I loathed those words as quickly as they left my mouth. Just hours ago, I struggled to keep away and pledged that I would never require or need someone as I did before. Now, I’m squatting on the cool tiled floor of my tiny one-bedroom apartment, expecting a man that had withdrawn himself from my life years ago.
“Please,” I urged. Begging time to run faster, praying for Liam to manifest in front of me.
“Dolores?” He sounded strange, but soon the noise quieted down, and the surrounding space seemed to open up. “Where are you?”
“At my place. My boyfriend is here. I ordered him to leave, and he’s trashing my bedroom. I can make out things breaking.” Knowing the sound of my voice sounds as terrified as I seem. I told him to come ready for anything that might happen and sent him my address in a quick message. I must have stayed inside the bathroom for the longest time until nothing else broke until he got tired.
The noises of the night filtered in, and I em
I'm honestly trying here, making my most exemplary attempt to control my mind, wondering towards the woman who now lives close by I can't understand one word from another. I can't comprehend the summary report I have opened in front of me, and no matter how many times I struggle to read the pie chart, it is just colored with numbers. I guess that the amount in blue means that all is running as steady as it would like. I will be in trouble next week at the quarterly meeting when it is time for me to add something relevant. Someone is going to have to explain this to me. I give up. On my feet once again, I can't control de urge anymore. Every 10 to 15 minutes, I have been checking on her, the last time she had finally fallen asleep, face stained with tears. She's just a little lump on my bed. Elevated by the pillows surrounding her, I can finally see how she looks like while she sleeps. There is no barrier anymore, nothing that stops me from getting closer. Back then,
I've secretly stolen something of his while he was in the room, oblivious to my doing. He was distracted, looking down at his phone while I took his worn shirt and pushed it all the way to the bottom of my small duffel bag. I couldn't quite believe my brazenness and quick actions, but the memento was already in my possession, and it scared me that he found out about it. The minute I sniffed it, my reaction was quicker than I thought. I just stole a dirty shirt, well not dirty it just smelled like him, a wood-like minty scent. All I can think of right now is my bag with a shirt that doesn't belong to me. I still had a chance to put it back. "Weren't you hungry?" I feel as if someone has let go of an elastic band on my brain. The return to reality is quite painful and unsettling. He is, after all, sitting in front of me, gazing at me with a frown. "I yes, sorry." "Go on then, eat, they brought that thing ages ago." He looks down at the untouched plate i
I'm in bed, his bed, the same bed that I had previously slept on before, but instead of a comfy mattress, all I felt was a rocky surface on my backside. I couldn't lay back and relax; I mean, he could come out any second and find me there, on the bed. His bed. After those words, he implied that I was his property and then forced me to head to the bathroom to prepare for bed. It all felt so weird. I had done it, and of course, I had tried not to, but he was a bully, a big and scary bully. I had a few more minutes until he was done since the water was still running, and then I started imagining him under the warm water; his chest wet, water rolling down his back and down in between his....fingers! JESUS. I couldn't even fantasize about him without my heart getting all wild and crazy. I needed something to keep myself busy, like a game or something. Looking around the room, I remembered I still had my phone. I could text someone, anyone. Lin was my first option as always, and I
"He really said that?" "Every single word. I'm telling you he's not playing around this time I had to bite my tongue to stop from screaming at the top of my lungs 'fuck me, fuck me hard'." "Go Westbrook!" "Oh please, you hate his guts." "I hate Beck's. Hold on." There's a bang and a crash; I place the phone back in my lap and tap the speaker option. Jameson is cooking, which means it is all messy but good. He is fantastic with meats but a disaster around the kitchen. They're arguing for a few moments. I considered hanging up, but then I remembered there it's not my minutes. She's the one who called me, so it's on her. I stare at my muted TV and think about the last few days. Is all vivid, the words, the smell, and his touch. I can't help but moan. "So, you have the shirt on?" "Nope," I exhale dramatically. "I'm saving it for later, I'm masturbating furiously tonight." "Fuck, that's hot and too much info by the way." I can hear
I love grocery shopping. I could do it for hours. Going around looking at the produce and making up dishes in my head in the middle of the night just browsing between the produce and cold meats, spices, and boxed treats take my head off so many things that have happened lately. I'm not the most incredible cook but with the internet is pretty easy to whip out all sorts of food. But thinking about that list that keeps shortening every single day of articles I can buy is nerve-wracking. I have plans later tonight after work to hit the small market for, there's no way I'm going to all you can stare and can't buy supermarket. It's too cruel for my poor heart and wallet. Learning to shop for the necessary was a hard thing but now, since I'm flying solo now and needed less food at home without beck kinda forced me to do it. I'm dreading paying the part of the bills; Beck helped to cover things like the electricity, food, and the internet since he stayed in all the time seemed reaso
"Dolores where the hell are you? Is almost one in the morning and I'm standing outside your apartment." What. The. Fudge. He was actually here. His high position made him travel more than anyone I knew. Constant meetings and stressful calls took most of his day; I knew it because I had once been with him, the amount of stress and the long nights without sleep. Waking up in the middle of the night, finding him locked up inside his office, talking to who knows what atwho knows where. He didn't realize it, but I stayed near him whenever I could, keeping him company while he worked, usually taking my computer to the hallway to go over some assignment. At the same time, he dived into some work that just couldn't be avoided. Those moments he knew nothing about I cherished and remembered with fondest. He had been silent all morning after saying that thing about me being home early to bed, but I stopped paying attention to his threats. It felt lik
How is it that my life is a series of unfortunate events that repeat themselves repeatedly? I don't even know I bother with life anymore. I'm not learning from 'these events' at all. My life is a mess as it is, but now you have thrown shame to it too. Are you even up there? I whisper to myself while looking up at the dark skies, like, give me a break, God, it is not like I'm trying to be shitty at it, but I would like a little bit of good for once in a while me. If bad things keep happening to me, like having my ex-boyfriend fucking on my bed with another woman, the sudden appearance of my forever crush, and now, I was broke. Oh, and we mustn't forget that Liam H. Westbrook is getting the first-row seat to me, revealing my chest. Don't get me wrong, I am very proud of them, but I'm not into just showing them to anyone. This isn't Mardi Gras, and we're not that intimate, at least not yet. I finally recovered from the shock a quickly covered myself moving away
Buzzing wakens me. Looking around, I find the source of the annoying sound. Opening one eye looking around for whatever it is that making it. I winced in pain, a pounding headache, and the soreness in my eyes when the sunlight shone right at my face. My phone is rattling on its charging nook; I don't think twice and reject the call. My head is pounding, my throat is dry, and my body feels like it weighs a ton. Why do I drink When I'm sure that I suck at being drunk. Trying to piece last night's events is a bit hard. The memories turn blurry on the dance floor. I know I danced and there was a lot of alcohol and dancing. How did I get here? God. Liam. He called and sounded angry. Turning around, I find myself face to face with the man, the little light coming into the room is enough to see him. His fa