LeilaIt was earlier than usual that I was out of the house, but I had a coffee date. I had texted Kami last night, asking her if she could meet me. I needed advice from a neutral party. I felt like I was sinking fast and I needed her to throw me a lifeline. I was on the fence and needed her to push me one way or the other.I felt discombobulated. Like nothing was right. Everything was all jumbled. I wasn’t in the same predicament as Christopher, but we were both facing challenges. Challenges that stemmed from us being together. I knew the quick and easy solution, but I didn’t like it. I wanted Kami to tell me what to do. I didn’t want to make the decision.I ordered my coffee and a strawberry and cream cheese Danish before taking a seat next to the window. I sipped my coffee, staring out at nothing. I saw Kami pass by and a second later a cool breeze flooded the shop. She sat down across from me a minute later with an iced coffee and her own Danish.“You look a little rough,” she com
Leila“Good morning,” I greeted Dean Johnson confidently.“Come on in.”I tamped down on the butterflies in my belly. I wasn’t going to let him see how terrified I was. I schooled my features, keeping a smile on my face as I sat down, daintily crossing my legs and waiting for him to speak.“Thank you for coming in today,” he started. “I was hoping we could have a conversation about what I saw yesterday.”“What did you see yesterday?” I asked innocently.He cleared his throat. “The embrace in your office.”“Embrace?” I asked, wrinkling my nose. “The hug I gave a man who was struggling with something very private and very big? I always have an open door with my students. They know they can talk to me about things going on in their personal lives as well as questions about a class. Aren’t we supposed to be there for our students? Didn’t you recently hold a meeting and encourage us to be mentors and sources of support for our students?”He nodded. “I suppose I did, but I don’t know what I
ChristopherI had decided to go home before meeting Leila for dinner. I wanted to check in with Olin and test the waters. I had almost told Leila I couldn’t meet her for dinner but figured I had better have a conversation with her.I heard the door open and close and sent up a silent prayer that he was in a better mood. He came into the kitchen and dropped his backpack on the counter before tossing his keys on top of it. His body language was telling me he was still pissed.“How was school?” I asked.“Fine.”“Did you get a chance to talk to Jen?”He scoffed. “Why would I talk to her?”“Because you like her and want to find out where she’s at,” I answered.He rolled his eyes. “I don’t care where she’s at. She can keep seeing the other guy. I don’t care.”“You sure about that?”“Yes.”I took a breath. “I have a dinner tonight. I’ll be home by nine.”“Bringing your newest lady home?” he sneered.“No. We’re having dinner.”He shook his head. “Sure. Whatever. Should I run out and buy anoth
ChristopherLeila’s eyes shone. “It was good. I went in there cool, calm, and collected. I was confident and stood my ground. I felt like I was facing a tiger, something I had been terrified of for too long. God, it felt good!”“Good for you,” I told her. “I knew you had it in you. You have this meek, quiet persona, but deep inside, you’re a lioness.”Her shoulders went back. “I did feel like a lion. A roaring lion. A respectful, quiet lion, but roaring nonetheless.”“Did he ask about me?” I asked, knowing I was likely the topic of conversation.“He did,” she answered, but didn’t seem bothered by it.“And did you tell him about us?”She grimaced. “Not exactly. He doesn’t need to know. I don’t feel like what we are doing is wrong. I am entitled to a personal life. Not everything I do has to be public knowledge. He’s not my father, even if I get the feeling he thinks he is. I’m an adult and I can make my own decisions.”“Wow. That’s a change and good for you. Seriously, you look like yo
LeilaI could just go home, I told myself. I could take a left at the light and never hear what he had to say. That wasn’t exactly mature, and it wouldn’t prevent him from saying what he had to say at some point, but I could put it off.Putting it off didn’t make it go away. I had messed with the guy’s head one too many times. I had tried to be honest with him from the very get-go, but it wasn’t enough. He was not the kind of man that had to wait around for a woman. He was handsome and successful and wealthy. There would be many women lining up to sink their claws into him.I should have seen the prize I had right in front of me instead of diddling around and freaking out about the stupid dean. If only I would have grown some damn balls a week ago. I could have saved whatever it was we had a week ago.I couldn’t now. I knew it as certain as I knew the sun would rise tomorrow.I parked my car in the spot next to Christopher’s truck in front of the marble slab creamery. I had told him I
Leila“I mean, he had his moments, but honestly, I didn’t spend that much time with him. I often ask myself if I’m seeing all the crankiness because I’m not working and I’m with him a lot more. Maybe he’s always been like this and I just never noticed. Carlie must have been dealing with a lot.”I offered a smile. “I once read that kids were little terrors when they were around their moms. They’d be little angels at daycare or school and then get home and act like something out of the Exorcist. They acted out with their moms because that’s where they felt safe. They knew their mothers would always love them. They trusted their mom to help them get through all their ugly emotions and feelings. In Olin’s case, he doesn’t have a mom. He has you. You are his safe space.”He chuckled. “I feel like I’m his hell. Coming through the door and seeing me waiting for him is his own version of hell.”“I don’t think so. I think he needs you more than he realizes. He’s lost and confused.”He let out
ChristopherI stepped out of the shower and wrapped a towel around my waist. Usually, a shower made me feel alive. It was like getting an infusion of the strongest coffee. Not today. I had thought long and hard about skipping class. I didn’t want to get out of bed. I didn’t want to face life. I just wanted to stay in bed with the blankets pulled up to my chin.The world felt darker today than it had in a really long time. The way I was feeling was very reminiscent of how I had felt in the weeks after Carlie’s death. I had felt so empty and alone. I didn’t realize how much I had come to count on the little texts from Leila before we went to bed each night or how good it felt to have another adult to talk to.In many ways, saying goodbye to Leila was a lot like losing another person I cared about. I wasn’t sure if it was better or worse that I would be able to see her on occasion. It would be like rubbing salt in a wound. I couldn’t have her. I couldn’t pop over to her classroom and tal
ChristopherI finished the coffee and checked the time. I frowned when I realized it was about ten minutes later than my normal time. I must have missed Olin coming downstairs I thought. I had been so lost in thought I didn’t hear the usual door slams or the stomping through the kitchen. I went back inside and noticed there was nothing in the kitchen to indicate he’d even come down to grab his usual frozen waffles.I shook my head. “Dad fail number one thousand and one,” I muttered under my breath. I grabbed my keys, phone and books and headed for the garage.I opened the door and frowned. Olin’s car was still in the driveway. It explained why I hadn’t heard him come down or leave. “Shit,” I muttered, realizing he had overslept.I left my briefcase with my books by the door and jogged upstairs and knocked on his bedroom door. “Olin! Olin, you’re going to be late,” I hollered.I waited a minute before knocking again. “Olin, come on. You need to get up and get a move on. I’ll go get you