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Conflict

Dear diary, I am a little relieved but at the same time I am a little concerned. I am glad that Leon asked me for divorce. Had I asked him, he would have said no. Anyways it is a little concerning that why am I concerned about it.

It was all I wanted since I got married to him. It is not hidden to either of us that our marriage means nothing. It means nothing to me, it means nothing to him. We had no choice when we got married. It was the only time he was kind to me.

He did me a favour. I am glad that he did. But at the same time I am not. I would have found a way all by myself, maybe.

I know why there is this conflict in my heart. I hate to admit but I have feelings for him. I can try to hide it, I can try to pretend but that won't make the feelings go away.

There was a part of me that believed I can change him. I know that this feeling always gave me pain. I want to hate him but still I want to be with him even after what he did to me yesterday.

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