My Heart Hates Me

My Heart Hates Me

By:  Ryu Sakurada  Completed
Language: English
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"When the first snow hits the ground- Your wish will come true" A little girl from a small, unknown village in Germany, a little boy from the huge city of Tokyo in Japan-- Their marriage was fixed before they were born. They both were tied down to each other when they were two. They are each other's prisoners. A prison they can't escape until death hits them-- They make a paradise of nothing. They have never met each other, they have never seen each other and live in two different worlds. One is too rich, other is too poor. One is restless, other is calm. One is mature, the other is childish. One is sick, and the other is medicine. As days pass, she falls for him just by thinking about him and he hates her more, just by thinking about himself. After 25 years, they meet. He cheats on her, he hates her, he only makes her miserable, he wants her to disappear... Unless she finally does. They can't have each other. "He has to die for her, for her to live for herself" They are wrapped up in someone else's webs and only the first snow can save them from this world where they don't belong. They fight, love, hate, break, they are hurting but they don't know why. All they know is that they are doing everything wrong-- Cause this marriage was never meant to be. But can Fate change when life and death collide and their hearts struggle to meet? Find out in this psychological thriller! "Nobody cares unless you're beautiful... Or dead,"

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65 Chapters
Chapter 1
I'm not gonna start with 'Once upon a time' because this tale is definitely not that old. I don't know if it's a tragedy or a happily ever after-- All I know is... It took me a lot just to be part of this story of me and him. Because I was breathing dreams like air until he came. Everyone has the freedom to fall in love with anyone they want, but things are not the same for everyone. 'Your life partner will be decided even before you're born'...How would you like that? The tale goes like this, Lucus Garnette and Aruto Hiomi were best friends in high school. Aruto Hiomi belonged to a rich Japanese family while Lucus was a farmer's son. At that time, Aruto's family was staying in Berlin, while Lucus went to a Berlin school as there were no schools in Miltenberg at that time. However, Aruto was quite open-minded and did not
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Chapter 2
So many years had passed and now that Vivian was finally 25 years old, the preparations for her marriage commenced. Vivian was taught everything so that she would become the perfect wife that Kirito needed.Three days after Vivian turned 25, the Garnettes received a phone call. Kirito was coming to meet her. It was a Friday morning and the preparations to welcome the Hiomi family were in full bloom. Delia, Vivian's younger sibling, was getting dressed up while Mrs Garnette was cleaning up the living room"Where's Vivian?" She asked Delia."Probably still sleeping," Delia replied as she looked into the mirror while combing her hair."What?!" Mrs Garnette kept the mop aside and rushed upstairs to Vivian's room.It was sweltering like every other German morning. Mrs Garnette was covered with dust and perspired as she walked through the small staircase and opened the door to a cramped room. All the clothes were thrown on the floor and the window was bl
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Chapter 3
 Kirito couldn't hate her. She looked good and she dressed up for him. She learned his language-- He couldn't hate her. Vivian refused to believe it."Verarschen!" Vivian faked a laugh.(Tn// Stop joking around)"I'm serious," Kirito said, coldly."I know that we don't know each other that well, but I want to know you and I'm ready to spend my entire life learning about you," Vivian said. She looked at his hand. There wasn't any ring in his fingers."I see," Kirito smiled and got up "Then, see you at the wedding ceremony,"Vivian smiled.Something wasn't right. She didn't want to do this but her heart didn't listen to her mind. Things went fluently the preceding month. Everyone seemed busy with the preparations. There was just so much to do in the wedding! Finally, it was the wedding day.The ceremony was held in Japan.Vivian was dressed up in a beautiful white, wedding dress. She stood beside Kirito, who w
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Chapter 4
 Vivian slowly opened her eyes and looked at the wall before her, reflecting the light of the sun from the window. At first, she was confused, but then she realised she wasn't home anymore. She remembered what had happened the previous.So, she spent half of her life loving someone who hated her?'Had I known about this before then I'd never fall for you. Because I'd rather be heartless than heartbroken. But look what you did.'She didn't want to move from the sofa but she realised that just laying around won't solve any problem. Maybe if she acts nice, Kirito would eventually fall for her like in those romantic movies. She got up and rubbed her eyes. She stretched her arms and yawned.Kirito had left for office already. The entire room was of the size of her house! At least she got money if not a good man! She decided to explore the house and walked out of the room in her pyjamas. So, it wasn't a hotel but actually the Hiomi family'
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Chapter 5
  At one point, Vivian was drunk. Not the regular kind of drunk but rather a completely intoxicated, out of control beauty, overflowing with self- confidence. A woman so enchanting that she could make diamonds go blind! She decided to make this party into a real party. She cosily slipped into her heels and walked towards the musicians. The musicians were shocked on seeing her approach them. She sat beside them and looked into their music sheets as they played. It made them extremely uncomfortable! Naturally, they were not used to guests during their performance. But Vivian waited till they finished their piece since it was considered quite rude in the musical society, to stop someone in between their piece. "Guys, I have a request," She smiled. They never saw what was coming to them or what they had done to deserve that. The poor souls were only doing what they were paid to do. Kirito was talking to a group of old men and his uncle, the organiser
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Chapter 6
 Kirito was going down, into the depth and looking above. He could see a depressing yellow tint in the water, he couldn't hear anything. He opened his mouth as he decided to clench on the ropes of his brain but there was nothing but water.His head was throbbing-- Ready to explode. He could see a faint memory of his childhood present before him. A near-death drowning experience he had managed to escape was coming to haunt him again. But just like that time, he could see a saviour coming towards him.Though it wasn't a blonde head.The next thing he remembered was coughing his lungs beside the little pool of his. Vivian was sitting beside him, dressed in her undergarments.After he felt more comfortable and was back to his senses, he noticed her attire."What are you wearing?" Kirito looked at her."Mom said I can show you my skin since you're my husband." Vivian winked."Aren't you embarrassed at all?""You don't l
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Chapter 7
Next morning, Kirito and Vivian sat at the dining table. His phone buzzed with Erika's messages.'Kirito, you're late! Why aren't you here yet?!'He looked at his phone and kept it aside while continuing to eat the bowl of noodles. Vivian sat in front of him- gazing at him while he ate and talking to him."Mom wanted me to be your 'perfect' bride. I was taught all household chores, I used to clean our house everyday and cook for everyone-- even from the less or missing ingredients. They didn't want you to complain after we married.But I thought-- you'd love me unconditionally, even if I couldn't do all that. I wouldn't work a day and at that time I thought my mother was stupid. But I am stupid haha. A human should work."He drank the soup and kept the empty bowl aside. He cleaned his mouth with a cloth."I come from a very poor family from a small, remote village in Germany-- so I don't know anything about the way you dress up here
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Chapter 8
 Kirito's phone started ringing and he stretched his arms towards it. Before he could answer the phone, it hung up. It was Vivian's call. He had 15 missed calls by her.He rubbed his eyes and got up from the bed. His head was hurting and he pressed his temples "I think I drank too much at the restaurant. Fuck, I forgot to go home."He turned back and looked at Erika sleeping beside him. Then, he looked at his phone. It was 15 minutes past two in the morning. He got up and started dressing up. He fixed his hair and washed his face. He left Erika's place and ran towards his car. He started the car's engine and drove back home.When he opened the door of the apartment, he noticed that it had not been locked."She hasn't locked the door yet? How irresponsible. Well, as if anyone would come here." He mumbled as he got in and locked the door.He removed his coat while moving into the hall. The lights were still up. He got inside the dining room and
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Chapter 9
Vivian opened her eyes and looked at her arms. Kirito had grabbed her wrist as he stood behind her. She turned back and looked at him. Her hair was safe. He had stopped her on time. He looked at the scissors and took them away."Cutting them?" He asked. She quickly turned back and wiped her tears. He clicked his tongue in irritation "Why are you crying? You look pathetic when you cry-- just stop."She laughed "I look pathetic either way so it doesn't really make any difference."At this point, she had lost something much more important than her life for him. She didn't sacrifice her hair but her self confidence took the toll."The house is a mess, the dishes aren't done yet. Seriously, do real work. Stop wasting time. Also, I forgot a file. Find it for me" He ordered."I'll get it to your office.""Do you think I'll let you enter there? I don't wanna become a piece of mockery. Just find the file-- Do what you're told" She went into the bedro
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Chapter 10
"Jericho, what are you?" Vivian asked."Currently, I'm a makeup artist." He pressed the thread on her eyebrows."No, I mean--" Vivian shouted as he plucked out the hair."I'm dying!" She shouted as tears dropped from her eyes."Is it the first time you're getting your eyebrows done?" He asked but she had lost her sanity due to all the pain."Zero pain tolerance" He smirked."I have a lot of pain tolerance-- I don't need to hear that from you." She said.he gave an evil smile and threw away the thread."Fine then. I'll wax it. We've got two hours till shoot. I should be done by then." He looked into his watch."Wax?" She said as he applied a hot, sticky, yellow fluid on her hands. He gave her a handkerchief."Stuff it in your mouth." He said."Why?""Just do it" She did as told while he pressed a tissue like paper over her hands. "Take deep breaths""I ain't pregnant" She said."Oh honey
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