Four

My heart is wounded, but not broken.

The little dignity I had left was washed away by the mere appearance of a human in my pack.

I stare at my undignified claws and furry elbow. I am doing everything possible not to fully shift. My mind is thrown into chaos. I have isolated myself from the rest of the world. That is if I am considered part of the world so that I wouldn't smell her.

A human, my mate.

The mere thought of her sent my mind into overdrive, my wolf snarling in my head, tapping the mating venom with my paws, the pressing need to mark and mate. Our mate is so furry that my wolf wants to break free, thus the reason for my claws and furry elbow.

I could fight it and I couldn't.

Shame bears me down and I sink to the floor, unshed tears lingering in my eyes.

It was something that Bennett had said, and I am upset that it had come true. Reluctantly, I recall the vile words of the bloody bastard.

"I am not afraid of death you greedy bitch. You don't deserve to be an alpha and our pack. My pack would crumble in your reign. A female alpha breeds a female mate. Let us see if they will still let you on the throne when your infidelities are out in the open."

"Alpha," Bradley's voice is calm, as he lingers by the doorway, for his safety. "What shall we do with her?"

My wolf is ready to mark her, alpha or not. We have waited so long for this, and now that it is here, we can't have it. I on the other hand, thought it right to reject her, but the fear of living with a hole in my heart stopped me from doing so.

Bradley, Lyles, and Leo are the only ones that know for now. But now, I know it will be the talk of the town even before the day is over.

I met his eyes. "What do you want me to do, Bradley?"

The silence is stretched and he tries to find a befitting answer.

"Whatever you think is right, Alpha."

"What is right?" I asked him, wiping my tears away. My being emotional has taken me back to my normal self. "What is right Bradley? What exactly is right? Marking and mating her would be the right thing to do and also wrong. I am torn between taking my mate and pleasing the pack. Tell me, Bradley. What would you do if you were in my shoes?"

"I won't choose my pack over my mate, but you also have to consider the female's choice in this. Judging from the way she touched Lyles earlier; it is obvious she won't agree to have anything to do with you. If you both force her into a bond, it would be one-sided."

I marveled at the wise words emitting from Bradley's mouth. His father had been a rascal, but Bradley was like my personal adviser, free of charge.

I know he is right. My wolf knows he is right, and we both want him to be wrong. Why would the moon goddess do this to me? A female? Why? My mother had been forced into a mate bond with my father and she tried on many occasions to kill me in the womb. When her attempted murder failed, she killed herself, knowing full well the pain it would cause my father.

I wasn't trusted with the responsibilities of alpha, because they believed I would turn out like my mother. I am not crazy as she was, but I still have to keep proving that on a daily basis.

I am not too sure I can keep up doing that now I have found my mate. If that little she-devil learns of our bond, there is no hell telling what she can do. The best thing to do was let her go. Enraged by that thought, my wolf surged forward.

#

"So, it is true then." Joe's voice is a sneer as he eyes me with disgust once I reach the clearing. I ignored him, searching for my mate in the throng. I find her explaining something of unimportance to Leo, who is uninterested. He doesn't know how to pry her off without hurting her. Leo is one of those people whose anger gets the best of them. Although he is trying to remain calm and immobile. I can see the anger simmering under the surface, attempting to break free.

She is all I smell and can see. Reality dawns on me. I can't reject her. I ignore their accusing voices, waving away their degrading words.

I could care less about what they thought of me. They can whisper till the next day comes, but I am still their alpha. I will always be until someone is strong enough to get up and challenge me.

I stood by her side, immersing myself in the warmth emitting from her. Sniffing her would be weird and I don't want to frighten her any more.

"What has happened has happened, and there is nothing anyone can do about it. It is not anyone's fault that she has been given to me, but you will all bring trouble upon yourselves if she isn't treated with respect."

"And the mating?" Someone shouts from behind.

"Cast aside the fact that that hotspot is your mate, but will you mark and mate a human?"

"The pictures are just too many," another groans.

"What I do with my mate is none of your business." I am seething. Why are they so into my business? Mates are a blessing from the goddess and I would be a fool to reject my mate because the pack didn't want her around.

"It is our business! Your decision now, whether good or bad, will affect us in the future. We have a right to know if you will go against set rules for your mate."

When things like this happen, I suddenly wish I wasn't the alpha of this rebellious pack.

Letting her go would be right, but it would also destroy me. The most powerful rulers couldn't function mateless and I felt betrayed by both my pack and the goddess. Why would she curse me with a girl for a mate?

Secretly, I had hoped that a handsome but battered rogue would have been my mate. I would have taken him over this humiliation.

"I won't reject her if that is what you are thinking, but I won't do anything until she and the council are properly informed. Now get out of my sight."

#

"So, I heard that you are the one who owns all this beauty." Sarai, my mate said, eyeing the interior of the packhouse with admiring eyes.

She looks beautiful. Brown hair with matching eyes frame her face and now and then, she is pushing those bangs out of her face. She is curvy in all the right places and, judging from her scent, I know she didn't wait for me, just as I didn't wait for her.

Briefly, I wondered how my life would be if it was okay to mark a human. The pack would disrespect me, of course, but I would still be happy. Wolves would be at my throat, but none of them would matter once she is in my arms.

I didn't say anything, afraid I would say something off-topic. Swallowing hard, I asked, "How did you end up in the woods?"

"A camping trip went wrong. It was worth it anyway. It was better than watching Danny snuggling with some other bitch."

My wolf was annoyed with this Danny, whoever it was, because we believed he had been intimate with her before.

"So, you don't want to go home?"

"My home doesn't have hot males and a cool interior design. Plus, I can't leave until a month or more is gone."

I wasn't happy with her answer. I wanted her gone immediately before I became too attached to her. If there was enough distance between us, I would be able to deal with the heartbreak when it comes.

"Well, you can stay here as long as you want."

#

I regret those words after a few days of torment. Sarai was settling in well much to my liking. Lyles had to leave the pack because of her seduction antics and Leo locked himself up in a cell because she had tried to kiss him. Only a fool would not be attracted to her. They were males and I know it is mostly because she is my mate that they weren't succumbing to her seduction antics.

Bradley, however, wasn't so lucky. Since she was a guest, I had to make sure she was comfortable now and then and since Bradley is my PA, he was subjected to her sweet smiles and revealing clothes.

"Alpha."

Averting my eyes from my mate who was chatting with some she-wolves.

"What is it?"

"A few rogues have been sighted around the pack border."

"Were their stances offensive?"

"Not, but..."

"But nothing. Send more wolves to patrol the border. Watch those rogues for seven more days. If they are still there after a week, butcher them up and leave one for interrogation."

Leo nods, before taking his leave.

#

I wasn't too happy to see Beckett in my living room after the sun decided to leave the sky. He was visibly relaxed on my sofa, sipping the green tea Bradley had served him.

"Congratulations in order Alpha. I can't say they are sincere until I see the heir to Bluestone."

"What do you want, Beckett? What's with you and your nightly visits?"

"I only came to advise you, pup. Nobody would accept a woman as their mate. Sooner or later, there will be a threat to your title."

Fuming inside, but choosing to remain calm, I asked him to continue in the politest way possible.

"Enjoy your mate while it lasts, but don't forget your pack in advance. Get a male, a mateless male, and have him give you a child."

"No."

"The choice is your Alpha. Plus, it is not like you take care of yourself to even think of taking care of another person."

"Get out of my house, Beckett and never come back here again."

He throws a smirk in my direction even before leaving with my mug in hand.

Turning to Bradley, I order, "I don't care how you do it, but it must be done immediately. Get my mate drunk and bring her to me."