"Hey, are you ok?" A voice sounds forcing me to open my eyes. "Yeah," I respond with a smile. "Do you want me to get the driver to fetch you some clothes at home? You can stay here as long as you want." She says but I shake my head, and my smile remains. "He's doing better now, I'm gonna call Mickey to come and get us a bit later on." I say and she nods her head in understanding. After I'd been by Ezra's side the whole night while he slept, I'd decided to go back downstairs to watch some tv as I couldn't sleep. I must've dozed off on the couch sometime after. "Alex, I know how difficult this is for you right now." Michaela says and I look at her in a bit of confusion. How could she possibly understand what I'm going through? No one will ever understand and that's the thing. She seems to sense my ranting mind because, "Dating a football player is hard." She ex

"So what about the many ladies sitting at home watching this, is there a lucky lady occupying your heart right now?" The crowd cheers as he blushes before answering, "Not at this moment, no." the crowd somehow manages to scream even louder than before at his response. I'm not really mad because the whole point of us hiding our relationship is so people think he's single. This is not the first time he's giving this kind of interview. It used to hurt until it didn't anymore. So it doesn't surprise me, what surprises me instead is his response after being asked if there's a potential someone. "There might be yeah." That's certainly a new one.  I'm pretty sure he's not talking about me. Is he saying that so people don't hit on him or is it because there really is a potential someone? This is not an answer he's given

My mom was my world. She died a few years ago after losing her battle with Colon cancer. She'd battled it for a few years before it ultimately claimed her. Even though it was expected for the few months leading up to it, it didn't make the pain go away. Not in the slightest. I was broken. I was in middle school and I remember being so heartbroken I felt numb. I didn't go to school for a while but even after returning, I resembled a zombie. I was always in my own world and never let anyone in. I didn't understand how God would let something like that happen to her, happen to me. What did we ever do to deserve so much pain? I hated everything. I hated life. That's when Ezra came along.  The first time I saw him was the first time, after my mom's death that I felt not so horrible. He walked in

I haven't really grasped the repercussions of my actions if I'm being honest. I did something only putting my own feelings in mind, not at all thinking about the people around me. I don't want to even imagine what they would've gone through had I been successful in my attempt.  Dad doesn't talk much, he comes to the ward a few times a week to bring me stuff. I hate hospital food so he always makes sure to bring me my favorite meals as I still lay in the hospital. He kisses me on the forehead and tells me he loves me always. This was never something he did before. Dad is not a very affectionate person so I'd rarely heard him uttering those words to me growing up. But never did I ever doubt he'd felt them for me. Hearing him all of sudden saying the three-worded sentence kind of breaks my heart a little. Because it means he thinks I'd never known it or believed it.&nb

"Surprise!!!" They all shout in unison as I duck in terror. Are they trying to give me a heart attack?  I absolutely hate surprises and I'd been sure to remind Mary this multiple times but clearly I wasn't clear enough. A part of me knew they were going to do this but that doesn't take my shock away. It also doesn't surprise me that Mary went on and did this anyway despite my not wanting her to. She's the same person who promised to not make a big deal of my leaving but went on to buy me a bunch of gifts and gave me a farewell speech this morning. I'd learned that her husband at least had the courtesy of leaving her with a lot of money, despite her not wanting to return to her old life. She says that there's no life for her out there without her husband, that was one of the saddest things I'd ever heard. And it's admittedly been a part of the reason behind my choice to let Ezra go. I certainly don't want to end up t