Chapter 7: When Youth Demands

YEAR 2015

"May laro raw ang 3rd year, Rowena! Manood tayo!" Tinakbo ko ang hallway ng building namin para lang hagilapin si Rowena. "Please! Samahan mo na ako, ililibre nalang kita mamaya!" I begged her.

Mukha namang wala na siyang magawa dahil binitbit ko na rin ang bag niya palabas. When we arrived at the court, dinig ko na agad ang hiyaw ng mga senior namin na nanonood. We aren't allowed here, for sure!

Pero ang sabi naman ay kung inimbita ka ng senior, you may enter and watch the game. This is their final practice para sa gaganaping liga sa susunod na linggo, Izo is one of this school's athlete.

He's a consistent MVP of our school's team.

No wonder his body's built like that. Kahit pa noong bata kami, talagang masculine na ang figure niya. I've always admired his physique, at halatang-halata iyon ngayon lalo na't kita ang mga braso niya sa suot niyang jersey.

I saw the number at the back of his shirt, it's 22.

I blushed. That’s my birthday, sinakto niya kaya iyon?

"Hoy! Siguraduhin mo lang na ililibre mo 'ko, ha?! Baka mamaya ay mahuli tayo rito, naku talaga! Isang outsider lang ang puwedeng ma-invite per game! Sinama-sama mo pa ako." Pabulong na sigaw ni Rowena.

Tumango-tango na lang ako at patuloy na nanood sa laro. Izo and I have been talking for 2 months now, and I can say that we have made progress. He's very caring despite being playful, he knows his priorities and is very patient with things.

Kailan ba siya manliligaw?

Pakiramdam ko ay atat na atat ako! Pero hindi ba't ganoon naman dapat? Sa mga nababasa at napapanood ko sa TV, nanliligaw na agad ang mga lalaki kapag gusto nila ang babae!

Kapag niligawan ako ni Izo, I don't think I'll last for a day! Sasagutin ko na siya agad! In that case, I can use him as a toy to raise my social status. Sikat siya sa mga senior, at kapag nabihag ko siya, malamang ay hahanga sila sa akin!

"Alam mo.. Hindi ko alam kung nag papanggap ka nalang bang ayaw mo kay Izo, o talagang nagugustuhan mo na siya.." Bagot na sabi ni Rowena.

"Ano ka ba! Paano ko siya mauuto kung aasta akong masungit, 'di ba? Ang mga kagaya niya, ang tipo ay yung mga pa-sweet na babae! Yung feeling nila mauuto nila!" Sabay irap ko. Well, unfortunately—I'm not like that.

Or so I thought...

Another month has passed, and slowly.. I feel like swallowing my own words. This is like playing with fire, a chase with the waves, and too bad for me—the waves seemed calm, but each push was filled with force.

Very treacherous.

Izo isn't known merely for his achievements in sports. He's part of our School's Student Government. Despite being in his 3rd year, he was elected as the President of the SSG, and is even considered overly-qualified due this exceptional performance in academics.

Hindi naman ako sobrang talino, but people say I'm above average. Compared to him, I could never compete.

He participates in numerous extracurricular activities. Minsan ay napapa-isip ako kung paano niya nahahati ang oras niya para sa akin at sa pag-aaral niya, kaya tuwing nangyayari 'yon ay pinipili kong bigyan siya ng oras, but whenever I do...

Something like this happens.

I saw him approaching me with his normal serious face. His hair was messy, halatang galing lang sa klase. "Are you avoiding me?" Iniwas ko ang tingin ko sa kaniya.

He's right.

These past few weeks, I'm choosing to ignore him. Natatakot ako, natatakot sa puwedeng mangyari. I'm new to this kind of feeling, I only saw this on TV and books, how can I tell?

Nagulat ako sa marahan niyang pag hawi ng buhok ko, he lifted my face wanting me to look at him. Iniwas ko ang tingin ko sa kaniya.

"Tingnan mo naman ako, Helena."

His voice was gentle, as if pleading for my attention. "I'm not avoiding you." Matigas kong sabi, trying to hide my vulnerability in front of him. I need to save my face, okay!

Kinuha niya ang monobloc chair na malapit at inilagay iyon sa harap ko. Umupo siya rito, he took a sigh before speaking.

"Are you mad? Did I do something wrong?" He asked.

Umiling ako. Wala naman talaga siyang ginawang mali, I'm just confused why is he acting this way when we initially agreed to play it all out... is he falling for me, as well?

I chuckled at that thought. Imposible!

"What's funny, Helena?" Kinagat ko ang ibabang labi ko at tiningnan siya sa mata. "Nothing, Izo... really. Everything's good, napansin ko lang na medyo packed ang schedule mo kaya hindi na ako nakikisingit."

Mukha naman siyang na-offend sa sinabi ko. "Hindi ka abala sa 'kin, Helena. Don't think of it that way. Oo at marami akong ginagawa, but that doesn't mean that you should avoid me!" Tama naman siya.

"I can make time for you, Helena! I can make time for us, okay?" He said, seriously convincing me to stop avoiding him.

Tumango na lang ako, alam ko namang hindi ako mananalo sa kaniya pag dating sa ganito. "Kanina pa tapos ang klase mo, why are you here?" Naningkit ang mata niya sa tanong.

"Well.. uhm, I'm.. bored." Sagot ko, syempre hindi 'yon totoo! Hinintay ko talaga siya dahil gusto ko sanang makita bago ako mag-pasundo. "Were you waiting for me, Helena?" Nanlaki ang mata ko sa sinabi niya.

"You should've texted me! Kanina pa ang dismissal niyo, paano kung hindi kita nakita agad?" Tumaas naman ang kilay ko sa sinabi niya. "I wasn't waiting for you, ano! I was just hanging around here!" Katwiran ko.

"Let's walk you home." Suhestyon niya. Walking distance lang mula rito ang entrance ng Rel Juana kaya walang problema kung mag lakad man kami. "Okay." Tumayo na ako.

Kukunin ko na sana ang sling bag ko nang unahan niya ako at isinabit iyon sa balikat niya. His hands found its way to my shoulders. "Tara na at baka gabihin tayo." When we arrived at the gates of Rel Juana, he gave me my bag.

"Paano ka uuwi? Wala nang masasakyan ngayon."

"I can handle, Helena. Pumasok ka na." He assured me. Sinunod ko iyon at bumungad sa akin ang nag liligpit na mga workers sa loob, nginitian ko sila at pumasok sa mansion. Lumingon ako sa gate, he was still there.

Kumaway ako sa kaniya, he waved back.

"I think I'm falling, Izo." I whispered in the air. Nang makitang nakapasok na ako sa loob, tumalikod na siya at nag lakad palayo. I got my phone out of my bag and texted him.

Helena:

ingat, text me when you get home ;)

Izo:

I'm on the way home, eat your dinner.

I was shocked that he replied after a few minutes. Sagad ngiti kong kinagat ang manok na ulam ko. "Iha, how's school?" My Lola asked. "Okay naman po!"

"Mhm." Malisyosang saad niya. "These past few days, may nakakapagsabi sa aking malapit daw kayo ng anak ni Senior Izo." Ngumiti na lamang ako at hindi sumagot.

"Basta, Juana... aral muna at 'tsaka na 'yang pag mamahal na iyan, darating din ang araw para riyan, ija. Huwag mag madali." I nodded as a response, she's right. I shouldn't think about this too much! Siguro'y may pina-plano naman si Izo para sa amin.

Kinabukasan, I arrived at school early. This is the official game of our school's basketball team. Excused kami sa isa naming period at pinayagang manood ng laro dahil sa court namin ito gaganapin.

To support our school, we prepared a small token of appreciation. Pins, headbands, ballers at mga banners. Malayo pa lang ay rinig na ang mga sigawan, lalo na ngayon dahil opisyal na gagananapin na ang laro.

I was wearing my usual uniform, a body-fit top with long navy green skirt. I tied my hair up, I did my make up today. I wanted him to see me! I didn't bother the looks I received when we entered the court.

Malamang ang kalahati no'n ay galing sa mga taga hanga ni Izo, at ang kalahati'y sa mga nakaka-kilala sa akin.

Rumors have spread around the campus, na nag bunga raw ang pangungulit ko at napilitan lamang si Izo na pansinin ako. After all, I was the only Escarzega heiress and it's all because of family business.

I don't believe it.

Izo's not like that, he's full of honor and a good follower of his principles. Kapag ayaw niya ang isang bagay, hindi niya ito gagawin. Umupo ako malapit sa unahan, the bleachers were full of people.

Nang mag simula ang laban, mas lalong umingay sa loob. I became one of those girls who's screaming their lungs out! Why not? This is for our school!

Sa huli, we got the taste of triumph. Malaki ang lamang namin and as usual, the MVP's none other than him! I ran out of the bleachers at tinakbo ang pagitan namin. It's picture taking!

Bitbit ko ang camera ko at lalapit na sa kaniya nang may lumapit na babae. She's tall, very slender.

She has fair skin, and their height difference reminded me of how I look so young beside Izo. Kapag sila ang mag katabi, para bang ang ganda pagmasdan. It was natural.

She has long, wavy, jet-black hair. Kung paano siya umakto sa harap ni Izo ay para bang kayang-kaya niya makipagsabayan sa binata. Hindi katulad ko, I always become so nervous around him.

"Juana, sino siya?" I heard Rowena's voice beside me. Hindi ko siya masagot, hindi ko rin kilala ang babae.

Dahan-dahan akong umatras doon at lumayo, hindi ako napansin ni Izo. Marahil dahil maraming tao, o baka nama'y abala lang siya sa usapan nila ng babaeng 'yon. Bumalik ako sa building namin, trying to look all positive, hiding the bitterness in my system.

Sumakto at vacant namin. Bagsak ang balikat ko nang makabalik sa classroom. "Look what the cat dragged in..." I could hear the sarcasm in Mila's voice.

"Ang balita ko, may transferee raw sa 3rd year! The catch? Dating girlfriend ni Izo!" Maarteng sabi niya. Like what she expected, binalingan ko siya ng tingin.

"How do you know?"

"My gosh, Juana! It's all over the campus. 'Tsaka, sabi ng Ate ko na kaibigan ni Alicia, they're EXes before Izo decided to transfer here!" Umiwas ako ng tingin, he never told me that.

Mag EX sila? Ibig sabihin, niligawan ni Izo ang Alicia na 'yon? Um-oo naman siya! Baka nga ay hindi pa kilala iyon nila Senior! How did she even managed to make Izo court her?

I rushed out of the classroom, nawalan na ako ng gana! Pumunta akong clinic at nag-pasulat ng excuse slip sa nurse upang payagan akong umuwi. Ayaw pa niyang maniwala, pero nag pumilit ako!

Talagang masama ang pakiramdam ko.

This cold feeling hasn't stop since I saw Izo and Alicia in the court. Her hands in his arms, their perfect combination... I hate to admit it, but they actually look good together!

Malamang ay parehas sila ng antas sa buhay. I don't mean their social status, but their priorities and goals in life! Dahil mag kaedad lang sila, parehas ang mga hilig nila at mga ginagawa. Thinking about it makes me more bitter, so I decided to distract myself.

Pag labas ng campus ay dumaan ako sa kalapit na bilyaran. Madalas akong ayain nila Stephen dito pero hindi ako sumasama, this is my first time trying it, and also my first time cutting class!

Kabado akong pumasok sa loob. Iba-iba sila rito, may mga kagaya kong naka-uniporme at ang iba ay mga madadalas na laman ng bilyaran na ito.

"Miss, pamilyar ka." Sabi ng acting-manager, or I don't know what to call him! Hindi ko siya pinansin at nag abot ng buong bill, hindi na siya sumabat at tumango. Tinuro niya ang table pool sa pinaka-dulo, sinundan ko iyon at inilapag ang bag ko sa malapit.

I was young when I learned to play this! Marahil ay limot ko na rin ito, but I tried my best. Kinuha ko ang tako at sinubukang ipasok ang stripes.

Alright, bullseye!

Naaliw ako at hindi namalayan ang oras. Pag ka-bukas ko ng cellphone ko ay tinadtad ito ng message ni Izo.

Izo:

Where are you? (Sent 6:25 PM)

6 Missed Calls from Izo

Izo:

Helena, answer my calls! (Sent 6:45 PM)

Shit! It’s exactly 7:00 PM right now, I called him right away because I was too scared, I was past my curfew and my grandparents are probably worried sick!

“Izo..” Silence welcomed me when I saw him at the entrance, eyebrows furrowed, still wearing the jersey he wore at his game. Bitbit niya ang cellphone niyang nag ri-ring dahil tinatawagan ko. Seryoso siya at mabilis ang lakad patungo sa akin.

He swiftly grabbed my bag, and in a blink of an eye, we were outside. Seryoso ang mukha niya at halos mamula sa galit, pawis na pawis ito at halatang pagod na ngunit amoy ko pa rin ang pabango niya.

“What were you thinking, Helena?!” Madiin niyang saad. Hindi ko siya pinansin at inagaw ang bag ko sa kamay niya, I wanted to get out of here! Tuwing titingin ako sa kaniya ay naaalala ko ang itsura nila ni Alicia na mag-kasama.

“I want to go home.”

“Alam mo bang delikado ang ginawa mo? Do you understand how immature that was? I was worried about you! Damn, I was searching every corner of our campus only to find you here, risking your safety for the sake of your tantrums!” I was heavily offended by his words.

“Oo na! Ako na ang immature, delikado ‘yon pero ano bang pakealam mo? You’re not even my boyfriend! Let alone my friend, so leave me alone! Simula nang nilapitan kita, puro kutya lang ang narinig ko! Tiniis ko iyon dahil alam kong totoo naman ang sinasabi nila…” Pumatak ang luha sa mata ko, hell, I hate crying! Especially in front of this man!

“Oo at hindi tama iyon! Pero hindi rin tamang guluhin mo ako! Kung gusto mo man ako o hindi, sana ay sabihin mo agad! Are you only keeping me around because your Father told you so? Huh!” I accused him. Nakita ko na a-alma siya pero sinundan ko iyon agad.

“Well, don’t bother anymore! Hindi na kita guguluhin, you can live your life to the fullest with your EX-Girlfriend! You two are perfect for each other, tutal ay bagay naman kayo!” For some reason, he stopped and stared at me directly.

“Nag seselos ka ba, Juana?”

This is the first time he called me by my first name! Ngunit hindi ako nagulat doon, kundi sa tanong niya. “No way!” He sighed and held my hand.

“I’ll walk you home, it’s late. Mag u-usap tayo sa inyo at kakausapin ko ang Lola mo.” Kinabahan ako roon, what did he say?! Kakausapin niya si Lola? No! He’s nuts!

Sa huli, hindi na ako naka-palag pa at naabutan ko nalang ang sarili sa sala kasama siya. There was an awkward silence. “Good evening, Madame. I apologize for bringing Juana late.” Bahagyang tumaas ang kilay ng matanda.

“Hapon na po nang matapos ang laro namin. Ako po ang nag request kay Juana na manood, humihingi po ako ng paumanhin at hindi ko po inaasahang aabot ng ganitong oras ang liga.” Buong galang na saad ni Izo.

“I’m guessing there’s a reason you’re here, iho. I’ll leave you two for a while. Helena Juana, we’ll talk after you send that boy home.” She strictly said.

Wala na akong magawa, alam kong sermon ang aabutin ko! “It’s your fault for being stubborn.” Hindi ko pinansin ang binata at akmang tatayo na nang paupuin niya akong muli.

“Alicia’s my ex, yes. Pero isang taon na ang nakalipas at mga bata pa kami noon. That was basically puppy love, Ana. I’ve moved on from it, I’m sure that applies for her too.” He started to talk.

“Ana, you need to understand, hm? Bata ka pa. Hindi ito kagaya sa mga palabas na kapag gusto ka ng tao ay liligawan at hahabulin ka agad. In certain cases, love waits, Juana.” He calmly said, slowly reaching for my hand.

“Pero bata rin naman kayo noon! Ikaw na ang nagsabi, ha!” Katwiran ko. He giggled at my remark, what’s funny?!

“Exactly, Juana. We’ve learned our lesson from it, bata pa kami noon at hindi ‘yon nag-tagal because we were immature. That’s why I’m telling you to enjoy your youth. Love can wait, Ana…” Malambing niyang tugon. Tsk, he talks as if he had so much experience!

“Don’t worry, I don’t like Alicia and I don’t have any plans of getting back together with her. Now if you may, please stop acting stubborn.” He added, still smiling gently at me. “Mauuna na ako, ihatid mo ‘ko sa gate niyo..” Asar niya.

Which I still did.

Pag dating namin sa gate, he let go of my hands and smiled at me. “Don’t lock yourself on me, Juana.” Ramdam ko ang halong galit sa tonong ‘yon, para bang napipilitan siya.

“Bata ka pa at… marami ka pang makikilala.” Huminto siya. “Syempre at huwag mo namang abusuhin iyon! Pero mas mabuti na huwag mong ikulong ang sarili mo sa akin. Enjoy your youth, Juana.” Dagdag niya.

“Love doesn’t demand. It’ll come… eventually.” He patted my head then slowly walked out of our gate, his words gave me a mixed feeling.

Para bang natauhan ako ngunit nasaktan din… totoo iyon kaya nakakabawas ng sakit, pero mahirap tanggapin.