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CHAPTER 39
I could hear my heartbeats beating so loudly and fast. It was like it would not stop from pumping just because what this man asked me. I did not even see that coming!
The cold gentle breeze pass through us, our hairs was pulled aside because of it but that did not stop us from staring at each other. I just want to stare at him the whole time, or even for the lifetime.
I would not get tire appreciating him.
"So, what?" he asked while we were staring to each other. His eyes... His eyes were different right now. It was like begging to get a nice and great answer, and I saw hope in it. That eyes... I would love to stare at it... forever.
I cleared my throat and was about to look away from him when he held my chin and made me look up at him, again. He would not let my eyes spill to another. He was so selfish. He just want me to stare at his eyes this time, but after all, I love how being selfish he was. I want to be trapped by him and be forced to just love hi
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Wretched Self CHAPTER 40
"I heard you were now together?"I nodded at Sew. "Yup, why?"She smiled. "Congratulations to the both of you. I hope you will not get tired loving each other, Astra. I hope the best for you."I felt something warm inside me when I saw how happy she really was for me and Jinx. I could see the happiness in her eyes. The way it shines. But I was shock when I saw the tears forming on it. Why? Why was she going to cry? "Hey, don't cry..""I am sorry, it was just that, I am happy to the both of you. I will support you until the end," she said while wiping her tears on her cheeks. I went near her to wipe her tears. I do not want to see her cry. "It was just a tear of happiness, Astra. Do not react like I was hurt or something."I sighed. "Thank you for the support, Sew. But please, do not cry even just a tear of joy. I felt sorry."She chuckled and shook her head. As usual, we were inside the unit. She has no time to go with us outside to ha
Wretched Self CHAPTER 41
"Wow, what place is this?"I roamed my eyes around while amazement were written all over my face. It was like a palace this time. He brought me here. I did not even know what place is this! There were trees from each sides and a semi-palace house over. It was like their mansion but the differences was it was a small type while Jinx' was very huge. It was beautiful and very nice.Jinx held my hands. "This was the place where mom and I used to go to. Did you like it here?"I nodded my head. "Of course, it was beautiful."He smiled. "Let us go inside?"I walked with him towards the small house. There were only few people around and I wonder how did that happened. This place was too good and nice to not be visited."Why there were only people, Jinx?" I asked him with curiosity."It was limited here."I looked at him accusingly. "You always bring me to the place or park that has limited people. Am I right?"He snorted.
Wretched Self CHAPTER 42
I could feel my nervousness and my heart were beating so fast. I did not know what would happen this night. I just wish that this will be over as soon as I can bear because I might collapse here, in front of Mister Adonis and madame Lucia. Damn it.When Jinx asked me about the dinner, I have no choice but to face them. I had to respect them because they were the parents of Jinx. I should and must respect them. They were a parent and they did not deserve to be escaped from.I stopped my hands from shaking and pretended that I was okay here.I will be fine."So, would you tell me if you really love my son?" Madame Lucia asked while raising her brows. I gulped. Jinx was about to say something when I stopped him.I want him to stop from defending me. I will be better. I want to face a challenges alone, because he will not be always here beside me for a support. No one would stay forever."Astra," Jinx warned me but I just smiled at him. I then t
Wretched Self CHAPTER 43
Just how really the time flies fast for us to notice it.I was smiling to the employees and business man and woman the whole event. I did not even know what my purpose is for attending because I was just silent and following to what Madame Lucia tells me to do."You want to go home now?" Jinx asked and leaned over to whisper. We were just sitting in a round table and looking people around. They look so happy and it will never be the same for me.It was awkward here. I did not even know someone here except Sew and Jinx."Nah, I should finish the event," I said, not looking at him."Alright, just tell me if you might change your mind, hmm?"I just nodded my head. I sipped on my drink and forced a smile at him. We just continued the night. Whenever his mother calls him to introduce himself to a friend, I always get left alone. I just kept on being silent."Hey," someone sat beside me.I smiled when I saw that it was Simon. "Yeah,
Wretched Self CHAPTER 44
"Babe, happy first month of being together!"I was so excited for this day because it was our first month together. We have been together in 31 days. It was not easy because we argue but we were able to fix it as soon as possible. We didn't want anything happen for worse."Happy anniversary," he greeted while we were both tearing up. We both laughed at ourselves and just hugged each other.I buried my face on his chest when he kissed the top of my head. I want to kiss him but I am too young to do that. I only have the guts to kiss his face, not including his lips. I mean, yes, I could, maybe, when I turn 18.I want to laugh at myself. I am too babying myself.I will just wait for me to have another year."I want to kiss you right now," he chuckled and kissed my temple this time. My face heated as he faced me and cupped my face."Why not?"He stared at my eyes and shook his head. "You're still a baby."I laughed and just
Wretched Self CHAPTER 45
Wait, what? You two kissed?!"I almost cover my ears when Sew asked that thing so loud. I just whisper that to her because I was too shy, but then, here she was, screaming triumph but somehow surprised. My cheeks was already getting red and I know, she clearly saw how I blushed."Yes, but please, calm your voice down," I almost plead. She covered her mouth and let out a small laugh. I diverted my gaze off her because I am already shaking.Jinx just brought me home and it was already 3 hours after morning came. I couldn't sleep because his lips seems like stayed with mine. I mean, I still could feel it! Damn that man, he was making me go fucking crazy again.I gulped and stopped myself from touching my lips. If I could only not wash my lips forever."Why did you let him? You said you will just let him kiss you when you turn 18, right? What happened now? You could not resist it?" Sew said while I was not looking at her."What? No! It's my damn
Wretched Self CHAPTER 46
I still could not get what happened.As far as I have known, Madame Lucia hates me. She does not like me for her son. She does not like the way I wear outfits, and she see me as a trash. But then, now was different. The way she looks at me, it has something to do with my euphoria.I smiled in my inner me. I want to scream, I want to hug her, I want to tell nor show to her how happy I am. But maybe, she does not like me do such a thing. I think I am still a disgusting woman she first saw.I could not tell it by just her eyes!I know, eyes cannot lie, but I did not want to give myself false hope because I will just be the one who would be hurt.I should know my place.We went to the backyard of their mansion. I was a bit shy because Jinx did this for me. This is their house and funny how I celebrate my birthday here. It was theirs and it felt very awkward!"Hey, calm down, please?" Jinx looked at me, worries written all over his face.
Wretched Self CHAPTER 47
"I apologize for every bad things I do to you."That was the first thing Madame Lucia let out as we both sat in the bench behind the flowers covering their background. I have been here with months already but funny how I could not memorize the place and how this mansion go flow. This was kind of maze.I looked at her with my pleading eyes. I did not like the thought that she is being sorry. Yes, she did wrong, but I do not need her apologies because I already understands her from the start.I gulped as my chest tightened. "You do not have to...""But I want to, Astra."She sounded so damn serious and I could sense her feeling guilty. I sighed and shook my head. God, this is so awkward and embarrassing at the same time. This is torture for me, fucking damn."Anyway, if you want to, then I will just accept it. It is my pleasure to be thrown with your sorry, but really -"I was cut off because of her sighs. "I want to say sorry because I
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