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Chapter 4

After finishing organizing the papers, I took my bag. I wasn't planning to look at Oxem again, but our eyes met, and I couldn't resist. On the other side, he was sitting, but his gaze was still fixed on me, even though he was talking to Peter. I felt more flustered when he stood up and started walking towards me.

"Done?" he asked.

"Ahm… yeah. I should probably go ahead. They seem to be enjoying their conversation. I won't bother them. Where's Auntie? I'll say goodbye."

Mang Kiko and I followed him inside the house to bid farewell to his mother. Yeshua just waved goodbye to me as I left. It seemed like they weren't planning to go home yet because they still had many stories to share. I wonder where they're getting all those topics?

Inside, we saw Auntie fixing things in the kitchen. She looked at us when Oxem called her.

"Why don't you stay for lunch?" Auntie asked. "I'm cooking for the kids. There's plenty, and they might not be able to finish it all."

I forced a smile before replying, "No, thank you. I need to say goodbye before lunchtime."

She nodded, accompanying me outside. She saw our car where Mang Kiko was waiting.

"Thank you for accommodating us, Auntie. And for allowing us to use the farm for our project."

"You're welcome, dear. You're Yeshua's friend, so I'm happy to help. Good luck with your project, okay?"

I thanked her again before turning to Oxem. I also expressed my gratitude for his help with our group. Thanks to him and Yeshua, our work on the farm was expedited. Although he wouldn't receive any grades from it.

"See you soon," he said.

I didn't know what that meant. I didn't understand why we needed to meet again. It's not like I'll be coming back here. It depends on whether it's necessary. But I think it's not. I made sure I double-checked the requirements.

Once inside the car, I breathed a sigh of relief. It felt like I'd been holding my breath for no apparent reason. I feel so exhausted. My social battery must have been drained.

I looked outside again and saw Oxem still watching our car. Even though I knew the windows were tinted, I still felt uneasy. It's as if he could see me from the outside.

I watched him through the side mirror until he disappeared from my sight. I don't know what's happening to me, but I feel tension. Every time our eyes meet, it's like all the air in my body is being sucked away. I feel suffocated for whatever reason.

It's a good thing we finished what we needed to do on their farm. It's unlikely that we'll see each other again, especially since our senior high school building is separate from the college students.

When I got home, I just sent lunch to my room. I wasn't in the mood to eat in the dining area. I have a table and chairs in my room, so I'll eat there. At least I can study while eating.

Midterms are approaching, so I need to focus. I need to excel in all our subjects. I'm sure my mom will check my report card after the exams. How can she not, considering she's friends with our adviser, Ma'am Ocampo? She knows everything about my school activities, even my friends. That's why she reacted that way when she found out I wasn't paying attention in class. She knows Yeshua is my friend, and she wants me to outperform her in everything. So, I'll do everything to make sure that doesn't happen.

The next day, our General Math teacher surprised us with a quiz. Many failed except for me. This is one reason why I study every day. We never know when our teachers will decide to give us a surprise exam. That's the difference between me and them.

After class, I headed straight to the parking lot. I need to study.

I stopped in my tracks when I saw Oxem in the parking lot. He was looking at me as if he had seen me leaving our building and had been watching me ever since.

I tightened my grip on the books in my arms. I didn't expect to see him so soon after our encounter yesterday. And here I thought I wouldn't see him again, at least not this early.

I approached him slowly because our car was near where he was standing. Was it really me he was waiting for? I mean, why would he?

"Hi there," he greeted. "We meet again."

I nodded. "Right. Sooner than I expected. Do you study here too?" I noticed he was in civilian clothes, so I couldn't tell if he was a student or just picking someone up.

"Yeah. First year of college." That explains the attire. College students are allowed to wear civilian clothes on Wednesdays and organization shirts on Fridays.

"I see." I averted my gaze because I didn't know what else to say. It's not like we're close. We've only met once, or twice if you count the incident at the milk tea shop.

"Are you heading home?" he asked.

"Yeah. And you?"

"I'm just going to pick up Yeshua. We're planning to eat out. Do you want to join us?"

My eyes widened slightly, but I quickly recovered. "I'm okay. I mean, it's a cousin's bonding thing. I don't want to intrude."

He chuckled lightly. "You won't be intruding. That's why I'm inviting you, right? It's okay to join. I don't think Yeshua minds either. You're friends, after all." He took out his phone from his pocket. "I'll just text her that I'm here."

He quickly typed a message, and I spoke up, "I really can't go. I'm sorry." He stopped typing and looked at me. "Not that I don't want to, but I need to study. Midterms are approaching."

He nodded slowly and put his phone back in his pocket. "I see. I understand. Next time, maybe? After your midterms."

I bit my lower lip. "I don't know," I whispered.

We stood in silence for a moment. I looked away due to embarrassment. Honestly, I wanted to go. I wanted to join Yeshua and him, even if I felt out of place. I didn't mind. I wanted to go and get to know him. Even though I knew I had nothing to say to him, at least I would learn more about him.

But I surely couldn't leave without my mom knowing where I was going. And she would definitely be angry again if she found out I went out instead of studying. She might even tighten her grip on me, and I might not be able to leave the house anymore.

"I need to go," I said. "Enjoy your bonding."

I turned away and walked straight to our car. Mang Kiko opened the door for me before I got in. I closed my eyes tightly so I wouldn't have the urge to look at Oxem again. Maybe if I saw him, my mind would change, and I'd forget about my mom's anger.

"Are you okay, Bivianne? Is something bothering you?"

I looked up at Mang Kiko. "I'm okay. Maybe I'm just hungry." Right. Hungry. My stomach has been twisting and turning since a while ago.

"If that's the case, let's go home. Cassady must have cooked something by now."

He started driving away. Just like before, I'd eat in my room while studying. Cassady would occasionally come back to bring me snacks and something to drink. I saw her entering my room, tiptoeing to avoid making noise. I could still hear her, though.

I couldn't help but laugh and shake my head at what she was doing. I'm just not in the mood to study right now. If it were a normal day, I wouldn't see or feel her presence at all. But I couldn't help but wonder what I'd be doing at this time if I agreed to join Yeshua and him.

Regret is slowly creeping in. I tried to focus on what I was reading to forget about what happened earlier. I was successful because I finished what I needed to study for the day.

The next day, I went to school early to study in the room. There might be more surprises or surprise quizzes, so it's better to be prepared.

But before I could even sit in my chair, Yeshua arrived wearing their varsity jersey. I rolled my eyes because I knew why she was there. She should already know my answer.

She took the seat in front of me since our classmates weren't there yet. "No need to look at me like that," she said. "I know you won't agree to play in our game. I just wanted to invite you to watch somehow. We got a temporary player, but it seems like she might disappear with just a gust of wind."

I chuckled. "Even if you managed to convince me, I'd just stand in the middle of the court. At least she'd try to play for you."

She took a deep breath. "So, will you come? So my stupid cousins won't get their hopes up for nothing. Don't worry; they're harmless. They just really want to get to know you, especially since they didn't talk to you much the other day. They didn't even know you were my friend."

I tried not to show that her words affected me. "Am I your only friend?"

"Unfortunately, yes."

I furrowed my brow. "What are you trying to say?"

"That we're both loners?" She laughed at her own words. "You know my only friends are the members of the futsal team, and there are only four of us. Besides, my cousins know them well, so they're curious when they found out I have another friend they didn't know much about."

I was stunned by what I was reading, but my attention was no longer on the book.

"So, will you come? So my cousins won't hope in vain. Don't worry. They won't take long. After you watch, you can leave. This is my last year in high school, and I won't be able to play in college. So it's a big deal if you watch."

I sighed. "Okay. I give up. I'll tell Mang Kiko that I'll be an hour late on the day of your game. Happy?"

"Yes!" she exclaimed. Our classmates looked at her. "That's a promise, okay? No backing out!"

"I don't back out once I've said something. You know that."

She happily hopped out of the room, while I smiled to myself. There's probably nothing wrong if I'm an hour late getting home. I can always extend my study hours until six in the morning.

But no matter how much I convince myself, I can't help but worry. Surely, my mom will be angry again with what I'm about to do.

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