Chapter 5

Mayari came home from the coffee shop, tears immediately fell down the moment she closed her front door. She looked around the apartment, this is the last thing with her parent’s memories; she grew up here.

On the side of the doorway were the scratches her mom made to monitor their heights, the last scratch was five years ago—before her parents died.  The phonograph that her Dad gave her mom as a birthday present was still there, it looks old now. They use to play their wedding song there and dance in the living room, setting aside their furniture and dance like crazy. That’s weird for her when she was younger but it all made sense now. That’s what love looks like.

Most of the things turned grey covered with dust. She’s been too busy with her life to at least sweep the floor and clean their stuff. She walked towards the couch and lay down, she used to sleep here when she was a kid and everything feels like magic when she wakes up in her bed in the morning. She used to believe that a magical fairy is lifting her to bring her into her bedroom. She’s hoping that those days never end, everything seems easy and peaceful. Waking up with the smell of freshly cooked rice and bacon, running downstairs in her pajamas. Preparing for school, lunchbox days and all she’s scared of is the monsters under her bed.

She’s all grown up now, the monsters under her bed turn out to be just humans. She’s more scared of how unfair the world is.

She’s more worried about how the world will try to bring her down and give her another reason to give up the next day, she wants everything to be as simple as being anxious about the next episode of Spongebob or Phineas and Ferb.

She’s about to lose everything now; including herself.

The dawn came swiftly, she can’t feel any kind of pain right now. She’s not even sleepy. She feels numb, empty, and exhausted. Even breathing is exhausting for her at these times.

Hindi na niya namalayan ang oras.

The sun is slowly waking up, the streets are becoming busier as minutes pass by. She’s too weak to move but she has to.

“I just have to get through this day,” she thought

Walang gana siyang tumayo mula sa sofa at inayos ang mga gamit niya sa kwarto, mamayang gabi ay sisimulan na niyang isa isahin ang mga gamit para sa pag-alis.

Wala siyang pasok ngayon sa school pero meron siyang shift sa publishing house, hindi siya pwedeng maging hindi okay.

Sampung minuto bago mag-alas otso nang umaga ay narating niya ang opisina. Nakabagsak ang kanyang balikat nang pumasok sa lobby, malalim ang mga mata at halatang walang tulog. Ni hindi niya napansin na kasabay niya si Apollo sa elevator. Hindi na lamang umimik ang huli dahil alam niyang hindi ito okay.

Napansin na lamang siya ni Mayari nang bumaba siya sa 5^th floor. Subalit masyadong ubos ang enerhiya niya para magtaka pa kung bakit bumaba si Apollo nang hindi pa naman nila floor.

Nang makarating sa training room ay agad yumuko si Mayari, hindi na niya kayang magpanggap na ayos lang siya. Sa pagkakaalam niya, sa mga pelikula ay unang binubugbog ang bida subalit babangon ito at makakabawi. Mananalo dapat ito sa huli.

Subalit hindi ayon ang pakiramdam niya, iniisip niyang siya ang kontrabida sa sarili niyang storya. Sapagkat mundo ang kalaban niya.

Napabalingkwas siya ng tayo dala ng gulat dahil sa mainit na bagay na dumikit sa kanyang braso, nakita niya si Apollo na nakatayo sa tabi niya hawak ang isang baso ng hot chocolate drink. Inilapag lamang nito ang inumin at bumalik na sa kanyang lamesa.

Kinuha ito ni Mayari at nakita ang isang sticky note na may sulat kamay ni Apollo,

“Dark chocolate contains amino acid that can produce happy cells, it decreases stress. That kind of face is not the kind of face everyone wants to see in the morning, fix it.”

Mayari smiled and mouthed “thank you” to Apollo, the latter just nodded like it’s nothing.

Apollo may look aloof sometimes but he has a good heart, Mayari can see that.

Magaan ang loob niya rito at hindi niya rin alam kung bakit, ang alam niya lamang ay kumakalma siya kapag kausap niya si Apollo. Hindi niya ito balak bigyan ng malisya sapagkat alam niyang itinuturing lamang siya nito bilang isang kaibigan.

“I might’ve found a best friend,” she thought then smiled.

Minutes passed when their team leader, Aaron, walked into the room with an announcement.

“You will have your first project. I want you to cover a story by partner, anyone who can give me the most reliable and accurate information will receive a prize. And I’m telling you guys, that prize is worth it,” nakangiting saad nito.

Hinayaan silang pumili kung sino ang gusto nilang makapartner, isang maliit na babae ang lumapit kay Apollo at sinukbit ang kamay sa braso niya.

“Okay lang ba sa’yo kung ikaw na lang yung partner ko? Iniwan na kasi ako ng mga friends ko,” she said and looked at Apollo with her puppy eyes and pout.

Mayari saw it and laughed at the look on his face. He’s not used to socializing, he’s a dead kid and it’s rare for him to have an admirer like this.

Apollo has a nice face, though. His hair is nicely trimmed and his curls suit his face with the pair of deep-set brown eyes that get along with his thick and long lashes, the kind of eyes you could get lost into. His bushy eyebrows that Mayari wants to pluck most of the time. His lips were perfect, thick and curvy enough to look attractive—

Mayari shook her head, she was staring at Apollo for a while now while the latter’s looking at her with his helpless eyes.

 She approached the two and grab Apollo’s hands.

“Sorry, but he already has a partner,” she said and walks away.

Naglalakad silang dalawa papunta sa pantry habang iniisip kung pa’no nila sisimulan ang project na ibinigay sakanila.

“Real-life story? Hmmm,” pag-iisip ni Mayari habang umiinom sa kanyang yogurt drink

Naka-upo sila malapit sa bintana habang abala naman si Apollo sa pagt-type sa kanyang laptop.

“Hoy, mag-isip ka na anong gagawin natin!” bulyaw niya

“What about aswangs? Serial killers? Wolfs?” Apollo said

“Alam mo ikaw, ang layo sa itsura mo pero napaka-weird ng mga tipo mong bagay,” saad ni Mayari at bahagyang dinuro pa ang binata

“Love story?” muling pag-iisip ni Mayari, napatingin siya kay Apollo na kasalukuyang umiinom ng tubig

“Tama! Ang galing mo Apollo, sumama ka sa’kin mamaya sa bahay,” saad niya at tila naka-isip na ng ideya, nagtatakang tumingin lamang si Apollo subalit hindi sya nakakuha ng sagot mula kay Mayari.

Natapos ang araw nila at agad hinila ni Mayari si Apollo at isinama ito sa kanilang apartment.

“So you brought me here to help you clean?” inis na tanong ni Apollo habang tinitignan ang tila nasalantang bahay ni Mayari

“No… hmm, somehow, but I want you to help me look for a bottle,” saad niya at inilabas ang dalawang kahon

“Dito yung itatapon na, then dito yung ikkeep pa,” utos ni Mayari

Ngumiti lamang si Apollo at isinuot sa ulo niya ang kahon na may nakalagay na “keep”

“Weh, ang corny,” nakangiting sabi ni Mayari at inagaw ang kahon kay Apollo

Nagpatuloy sila sa paghahanap ng bote na sinasabi ni Mayari

“Hanggang kailan ka na lang dito?” tanong ni Apollo

“By the end of the month dapat wala ng tao dito sa buong building,” she said and smiled sadly

“This was my dad’s,” malungkot pang ani nito

“Then? What happened?” Apollo asked

“Wala eh, sinanla na pala ‘to matagal na panahon na. I thought I have something from my parents na I can hold onto,” isang pilit na ngiti ang pinakawalan ni Mayari

“You know why I ended up working sa publishing company?” Apollo asked, Mayari raised her brows and asked Apollo to go on

“That’s my Dad’s company,” isang gulat na tingin ang ibinigay ni Mayari kay Apollo

“No joke?” hindi makapaniwalang tanong nito

“No joke,” sagot ni Apollo

“Oh? Bakit ka pa nagtrabaho? Sa kumpanya pa pala ng Daddy mo?” tanong niya

“Wala eh, I can’t be the best for him,” sagot nito at nagkibit balikat na lamang

Naputol ang pag-uusap ng dalawa nang makita ni Mayari ang hinahanap,

“A letter? In a bottle? Seriously?” di makapaniwalang tanong ni Apollo

“Hindi lang ‘to bastang letter in a bottle ‘no!” pag-irap ni Mayari

“May mahalagang papel ‘tong bote na ‘to sa buhay ko,” pagsisimula ni Mayari sa kanyang kwento “A year ago, I was planning to commit suicide. I never learned how to swim so I decided to do it on the ocean, para matagal bago makita. Para siguradong hindi makaka-survive,” dagdag niya

“Then you saw this bottle?” tanong ni Apollo

“Yeah, I opened it, read it. Ikaw, basahin mo para malaman mo kung bakit mas pinili kong lumaban pa,” nakangiting sabi niya at inabot kay Apollo ang bote

Binuksan ito ng huli at kinuha ang papel na nasa loob nito,

“To my Moon,

I guess I’m a bit too late? I’ve been thinking about it for a while, hindi ko alam, parang may pumipigil sa’kin na puntahan ka. Hanggang sa nagdesisyon ako kahapon nang umaga na tumuloy. Kaso huli na eh. Wala ka na. The only thing I saw in your room was your lifeless body. Hindi ko man lang nasabi sa’yo ‘yong mga bagay na matagal ‘kong pinigilang sabihin. No’ng araw ng kasal ko, hinintay kita. Makasalanan ba ‘ko? Pagsuway ba sa ika-siyam at ika-sampung utos ng Diyos kapag sinabi kong hinintay kitang lumabas nung naghanap ang pari ng tututol sa kasal namin ni Karlos? Marahil oo. Pero hinintay kita. Sa pagkakataong nagkaro’n ako ng lakas ng loob para harapin ka, sana nahintay mo rin ako. Kahit isang minuto, masabi ko lang muli sa’yo na mahal kita. Kahit isang beses pa ulit.

Your constant,

Diana

Hunyo 19, 1995”

Nag-angat ng ulo si Apollo matapos basahin ang sulat

“You understand now? If I chose to end my life that day, wala na siguro ako ngayon, hindi na siguro ako nahihirapan… pero umaasa ‘ko na may Diana sa buhay ko. ‘Yong taong naghihintay lang, na pa’no kung tinakasan ko lahat tapos may naiwan akong Diana? Na baka may mas maganda pang bagay sa labas ng fucked up kong mundo,” naka-ngiting sabi ni Mayari

Hindi na nagsalita si Apollo at niyakap na lang si Mayari, ramdam niya ang bigat ng nararamdaman nito

“Maligaya ‘kong muli sa piling mo,”

Sa di malamang dahilan ay narinig ni Mayari ang boses sa kanyang panaginip.

“Sino ka ba talaga?” tanong ni Mayari sa tinig na nasa isip niya.