42: BRAND NEW

I awake slowly, blinking and staring up at the hotel room ceiling that’s now starting to look as familiar as the one back in my dorm.

The first thing I feel is the bitterness in my throat and the heavy sadness in my chest. Memories of the previous day slip back into my mind like unwanted phantoms. The parts of myself I’d kept glued together had come apart; shattered, in the rain. My tears had turn hysterical fast, and William had been there, asking me what was wrong and then holding me close as I wailed, once he realized I was far from being able to form coherent words.

The pain of the accident, of losing my father, of my family being fractured beyond repair, had felt raw and fresh yesterday. But it was beyond just that. I’d cried because I was sad, because I was confused, and angry, and happy to be alive. The silver could’ve killed me, but it didn’t. I’d survived a tragedy once, and I’d blamed myself for being alive after it, but then I’d survived a second time, and I realized that s