12. Summertime Sadness

I just laid there on the soft material of the playpen. I felt empty. The punishment wasn't bad. Although it did hurt. It was mentally more painful. It was the memories that came with it. The trauma that I felt. 

It reminded me of one specific memory, the summer when I was ten years old. All summer I was by myself because my parents and sister were busy with who knows what. I think they even went on vacation when they hired a nanny for me. I didn't even know the difference between them being away or staying at home. 

But all of a sudden my sister wanted to do something with me. I think my parents send her to me. In the hope that I wouldn't lose my social skills and so that my sister and I wouldn't get that estranged from each other. So when needed, my sister and I could get along when there were visitors in the house. 

I was playing in the backyard at the small lake we had for ourselves. I had seen some fish and they looked fun to play