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43... Button up his shirt...

CLAIRE.

"You remember when you asked if I ever had a crush on someone?"

When Ryan asked that question, I could already predict what his next words would be and it saddens me. I regretted bringing up Stella's topic.

"Stella is uhmm...how do I put it..." He trailed off and I pray he doesn't complete his sentence, I don't want him saying anything else about her.

The room is now quiet, he's probably not going to utter words relating to Stella anymore. I was about to have an excited mental dance for the die down of Stella's topic when he started to talk.

"She's the first and last girl I ever felt something strong for"

Oh. I flicked my eyelashes downwards. "Do you still have feelings for her?"

'Claire, shut the fuck up! You're hurting yourself!' A voice in my head screamed at me.

I still don't understand why it hurts to know about his relationship with Stella. I mean, he's not my real boyfriend, so I shouldn't feel this way, it doesn't even make any sense.

Ryan raked his hair backwar
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