"Oh Steph," I rubbed her arm, "I'm so sorry, I didn't know."There were tears in her eyes. "Normally I'd just laugh it off, but life isn't like high school anymore.""Was Troy your first?""God no," she replied, wiping her eyes and chuckling. "I cashed in my V card on prom night, like most red-blooded American girls. Didn't you?"I looked down at my hands. "No, I've still got mine. That's why BF calls me VV. I figured everyone knew.""Wait." She gave me a penetrating look. "Are you telling me you've never been with anyone?""Is that really so weird? I just haven't found the right person." The mental image of John carrying me to my bed blew through my thoughts and left me twisted around inside. "Oh God," I whispered and shut my eyes."Are you okay?"The pain cleared my mind as I wrung the skin of my arm under the table. "I just remembered something, never mind. So why did Troy say those horrible things about you?"Steph sat back and took a big sip of her coffee. "He couldn't finish the
"Well, what time do you want to meet up here on Saturday?""At three o'clock, right here," I replied, but I had to force the words out."Good. Tell John I can't wait to meet him!" she said, squeezing my arm in a friendly way, but the bruises I'd left caused me to wince."I will. See you later, Steph," I said. When she'd walked off toward the exit, I made my way to the arts and crafts store where Mom worked.As I walked through the store looking for Mom, the coffee and lack of real food made my stomach cramp. As the manager of the whole store, she could be anywhere. I nodded to the staff members I recognized until one pointed in Mom's direction. I found her speaking to a woman about a sewing machine. Mom smiled at me over the customer's shoulder, so knowing it could be a while I browsed around the craft aisles until she was free."Kate! Where's John?""Home. Can I get a ride home with you?""How'd you get here?" she asked and gave me a quick hug."Steph and Holly.""Did you remember to
There was silence for two seconds and then John burst out laughing. It was his bubbling laugh that finally broke the dark spell over me. I had to loosen up, just like Steph said. I needed to be willing to make a mistake or two. I looked up at his laughing face and felt him lift me out of that dark place I'd been all day. Before long, I was laughing along with him.The infectious laughter spread and soon Mom started laughing, too. When we'd all calmed down a bit, John said, "Wait, wait. I don't mean to ask even more embarrassing questions, but I have to know. I understand how a little boy could pee on a plant, but how does a little girl do that?"Mom gave me a look that said you're on your own. "I had to be about four at the time and wore dresses with little cotton panties. I took off my panties and just ... squatted over the plant."That set him off again. Mom and I laughed more at his reaction. He finally had to cover his eyes so he couldn't see me anymore. "Oh God, I can't look at y
By the time I was out of the shower, Mom was up with John in the kitchen. I was still suffering from cramps, but they weren't as bad as some months. When I joined them, Mom was beaming."John's going to stay with us!" she said hugging him so long his face turned red."Good." I smiled as though I hadn't already known. He handed me a cup of coffee with sugar and a big dollop of cream already in it. "Thanks.""I don't go into work until noon, do either of you have any laundry to do? I'm going to put in a load or two.""I've got a few things. Let me grab the hamper from my room." By the time I got back, John and Mom had sorted piles in the middle of the living room floor. I put my hamper next to Mom and whispered, "I've got some stains I need to spray.""Just put them in, I'll take care of it." Mom gave me a wink. "Do you need any cash?""I'm good for now," I said as I grabbed my book bag and hugged Mom. "Are you closing tonight?""Yes, so don't wait up for me. Just leave me some leftover
I squirmed in my chair and tried not to grin. "Stop it, seriously.""You have to tell me something! You can't just drop that on me and leave it at that." She picked up a fry and tore it apart, eating the bites with a grin."There's nothing to tell. I have no idea what's going on at this point.""So don't give me any details. Just give me a broad outline, between you and me. I won't tell a soul." She raised her eyebrows twice at me and nodded to encourage me.I was seriously tempted. I really needed to talk to someone about it, and since Jules was away I didn't really have anyone else. I shot for vague. "Okay, there's this guy, super sweet, and he makes me think naughty thoughts. That's all." Even as I said it, I could feel the heat rising to my cheeks."Have you told him?"I hesitated, but my nervous expression gave her the answer before I even said it. "Yes.""What did he say?""He likes me." I still couldn't believe it, but just remembering it made my eyes water. "But I'm scared to
"It doesn't look likely at this point.""Good. I thought about you all day.""What did you think about?" I pulled the blanket up and settled back into the couch.He blushed. "I find you very attractive, but if that was all it was, I wouldn't have said anything. You confuse me sometimes, but I like the mystery so far. There's strength in you that I didn't expect at first. You seem to know what you want in life and you work hard at school.""Of course I'm strong. How did I manage to fight the men off all these years?" He chuckled, but I was curious about his comment. "Why didn't you really think I was strong?""I don't know, I just misjudged you, I guess. You seemed tense and irritable, but then when you warmed up it was like I'd known you my whole life. I loved playing Wii with you. Even though we both know you're better than me at Mario Kart, you played along with me pretending otherwise.""That was fun. That's when I started feeling things, at least until I caught you staring at my c
"So you'd like me to help you learn?" His face was red now, too."Yes! I feel safe with you. I don't know why, but I really like you. I just have no idea what I'm doing." I leaned forward and took his hand. "I'm fascinated by your body and curious about your mind, but I want to know your heart, too. If I'd just wanted someone to fuck me, I could have let that happen a hundred different times. I want something more than that. Does this make any sense?""Yes, I feel the same way, and I'm sorry if I moved too fast the other night."I squeezed his hand and let it go, leaning back against the couch. "That was perfect, though. I'm the one that messed that up when I freaked out. I want to do more after my girl issues are gone.""How long will that be?""Usually five days.""For the record, periods don't bother me. It's not a fetish or anything, but it doesn't freak me out," he said casually, then picked up his tablet and swiped his unlock code."I'd like to wait, though. I can't imagine my f
across my mons. My legs parted and I pushed myself against his hand while my own fingers gripped his arm again to guide him. "Yes," I whispered.When his slick fingers moved my lips apart and slipped inside me, my whole body shuddered. I couldn't close my eyes or look away from his face, I just kept thinking, he's going to be inside me. He traced around between my lips, making me arch my back and when he slowly slipped a single finger all the way in, I cried out, "Yes! Oh, God, yes."He made a small circular motion with his thumb just above my lips. I was frozen until I got used to the sensation. He watched as I relaxed, licking his lips. "Slower," I whispered and released my death grip on his arm. "That's it. Just like that. Don't stop. Please."His finger moved inside me massaging in the opposite direction from his thumb on the outside. I released the breath I'd been holding in as a shuddered moan. Then I began to chant, "Yes, yes, yes..."The tempo was slow and easy, no more than a