I never thought I could ever feel like this, everytime I look at Kristen my heart flutters. Even behind those glasses she's still the most beautiful girl I have ever seen and her green eyes are stunning.
I can't stop looking at her. I want to be near her, so I can touch her and smell her.
Geez, I'm coming off as creepy but then again I have staring at her for the last twenty minutes of gym class so maybe, yes, I am creepy.
Suddenly she catches me looking at her, our eyes meet and like an idiot I continue starring at her. I know I should quickly look away but I just can't.
But Kristen being the angel that she is, smiles at me and even waves at me. Now I feel even more idiotic because I can't seem to wave or even smile back which is crazy because she's one of my best friends. I should be able to act normal around her.
But my feelings for Kristen are anything but normal. If anything, I'm starting to feel lightheaded and a bit nauseous. Well that might have little to do with my feelings for Kristen and more with the fact that I haven't eaten anything in hours.
Suddenly, a ball hits me at the back of my head and it instantly knocks me to the ground. With the combination of the hunger and the blow, I immediately black out.
"Oh my God!" I'm pretty sure that's Max's voice. "What the hell Camila, you are on the same team!"
"There was really no need to hit her that hard." And that's Liam's voice.
I can feel them hovering around me and I'm sure all eyes are on me right at this moment. Great just what I needed.
"I think you killed her."
"Oh please," I hear Camilla say in a less than sympathetic tone. "It was an accident and I didn't hit her that hard, if anything is going to kill her, it's her anorexia."
"Shut the fuck up!" Max snarls at her but knowing Camilla she's probably flipping her hair, not in the least bothered by Max's attitude.
"Miss Genesis, control yourself."
"Maybe we should give her room to breathe." That's probably a good idea and not only because it's coming from the sweetest girl ever but because I really need to get off this floor and recover from my embarrassing moment alone.
"Why don't you give her mouth to mouth Kristen?"
What? Mouth to mouth? With Kristen! That will be like her kissing me, right?
My heart thumbs at the idea of Kristen's lips on my own. It will be our first kiss and I will be unconscious, well partially unconscious. But it still counts!
"Max you are such an idiot!"
"Excuse me?"
"Mouth to mouth is administered when someone almost drowns not when they faint." Camilla the know it all says to Max. "But of course, what do you know besides taking off your clothes and getting infront of a camera?" She continues to taunt my friend.
"You bitch, I will kill you!" Max finally snaps.
Well, I guess that's my cue to put an end to this fainting charade. So much for mine and Kristen's first kiss.
Thanks to Max no one is paying much attention to me right now. Everyone is too busy watching Kristen and Liam hold back her from attacking Camilla. I guess that's far more entertaining than watching an unconscious girl.
I wonder what Mr Montez, the gym teacher, is going to do about all of this. Max is not usually this violent but Camilla always goes out of her way to harass us. For instance, take how she 'accidentally' hit me with the ball. She's just that bitchy but hides it well under her class and intelligence.
"Put a tight leash on your dog, I don't want her coming at me." She doesn't seem the least bit bothered by Max and her threats.
"Okay that's enough!" Mr Montez finally decided to voice his authority. Well, it's about time he does something, this class is a mess. "Miss Sinclair, Miss Genesis, the principal's office."
"Why do I have to go, I didn't ask that savage to attack me." Camilla dares to say.
"Miss Sinclair don't test me, the two of you to the principal's office, now!"
Both Camilla and Max are reluctant to go to the principal's office, each blaming the other for the almost fight that is both of their faults really.
But I'm no longer interested in this fight that is in no way over and I'm sure Max will fill me in on the whole thing later.
So I take advantage of the commotion to finally escape gym class and make my way to the girls bathroom.
Even though I don't agree with Camilla and every other judgemental person who say I'm anorexic, I do know that I have a somewhat eating disorder or in my case, not eating at all.
But I'm not going to die from it because I have it under control thus my fix, the magic pills that consist of most of my diet.
And they live up to their name because after I taking them I feel so much better, I even forget about my constant hunger. Maybe It's because I just made myself believe that taking these drugs will make me better but who cares, they work like magic and that's all I care about.
"Ashley?" I hear Kristen's sweet voice quickly followed by her footsteps. "Ashley are you in here?"
"Umm yes!" I confirm as I quickly put back my pills in my gym pocket. "Just a second." I flush the toilet to pretend like I actually had to use the bathroom.
"You okay?" She asks when I step out.
I nod. "Yeah, I just needed a moment alone."
She flushes. "Oh, I'm sorry but I wanted to check on you after everything that happened, I didn't know you wanted to be alone."
"No no I don't want to be alone!" I blurt out quickly. "I want you here." I say without thinking. "I mean I don't mind that you are here with me." I correct myself quickly but I know I sound like a nervous wreck, I guess the magic pills have no effect when I'm around Kristen.
Fortunately she finds this amusing because she starts giggling and for some reason it makes me smile, even though she's probably laughing at me. "You can be weird sometimes. And I thought I was the weird one of the group."
"No you are definitely not the weird one, that would be Max." Max is definitely way more weirder than the both of us.
"I guess she is. She was just telling me about her plan to get back together with Nicholas."
"Let me guess, it involves hooking up with someone else." I roll my eyes as I say it. I really have no idea how Max comes up with these plans of hers.
"Ironic, isn't it?" Kristen says but she doesn't even know half of it. If only she knew the mysterious guy is non other than Tatiana's twin brother.
"Max is weird like that but we wouldn't have her any other way."
"Indeed we wouldn't." Kristen starts to move closer to me. She raises her hand to my face and I dare not move when her fingers connect with my skin. This has to be the first time she's touched me this intimately.
Her fingers caress my face and my heart starts to beat so fast that I can almost hear it. I want to close my eyes, to lean into her touch and have her touching me like this for a long time.
"You have light bruises." She says softly.
"What?"
"Your face," she says, "I think you bruised yourself when you fell in gym class."
"Oh." Is all I can say. Here I thought we were having an intimate moment but no, she was just analysing a stupid bruise on my face. I feel so stupid.
"She's a piece of work that Camilla."
I have to agree with Kristen, Camilla has always been mean to our so called group but she seems to go out her way to be extra mean to me. I don't know why but she really has it out for me.
I step back from her, needing to create some distance. "She's always been a bully, I do my best to ignore her but Mckayla, Tatiana and Max seem to enjoy sparring with her.
"Well, I guess we have that in common. I don't like confrontations." She says as she smiles at me. I really like it when she smiles.
I would like us to have more than that in common but I will take what I get. Besides today was just the first step, we had a normal conversation and she was so close to me, touching me and I didn't faint or completely humiliate myself.
"Yes, I guess we have that I'm common." I smile back at my best friend.
"Ok, I think it's time to get out of the bathroom now." Kristen holds out her hand to me. "Let's go before they come looking for us."
"Okay." I take her hand and we leave together, hand in hand.
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