Chapter 21: RYDER

She looks good; she looks way better than she did in that hospital bed. And just the simple act of looking at her filled me with more peace and joy than I can remember. It was a bitch being this close and still not being able to approach her, but it was good enough for now. It will have to be.

I watched her from afar and felt a smile in my heart when she threw her head back and laughed at something her friend said. She used to laugh like that with me, better even. Her laugh, like her cheeks, is one of those things I missed about her at night when I was lying alone beneath the stars, fighting to get the drugs out of my system and back to some semblance of humanity.

If it wasn't for her, I'd have given up on the idea, especially in those first few days, which are always the hardest when going through detox. Add the psych shit to the mix, and it has been a different kind of hell. I just keep reminding myself that it's for her because, in all honesty, if it was just for me, I don't think