug and head straight to the breakfast nook, overlooking the garden in front of the house. It's very relaxing to look at."Baka nasa park." Mommy answered. "Bakit 'di ako sinama?"Wala namang pasok at saka tanda ko nung isang araw niya pa ako nito kinukulit na samahan ko daw siyang magexercise. Akala ko dito lang sa bahay at konting stretching lang, hind
"Who put this here?" I asked in a low voice. There was a sunflower on my desk. I asked my co-teachers who were still there but they just shrugged. "We don't know. When I arrived, it's already there." I just nodded."How sweet! You have a suitor, Amira? Who is it? Or is it from our students?" our department head asked.My forehead creased. Mabilis na napailing. I picked it up and read the note that was written; it was written in a cursive form handwriting. Nahahalimuyak ang mamahaling pabango sa bulaklak. Pamilyar ang amoy.'you look lovely when you smile, have a nice day ahead'Tinignan ko ang likod nito pero walang nakalagay kung kanino galing. Pinagkibit-balikat ko nalang iyon, iginilid ito para makapaghanda na sa panibagong araw. Late na din kasi ako at wala rin naman akong vase kaya iginilid ko nalang kahit na medyo agaw pansin pa rin ito.My morning went well. Sunod-sunod ang klase ko at walang bakante. Nahuli pa akong magpalabas bago maglunch dahil nagpa-exam. Ayos lang din
"Tigil na natin ito. Bumalik na kayo sa akin..." tears finally fell down on his cheeks."Shit..." He quickly wiped away his tears and laughed a little. His bloodshot eyes darted on me. My head swam with half-formed regrets."I-I'm sorry, I just... I just miss you. All I want is to get back to everything." My heart felt as if my blood had become tar as it struggled to keep a steady beat. I can feel his pain but I was left speechless. He avoided his gaze at me. He slightly looked up to prevent his tears from flowing. Just a little longer and I'll give it up. I thought I was the only one hurting between the two of us. I thought he had lost his hope. Biglang may pumihit ng seradula ng pinto. Aabutin ko na sana ang pisngi niya para patahanin ito pero naalarma ako. Nataranta at agad na lumayo sa kanya. Biglang pumasok si Queenie na nagtatakang nakatingin sa amin. Mabuti nalang at nakalayo na ako kay Lazarus. Ang lakas ng kalabog ng puso ko. Parang lalabas ito sa dibdib ko."What is hap
I held my lower lip with my thumb. Natulala at hindi pa rin maproseso ang nangyari. He closed his eyes as he swallowed hard. Napasandal siya sa barandilya, doon humanap ng suporta."Let's go. My head is spinning." he finally said after some minutes. He then pulled my hand. Dire-diretso ang lakad namin hanggang sa makalabas na kami ng bar. Agad kaming dumiretso sa mga nakahilerang kotse."H-how about Maureen? How can she go home?" sa wakas ay natanong ko na rin."I'm pretty sure she's with my friend by now. Stop worrying about her. Let's go." sagot niya habang naglalakad pa rin."How about her car? What will she use? Did you bring your car with you how-""If you will not stop asking I will kiss you again."He said looks threatening. I bit my lower lip to stop myself from saying something. His forehead twitched while his eyes focused on my lips.Napaiwas ito ng tingin. He swallowed hard, gumalaw ang adams apple nito habang inililibot ang mga mata sa mga kotseng nakaparada."Where's her