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Forty Five
c a t h e r i n e
“You can’t do this. You need to calm yourself.” Vernon kept telling me as we rode the bus to Jackson’s neighborhood.
“Maybe you should meet him another time. Please, this is bad. Let your anger subside. Face him when you’re rational.”
“I am rational.” I made emphasis while restraining my anger.
Ironically, I could barely speak soft nor breathe subtly for my chest is heaving so hard with unshed fury. Even my fists were balled, my fingers were burying so deep in my palms I am sure it was wounding by the second.
I flinched when Vernon’s palm rested on top of my fists. He caressed it, leading me to relax.
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v e r n o n“What’s with the solemn face?” Mingyu shoved my arm.Disturbed from my reverie, I glanced at him with a scowl. It was early in the evening and we were playing basketball in a nearby court just outside our high school. Some of the late classes had just finished, and the teachers had already left too.Mingyu and I were practicing for our tryouts like usual. We sat on the bleachers to refresh ourselves, and for just a moment of rest, my mind instantly wandered to Catherine.“I was thinking about what might have happened to Cath..” I admitted after gulping from my water bottle.“Yea. That sucks.” Mingyu shook his head.I have a
Euphoria Forty Seven
v e r n o n“I don’t know about you, but my family can’t know I am using drugs!” Mingyu grunted in growing panic.I resumed putting on my shirt, and with a heavy sigh, decided not to worry about it for now. It is equally scary for me to be found out, but I could not be panicking right now too, especially that Mingyu’s going nuts over it. On top of that, I had Catherine waiting for me. That should take priority now.“I need to go, Mingyu. I’ll talk to you later.” I patted the taller guy’s arm and carried my duffel bag away.
Euphoria Forty Eight
v e r n o n"I can't do it." I protested as we stood outside our usual hideout.Together with JB and Mark, we waited on a hidden alley a few blocks away from our school. It's a vacant street that looked like a dumpsite, given the vacant establishments that stood along it. We had often come here and never for a good cause. We came here to smoke, to get high, and to pick fights."Snap out of your cowardice, dude! This is for us! For college!" Mingyu shoved my arm as he tried to make sense of this plan."We still can't get into college even if we get into the basketball team! Don't you think there wouldn't be any medical examinations before then? We would still be found as junkies. The moment we did this, we destroyed our fucking future!" I lost control and yelled back at
Euphoria Forty Nine
Forty NineCatherine insisted not to walk her home that night. So I remained on the bus as she went out for her stop. She waved at me despite her already heavy eyelids. She was tipsy. The soju bomb had taken a toll on her, I could tell that by her over talkativeness and hyperness. I have never seen her that way and it was too amusing.Despite the obvious tipsiness, she insisted several times that she could go by herself. According to her, she can manage. And I could never win an argument with her so I did not insist on accompanying her home.Back home, all the guys were present in the living room. Some trap music was blaring in the background as the weed smoke reeked in the tiny space. JB was on his computer seat; Mingyu on the sofa, and the two guys were sprawled on the floor. Bottles of beer and cigarette sticks lie with them.
Euphoria Fifty
v e r n o nI woke up still stoned the next day. But miraculously, I managed to make it early to class. I just took a couple of downers and I'm half-alive to function. I still felt like shit of course. My headache and fatigue is immeasurable but I pushed myself just so I could see Catherine.I texted Mingyu and asked if he'd seen Catherine or if she's in our class already but he said she isn't. So I waited outside the school's gate for about twenty minutes. I was only disturbed when I saw the gates slowly being closed by the school guard and by the discipline officer, Mr. Song. I cursed inwardly when I glanced at my clock. It's five minutes past 7 am and Catherine is still nowhere to be found.I was about to call her when my eyes found her running from a distance. Behind her are the other students running their life towards t
Euphoria Fifty One
v e r n o n"Cath." I called in a lower tone this time.She turned her head to me while her body remained frozen still."You know you can talk this out to me. So hold my hand and let's get down here huh?" I stretched my arm towards her.But instead of accepting it, she shook her head and looked down. The height must have startled her because her legs shook. My stomach turned as I watched her tried to keep her balance."No, no. Don't look down. That's something you wouldn't want to do. Look far away instead." I am going nuts by trying to keep her attention on me."You know, there's my favorite quote from Dead Poets Society…" I began blabbering.
Euphoria Fifty Two
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Euphoria Fifty Three
catherineAdam waited eagerly for what I had to say. Although hesitant, I began to tell him about Vernon because he's all I could think about."There's this boy.." My stomach was filled with butterflies just by beginning to talk about him."With a hair of gold, and eyes of caramel, and a million-dollar smile.." I grinned at the recollection of his once in a blue moon genuine smiles."And…" I sighed. "He's really nice to me. He's incomparable to everyone. He's like my angel, saves me at times of trouble, and he knows me personally more than anyone else does."Adam's forehead creased, as if the conversation was not pleasing him. Carried away, I did not mind that and I continued talking.
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