I knew this moment would come.But I swear to heavens, I was not prepared for it. I was not prepared to explain myself. I don't know if the answers I got are the right answers or if they are answers at all.I open my mouth to say something then I quickly shut up, careful with every word I'll say."Honestly, Cedric... I can blame it on a lot of things but they all come down to me. To my selfishness. It was me..."I take a deep breathe and continue."When I eloped to Russia, I did therapy because I couldn't live with what I had done to you. I had nightmares. I drank myself to sleep. Bars were my favorite spots. But therapy kind of helped me deal with what I had done in a positive manner and learn to live with myself."I swallow hard, nostalgic about those pretty dark days of my life. " And through therapy, I learnt some things I didn't know about myself. I had severe anxiety. It's something I had lived with, yet didn't know
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