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114

She let out a long labored breath, and I closed my eyes, wanting to block out her voice, wanting to avoid the ending where this conversation inevitably led, but not able to cover my ears or shut off the machine. I had to keep listening, as horrible as it was to hear. I had to know all of it.

“This isn’t a blue raincoat call.” How ironic was it that the safe word she’d made for me had only ever been used by her? “You’ll get this when it’s too late to do anything to help me. Honestly, it was probably too late for you to help me when we met. But maybe that’s why I loved you so much – because you didn’t try. You didn’t try to fix me or take me back home or tell me that my life was on a downward spin. You only wanted to make me happy. I think you’re the only person who ever really did. I’m sorry it was such an impossible task.

“And now it’s my turn to return the favor. If I can’t have Reeve, there isn’t anyone else I’d want him to be with except you. I just can’t be around to see it happen
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