53. How I Learned to Hate Myself

~ JESSE ~

The couple weeks after the claiming were some of the most confusing and unsteady of my life.

In the days immediately following that harrowing night, I was dragged to several meetings in which my duties as Queen and the ways I would need to be trained were discussed.

Time and again, with different audiences each time, my education, intelligence, and physical strength—or lack thereof—were discussed in perfunctory tones and analyzed with a ruthless eye. Cazz would list my deficiencies in a way that, had they been spoken with any tone at all, would have felt like he had nothing but contempt for me. Yet, he seemed… unconcerned. Listing off my failings like they were merely points on a board to be identified and then crossed off.

To hear him speak about it, these were simply the challenges of mating a human—I would be educated. I would be trained. And my physical weakness would be protected for me.

He didn’t curl up his lip in a sneer when he mentioned the fact that I hadn’t gone