I mean why did he bring me here, wait, he doesn't want to murder me does he?
Looking around, I notice the small green house, having been placed right at the center, along with benches, pot plants etc.
Wow someone has been busy.
I'm greatly in awe of the view that one is able to see from up here.
" Cool right?" He says while he moves about.
I don't say anything but just look around before I decide to take a seat on the bench, so I can actually take this all in.
" Wow." I say to myself.
" Wow indeed." My head whips to Connor who is now taking a seat next to me.
" How did you -"
" I have my ways." He says confidently.
" We shouldn't be here." I remind him.
" I know."
" Then why come here?" I ask.
" Needed an escape."
Silence.
" And why take me with?"
" Wanted a partner in crime for this." He says it like it is the most obvious thing and I can't help, but not have an easy feeling about this. Either way I decide to brush it off, just this time.
" You really like to risk things." I comment.
" Live life like it's my last, that's my motto, or was, till I came here."
" Venting?"
" Totally," he says. " All they want is easy, that's what I wanted too before they threw me to the dumpster." He bites of the last word.
" Offence." I warn.
" Sorry." I nod.
" Trapped, that's how I feel at this moment."
" Understandable." I nod.
" I was a free wing, always on the move and totally keeping myself busy."
" I don't know about being a free wing." I trail off.
He shifts slightly on the bench so he is facing me.
" You know, there's nothing more that I've mostly wanted then to be confident, be bold enough to do something totally crazy. " I say, facing forward.
After what I just said, he has been quiet for a while that I look at him to see where his mind is at, but all I catch is him staring at me with intense eyes, as if he is deep in thought.
" Have you ever tried just once?"
" What?"
" To do that something crazy?"
" No, not crazy."
" No?"
" No, just deadly."
We remain in silence for a bit, eyes locked and letting the thick air take control.
Being pulled into those eyes, I break the eye contact and face forward, not wanting to know much of his reaction to what I've just told him. I mean by now, he must be thinking that I'm some crazy freak.
I wouldn't blame him if he ran away because I know many would.
" I can relate," he says, pulling me out of my thoughts.
" We may have been in different boats but deadly, I know." He continues.
I'm mentally smiling at how he turns things around, just so that not all lights are on me and to not make me feel too exposed.
"Ha, you know what's funny, how you can really tell that you have someone in your corner when you are hurt." I say absentmindedly.
" What, want to make other rounds to the hospital." He jokes.
" Nope, I've had my fair share of hospital visits to last me a lifetime."
"Hmm." He makes a sound.
" What?"
" Guess I'll have to do a one upper huh?" He scratches lightly on his chin.
" On?"
" Hospital visits." He says with a grin.
A small smile creeps onto my face." You know, not everything has to turn into a challenge."
" Hey, makes life more fun." He smiles at me and I look down to my feet, so he doesn't see the smile that wants to break out on my face.
A moment of silence stretches out between us. " Where's your beanie?" I ask while rising to my feet, looking ahead.
" You noticed?" He asks from behind me.
I spare him a glance over my shoulder with a grin teasing my lips, before I walk away from him.
" Right, the observer." I hear him say to himself.
I take a stroll around, just taking in the cool air and trying to enjoy the view while I can, before I face the consequences .
I sense Connor fall instep with me and I know without a doubt, that he's doing that staring thing again, making it impossible to avoid those eyes at this point. So I turn to face him, being curious of why he is looking at me as if he's searching deep into my soul.
" You look different today," he says, making me frown as I look myself over.
I see nothing different from my usual attire of jeans and a plain white oversized shirt.
Before I can say anything, he beats me to it." This, definetly." He points to my hair.
I lightly touch my hair and I'm reminded that I tied my hair today, I never let it loose like I normally do.
" Um, guess I may have had some form of prediction about today's events." I say, my tone teasing.
He points to my hair again and asks." Can I?"
I nod slowly, not quite sure of what he intends to do. I'm not kept out of the loop for long when he reaches to my hair and takes out the hair tie, releasing my hair and letting my curls to fall around me. Surprisingly he doesn't stop there but starts touching my hair, in a way that's almost like he is fixing it. After a while he pulls back, with a look of approval on his face.
"Much better." He mumbles and I swear that I flush right then and there, so I look down, avoiding eye contact.
I continue avoiding his eyes when I step away from him to stand at the edge so to see clearly, especially the activity happening at the bottom. It doesn't take him long to join me.
" I'm leaving soon."
" You already told me."
" I know."
" Then why say it again ?" This time I pull my eyes away from the yard to Connor's eyes.
" So that you can go in and out of my room as you please and get your feed from your colour." We remain looking at each other, not daring to saying anything.
I suddenly feel something wet on my nose, then my cheek, forehead and it clicks in mind that it is starting to rain. He opens his mouth to say something but I spin on my heel and run away, leaving him to get out of the trance he's in and get back to reality, more like the reality with consequences at the end.
What I mean by consequences at the end, is just that, when both Connor and I have a lot of explaining to do to Vicky, who is now standing in front of my room door, looking anything but thrilled.
Guess I'll be the one at the receiving end today.
Nothing seems to want to come out of my mouth when there's a staring match happening, between the three of us.Thank heavens Vicky is the first one to break the silence. " You have been called by Doctor Anthon." She tells Connor who gives me a sideways glance before he turns on his heel and walks away.Now being left with Vicky, I decide to not fall back into that silence and go inside my room, where she follows behind and I won't be surprised if she questions me of my whereabouts.I throw myself on the bed and stare at the ceiling, letting my body weight to take over. The silence still remains between us and I decide to sit upright on the bed. I see her standing by the door, watching me." New friend?" She finally asks.I shrug, getting up off the bed and walking over to my closet, to search for something to change into. I finally find what I'm looking for, which is a short sleeved grey shirt.I turn to face Vicky ."Is h
My feet are too slow today, it's like they are made of steel or something and I'll explain why I feel this way. All the way from my room, down to the reception area, I have been dragging my feet and it's not by choice but my feet which are like rooted to the ground.It's as if they don't want to move at all while my mom is moving about normally. I watch her talking to doctor Anthon, who's standing by my mom's car with her arms behind her back, giving off a more relaxed and content like expression while she listens to my mom blabber about God knows what.When I said that my feet are too slow I meant it, I'm still standing in the front door, staring at my mom and doctor Anthon.A soft hand touches my shoulder and I already know who it is. I watch the two ladies for a bit, being busy in conversation."You know how bad I am with goodbyes, so I won't say it."" I know." I tell Vicky.
Nothing seems worse then what I had experienced 10 minutes ago. I woke up with me in the emergency room where I was bombarded by people, oh and not just any people, Mom, Vicky, Doctor Anthon and a doctor .I got both a scold and hug from my mom, the doctor telling me of my sugar levels being low and me being dehydrated, oh and that I need to get the necessary foods since my body was still very much small, whatever that meant. Doctor Anthon was just Doctor Anthon, who said a few words apart from Vicky who has not spoken anything.So now it is two hours later and I am sitting on the bed that I was lying on and my mom is just standing by the window, refusing to look at me while we wait for Doctor Anthon to come in." I'm sorry." That's all I manage to say which almost sounds like a whisper.My mom shifts slightly and looks at me. Looking at her now, I see both concern and a bit of hurt deep within. Now
Calm. That's me right about now.I had a fulfilling spiritual therapy and now I'm sitting on a bench outside , enjoying the cool air but of course plans are thrown out the window when I see Connor coming my way.The memory of last night invades my calm thoughts and now regret plays deep within me. Last night shouldn't have happened.I shouldn't have revealed myself so much, having myself exposed and vulnerable and letting him see me so weak. It shouldn't have to be up to him to comfort me and bear my baggage, I just can't do that to him when he too is dealing with his own stuff, I just can't be that selfish.My thoughts soon disappear when I see him standing in front of me and he is smiling at me, not a big smile just a small one." I think I might be in trouble," he says as he takes a seat next to me."Bound to happen." I say and he smirks at me and my lips lift int
It's been 2 days since I last talked to Connor and in all honesty, I feel utterly bored and have been down.I can't blame anyone but me. This is my own doing and now I will have to deal with it.I'm pretty sure that I'll be annoying Vicky soon with how I have been been in these two days. I've withdrawn a little bit and we don't talk as much and that I know greatly, how frustrating it can get for Vicky.I can't lie and say that there isn't that twinge of hurt, when I walk past him or have him avoid me at every chance he gets. It's there and damn it, I can't help but admit to missing him. I still don't get what it is about him that makes trying to put distance between us so hard, I mean we don't exactly know each other but gosh, if I don't miss that boy.Even through my internal battle of trying to suppress any thoughts of him or the fact that I miss him, I can't ignore that I pretty much asked him to stay away from me and to leave me be. I was doing
Nothing seems better than today, being under nice cool weather and having a nice book in hand, to keep me entertained. I'm seated under the same tree that I've sat at, for all these years and just like the last time being here, I feel relaxed and feel like nothing can mess up my mood.I'm all done with my activity and now have nothing better to do but let thoughts of Connor to invade my mind. It's hard not to miss him, even after days have passed, I miss our friendship and just having someone in my corner.Well I may feel all these emotions and fight with my decision of whether to let him back into my life or not, whilst still here at the center. I know that I should do as Vicky had advised and do all I can to actually leave, but leaving seems like my last priority when I think about Connor and our little friendship.Thinking about what I want at the moment, I think back to a time when I'd had those book moments whic
Distracted, that's me.I've been like this for most of the time mom has been here, telling me all about her Mr Perfect.Okay, I love my mom but gosh, the way she has been carrying on about this person makes the idea of meeting him one thing to dread doing. I feel like she's trying way too hard for me to be impressed, which is not the case at the moment.I mean I'm not very fond of the way their relationship seems to moving , its pace proves quite fast and I don't want my mom to get burnt and crash like her past relationships, where I was one left to help her get back onto her feet. In those times I've found myself neither having a choice but to be dragged into watching soppy romantic movies, eat alot of junk food and listen to heartbreaking songs.No, not this time. I can't go through all that again.Placing all concerns aside and actually taking a good look at my mom now, I notice something I haven't seen before, it's diffe
"Okay, it's simple, we introduce each other and go with the basics. It's just a way to get to know more of each other." Conner explains and I just stare at him.Both Connor and I are sitting right outside my door, it's late but I can't sleep. Connor surprised me by rocking up on my doorstep, whining about not being able to sleep too and that he's bored, so as a good friend, I thought I'd keep him company, right outside my door and not in my room." I think we should skip introductions, we are way past that." I suggest.He quirks his brow at me before saying, " I'm tall, good looking and -""And you are bad at this.""How come?"" All I hear from you is about how you look but not about you." I say, making him sigh out, leaning his head back against the wall and closing his eyes."Okay, I'm the last born at home and I dislike the responsibilities that