When Tawny was ready, like I promised, I took her to rehab and dropped her off. "thank you for doing this." she said. I gave her a small smile and decided to joke a little, "it's not a big deal. I just wanted to make sure you really come here you know."She smiled a bit and just looked at me. She looked as if there was something she wanted to say but couldn't. She then shook her head and that's when I knew that she definitely stopped herself from saying what she wanted to say. So I asked," what? "She continued to shake her head no, "umh. Naah, Amora you've already done enough. I can't burden you with me and all my shit.""hey... Besides me joking about bringing you here so I could know you are really here.. I came because I wanted and I wanted you to know that you have support. So I am here, talk to me about anything. It's not a burden at all." She nodded her head a little bit before saying," so... Incase anything happens to me. I want you to know that... "My eyes shot wide open

Moving back to my place wasn't as easy as I thought it would be. It just had so many memories I was terrified of revisiting.I hated it so much but I knew I had to do it. I couldn't live at Paris's place forever.. And I couldn't sell this place either, a lot of good things happened here. So I wasn't going to allow the same memories that made me happy to push me to get rid of my place.I'd literally feel her presence or feel like she'd walk in. Being back there made her death so real. A knock on the door would have me expecting her. The calls we used to have on her night shift. How I'd wake up with food or with her cuddling me. All that made me come to terms with the fact that she wasn't here anymore. She was gone. I sighed and shifted the matras in my bedroom. Like I said, I needed to clean this place. Luna was downstairs helping me. After full two hours I was done in my bedroom and it felt like it was all new. Maybe it was the new bedsheets, curtains and blankets I bought. I smile

I was really shocked when the following day arrived and my name wasn't being smeared on the internet about the incident that happened at Kiddies with Tawny. But then again I guess what she said really got to those people and they didn't post about it. And since the talk in the car, my relationship with Tawny was still okay, she was still herself which was what I loved but she respected me and my decision not to cross any boundaries.In two days though, she was going to be out of rehab and she was going to be back in the real world. That kinda made me happy, she has made such a big progress."hey dude... Have you called my make up artist?" that was Luna freaking out again and I sighed, "just because you ask 4 times it won't change.. Yes I did.. Now stop worrying. You're getting married in 3 days."She smiled, "oh my God what if this is the biggest mistake of my life. We've only known each other for a little less than two years. I can't be very sure about him right now. I can't marry t

Today we would be dating for 3 full years.. It was one and a half year since she passed away.. But it was our anniversary. I stupidly got the reminder from my calender and now I was in my apartment looking for something I didn't know. I felt like I was going to lose my mind had I not found it... whatever it was."hey... Amora." Tawny said behind me and I quickly turned to her, "what are you doing here?" I snapped and she looked at me confused, "you texted me. It didn't make sense so I came here to make sure that you were okay."I turned around, "I'm looking for something okay.. Just... Just please.." I left my sentence short and went to my kitchen and opened and closed every drawer."Mimi..." Tawny said and I turned around to her and yelled, "don't... You don't fucking get to call me that. Not after everything you have put me through. You don't get to call me by a pat name."She looked ate so confused... And then I saw her face soften. She shook her head a bit and walked towards me.W

After the talk I had with Luna I knew I needed to do a deeper introspection on myself so that I could move forward fully like I had been advised.You know life was really hard to get. It's not like I had never been through something like this before. I have lost a loved one before. My parents, but then I guess it was different somehow because I knew with them I couldn't replace them even with any person that wanted to take the parent role in my life, somehow they could never be what my parents were, they could never give birth to me... But when it came to a partner. It was so scary. Letting go of Olivia meant opening up to someone else and being that vulnerable again. It meant forgetting what she and I shared and living with this other human being. The thought of that scared me and it also made me feel uneasy. Liv meant the world to me, and moving on fully felt like saying goodbye forever.But Luna was telling the truth. I needed to admit that she was no more so I could live my life.