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2. Familiar and cozy

After a short and a bit of awkward drive, Matt parked his vehicle in front of the overdecorated house, which I used to call my home while I was growing up. On the road, we shared a few stories about our childhood years, and he kept on asking about my life since I finished school.

I explained briefly to him about my boring way of existing and showed my passion for books, talking about my job too much. Not a word about Adrian had rolled out from my mouth. Before I realized it, we had reached our destination.

I did not manage to ask anything about him, busy answering his questions. We said good night and I shyly ran towards the front door. He made me feel like a schoolgirl, unable to flirt back but knowing that a guy was into her…or at least that was what my naughty mind wanted.

Walking in the corridor of my old home, I welcomed the familiar scent of my parent’s house. It was good to feel like you are loved and in a warm, cozy environment. I thought I could stay there for more than just the holidays. After all, I did not know where I belonged after I shared an apartment with Adrian, with whom I had a life-changing fight.

I removed my coat and placed it in the old wardrobe, standing in its place near the front door my whole childhood. On it was the mirror I stared at too often before going to school. I used to admire my young body and long golden hair while preparing for another date with Adrian.

There wasn’t much difference in my appearance now, but I had a tired look and I was too pale for my liking. Only my nose was red from the cold winter night.

Shaking my head to push away the invading memory of the fight with my man a few hours back, I removed my shoes, so I would not wake up my parents with my tapping heels. Moving towards the living room, another reminder of my now probably ex-boyfriend was standing in a frame on the shelf above the TV. The Christmas lights from the tall perfect tree illuminated the walls with blue, green, red, and yellow, reminding me that I should feel happy. It was the holidays.

Sighing, I laid the photo with the face down, not wanting Adrian and silly eighteen-year-old me staring at me every time I was in the room. Looking around in the dim light, coming from the kitchen, I did not expect to see anyone awake, but a small noise from the fridge door startled me. 

My mother had not heard me coming inside, but she wasn’t sleeping either. Of course, Mom would keep her word and will wait for me. I smiled and approached the source of the noise.

She was warming some leftovers in the microwave. The wrinkles in the corners of her eyes seemed deeper and her tar hair had much more white, reminding me of how long I hadn’t seen her. I cleared my throat, leaning in the kitchen entrance.

“Mia!” She exclaimed in a high-pitched voice, trying not to yell from excitement. “I am so happy that you decided to come this year.”

She threw her arms around me, squeezing me to a point where I could barely take a breath in.

“I missed you too, Mom,” I managed a smile, snuggling in her, taking in her warmth and the vanilla scent of her hair.

It was good that some things never change.

The ring of the microwave broke our hug, announcing that the dish was ready.

“Now, I am sure you need to put some warm and yummy food in this skinny body of yours. Come here, sit! Your tea is also ready if you want it.” My mother pushed me on a bar chair and placed some grilled chicken with rice on the counter in front of me.

“Thank you, Mom.” I simply agreed and dived into the food, knowing how tasty it would be. “I missed your chicken too.”

“Oh, Mia! I would cook it every day for you if you like. Just say that you will be here to eat it!” She leaned on the other side of the counter in front of me with her palms supporting her face, staring at me with glowing wet eyes until something changed her emotions. “Oh, God! Mia, did you hurt your hand? Did you break some--”

“Mom, relax! I am fine. Nothing serious. Just a scratch!” I interrupted her panic, moving my hand around with ease to prove to her.

She stared at me, inspecting every inch of my body, unsure if I had some hidden wound or something. I shook my head at her but smiled at how she would always pamper me like I was a little kid.

Changing the mood, I decided to ask her a question that had been bugging me for the last half an hour.

“Mom, is Matt back home now, or I accidentally saw him tonight? I mean, is he living with his parents again?” I bit my lip to try and hide my smirk.

“Oh, Gosh! Is there something wrong with Adrian? Is that why he isn’t here with you?” My mom’s quick brain figured it out.

Looking down, I tugged into the hair on my forehead, unable to hide my frustrated expression. 

“He has better things to do.” I mumbled, looking away, but decided to add, “He has a lot of important work. But I wanted to come and see you and Dad.”

I forced a small smile after my last words, giving the puppy eyes to my Mom. She gaped at me for a moment. Then she narrowed her eyes at me, reflecting my smile.

“I am not sure what is going on, but I will bite. It is too late for hard conversations. I guess you must be tired.” Mom glanced around the kitchen, her mind busy with unspoken thoughts.

I nodded, aware of the fact that she wasn’t looking at me. I would tell her about my fight with Adrian, but not now. First, I had to think it through and explain it all in a way that I wouldn’t look like a bored and masochistic, deprived-of-sex nymphomaniac.

“I placed some fresh sheets on your bed. Eat now, I will stop making you talk.” She said with determination and stared at me like a kid in front of a cake - I could tell she was filled with curiosity and her questions were pushed down in her throat, no matter that I was there with all the answers.

“Tell me about you and Dad. What is new?” I gave her a topic, so she could forget about her thoughts for now.

***

I woke up from heavy footsteps in the corridor. Opening my eyes, I searched my old room, realizing where I was and that a big change was taking place in my life.

Maybe I wasn’t Adrian’s girl anymore. 

The curtains were moved to the corners of the wide window, inviting in the orange light of the sunrise. All the furniture and my belongings were illuminated in a warm color, making me blink to check if I was seeing correctly. It was a beautiful morning in my hometown. I had missed the way the sun peeked behind the green mountains.

I got up and just stood in front of my window. I watched the beginning of a new day, unsure what was I supposed to do. I felt lost without Adrian. And the amazing snowy view from my old bedroom wasn’t changing that.

My routine was intertwined with him, no matter he did not pay much attention to me. I was having breakfast with him, while he drank his coffee, his hazel eyes looking down at his phone. Then we would go to work and I would come home first to cook us dinner. He would barely touch it, announcing he “had some snack because he was staying after work hours and was starving.” After that, he would work some more on his laptop until it is time for sleep.

“Stop it! Don’t be weak! I am sure there are better things ahead in your stupid existence. Someone will love you more than Adrian did.” I rambled with a raspy voice.

I dressed in blue jean pants and a simple red blouse I hadn’t worn since I lived in this house. I loved the way my clothes made me feel. As nothing had changed, and I was a naive and sweet girl with butterflies in her stomach instead of a broken heart.

Walking down the stairs, I stopped when I found myself face-to-face with Matt. He was at the front door, talking with my father. Ignoring the nervousness that my neighbor created, I ran towards my dad and hugged him from behind before he could turn around to see me.

It was childish, but he turned with a loving smile when his “little girl” hung on his neck with a silly grin. He embraced me, and I sank into his chest, feeling safe and secure.

“Mia, I am so happy you decided to visit us.” My father said, and I looked up, but my smile dropped at the way his beard was turning gray.

“He can’t grow old! Nor my mother. They will live forever!” I thought, caressing his beard in a short-lived silence.

“Yeah, M. We are so happy you decided to visit.” Matt played with the words, and there was no need to check to know his wide perfect smile was stretching on his tan face.

“Oh, Mia! Great that you are up.” My Mom saved me from responding to Matt. “What are you all standing there? The pancakes will get cold.”

With a smile, I watched how my mother rushed me and Dad towards the kitchen. She broke our hug, pushing our backs with her palms. I couldn’t help but check the face of the attractive guy on our doorstep, and he was in his usual cheerful mood.

“Are you having fun?” The words slipped from my mouth.

“Oh, yeah! And don’t forget to drink your milk, Mia,” Matt teased.

“And what are you still doing there?” Mother turned to our neighbor with a scold.

“Oh! I am sorry for taking your time, ma’am.” He shrugged and turned to leave, but my mom grabbed the sleeve of his jacket.

“Where do you think you are going, kid? I know your mom is out of town today and no one cooked you some warm breakfast. Hurry now! Go wash your hands and sit on the table!” She pulled him inside and then pushed him the way she did with me and Dad.

We started laughing at how neat and demanding Mother acted when it came to food. I giggled, surprising myself at my reaction. Matt was coming for breakfast and I knew that if I didn’t fight the urge to stare at him, people would notice how his presence affected me.

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