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Chapter 42: Forever (Matthew)
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The Depth of Fate Chapter 43: Freedom (Audra)
“You’re sure?” I ask Dr. Milos.“Positive. Your QUANT draw indicates you’re around 5-6 weeks. I want to see you back in 4 weeks for an ultrasound since we don’t know the date of your last period. We will confirm gestational age then.” She says before going over a list of supplements she wants me to start taking. I’m glad she’s giving me a written list because I am hearing her speak but nothing is registering. I feel the anxiety forming a knot in my stomach. How could I have been stupid enough to let this happen? The drive home felt like an eternity. Despite being pregnant with Matthew’s baby, the only person I could think about was Simon. Why am I thinking about Simon? Oh right. Because I’m a fucking idiot and slept with him. My birth control implant often made me skip periods so I didn’t even think twice about it. But then my dumb ass had to go and forget to have it replaced when it expired four months ago. I hadn’t had a period in at least 3 months. SHIT. This means there’s a
The Depth of Fate Chapter 44: Broken (Matthew)
“I’m pregnant.”Audra’s words echo in my mind over and over, flooding my mind with panic and images of Lydia lying in my arms, covered in her own blood. Images of my son barely clinging to life while machines help him breathe. The image of the nurse wheeling my son’s body in on a cooling cot so I can say goodbye even though he was already gone. Words escape from my lips and I don’t even recognize the person saying them. The things I say are ruthless. As I bring my hands up and run my hands through my hair, Audra is suddenly on the floor in the fetal position and covering her face and head. I don’t understand what’s happening. The confusion converts my fear and anger into concern. I crouch down beside her and gently lift her up into my arms. Her breathing is rapid and she is shaking in terror. “Why are you shaking?” I ask softly. Whatever just happened has clearly triggered something within her. I hold her tightly and just rock with her until I can feel her body relax. I give her
The Depth of Fate Chapter 45: Investigation (Matthew)
Nightmares plague me all night. Every time I close my eyes, I’m reliving my trauma with Lydia; except when I look at my wife laying on the gurney covered in her own blood I see Audra’s face. I finally give up on trying to sleep and quietly walk down to my office. I’m not sure that working will be a big enough distraction but I’m willing to try anyway. I’m four pages deep into a huge embezzlement investigation when I hear a buzz. I look around and hear it again, this time my eyes landing on Audra’s purse that’s still sitting on my coffee table. It buzzes 3 more times before I get up to see if it’s possibly someone or something urgent. I unlock her phone to see 6 missed calls and 2 messages from someone named Simon Park. I open the messages and quickly read them. “Hey, are you awake? Can we talk?” From 1:24am.“Give me a call when you wake up.” From 2:13am. Who is Simon? She’s never mentioned Simon before. Audra has never given me a reason to distrust her, but her past with Tyle
The Depth of Fate Chapter 46: Anesthesia (Audra)
I can hear voices but nothing is making any sense. Everything sounds muffled like I’m under water. I want to open my eyes but my eyelids feel like they weigh a thousand pounds. I try to swallow but my throat is dry. The voices and sounds start to become less muffled. Is someone saying my name?“Audra. Audra honey, can you hear me?” Whose voice is that? What is that incessant beeping sound? What the hell is on my face?!I eyes suddenly pop wide open and my hands fly up to my face. “Hold on honey, we need to leave the oxygen mask on. Can you look at me, Audra?”I look around and see fluorescent lights, medical equipment, and a nurse. Suddenly the smell of disinfectants hit me and I feel sick. “Audra I need to you relax and take some deep breaths for me.” This nurse sounds familiar but my head feels fogged and I can’t place who she is. I take several deep breaths before asking her where I am and what is going on. “You’re at the hospital. You just had surgery. Is there anyone in the
The Depth of Fate Chapter 47: Starry Night (Audra)
The late evening sun casts a soft glow over everything while I stare out the window toward the river. Butters jumps up on the chair next to me, letting out a chirp to greet me before he pushes his head into my hand and climbs into my lap. Matthew would be home from the office soon. The last week has been overwhelming and emotionally taxing. We haven’t spoken much. We aren’t going out of our way to avoid each other but he knows I need space right now if we are going to get through this. If I didn’t need to stay close to the hospital, I would’ve gone to Lexi’s. She stayed with us for a few days after I was discharged but needed to go back to work. I miss having her here. I hear the door open and close. Matthew is home. I hear his footsteps behind me and expect to hear him go upstairs but instead I hear him approach me. He sits next to me on the big white couch and takes my hand in his. I’m tired of resisting my feelings and I lean over into his side. I’m tired of trying to decide
The Depth of Fate Chapter 48: Homeward Bound (Simon)
I toss back a second shot of tequila and wince slightly as it burns on the way down. I push my shot glass to the edge of the bar and flag down the bartender for another. I am done with classes until fall and I plan to head back to Minnesota for the summer. I should be resting before I start my long drive tomorrow but all I can think about is the hollow feeling in my chest I get every time I think about going back. I was an idiot and pushed Audra away. I finally had my chance with her and I blew it because I panicked like I always do. She was willing to come be with me wherever I go and instead of embracing it, I told her to find someone else. After everything she went through with Tyler, I naively thought she would just stay single and wait until I graduate. I scroll through my Facebook newsfeed and a news article from the Star Tribune catches my eye. It is from the recent charity gala. There is a slideshow of photos from the event. For curiosity’s sake, I scroll through and see m
The Depth of Fate Chapter 49: All Clear (Audra)
A rumble of thunder rouses me from my slumber. I roll from my back to my belly and sleepily gaze toward the middle of the bed but see that it is empty. The thunderstorm outside makes it unusually dark in the room and I’m not sure what time it actually is. I grab my phone from my nightstand and see that it’s 7:45am. Matthew is already on his way to the office if he hasn’t already arrived. I grumble and wrap myself back into my cocoon of soft down and close my eyes again. Moments later, Butters jumps onto the bed and walks up the length of my body before stopping to sit right between my shoulder blades. He purrs loudly for a minute before he takes a paw and starts to gently bat at the edge of the blanket next to my face. He meows softly and then bats at me again, slightly more aggressively this time. “Alright, fine.” I groan as I roll over and push him and the blankets off of me. I follow him downstairs to the kitchen and I pour food into his bowl. I make a mental note to look into
The Depth of Fate Chapter 50: Trust (Matthew)
It’s been a little over a month since Audra and I have had sex. I know I need to let her heal properly and keeping my hands to myself has been excruciating. I came home from work early with the intention of helping myself relieve some tension. I close the door to my office since Lita is here. Before I can turn on my computer, my phone pings. It’s Dave texting me to let me know he emailed the file for the background check I asked for. I abandon my plan for self love and open the file. Simon Thomas Park. Born April 27, 1996. Only child. Lived in Spring Valley, WI. Currently lives in Burlington, VT. No criminal record. No children. Not married. This guy is as basic as it gets. So who is he to Audra and why is he contacting her? Digging further into the file I see they attended the same high school but didn’t attend the same college. There’s really not much that connects them. I open the attached photos. One is of Audra and Simon together in front of a large body of water in the midd
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