Chapter 4

#OnePromiseWp

Chapter 4

"Group tayo ha!" anyaya ni Shaien sa akin.

"Oo naman!" sang-ayon ko.

"Okay. It's says here, may four task tayong gagawin. So, we'll divide ourselves into these three task, and on the fourth task, we'll do it together." Othniel stood as our leader for this activity.

After that lunch, pina-group kami ng pastor for workshop 1 to 2. Itong workshop naman daw na ito would exert effort, intelligence, and strength, and not only that. It would also strengthen the bond of each campers with their friends, teamwork kumbaga.

That was why confident akong hindi ako ganoon makaka-bond dito dahil unang-una palang, Shaien and Othniel were already my protectors. Confident ako dahil nandiyan sila.

Kaya rin wala sa isip kong maghanap ng bagong kaibigan. But if someone introduces himself, in-a-accomodate ko naman. Iyon nga lang, may hiya pa rin.

In-assign ako ni Othniel sa wall climbing—the second task on the list. Shaien was assigned to the first task. She had to guess the riddles in front, tapos ibubulong niya iyon sa akin. Paunahan iyon. Once nakataas na ako, sasabihin ko ang sagot at saka nila ibibigay ang second clue. Running for the third clue was the hardest. Othniel would be waiting for me on the Slide and Fly side. For the third clue, kailangan nilang mag-Slide and Fly, pero may twist. While doing that, they must look around for the third clue. Kapag hindi nila mahanap iyon, paulit-ulit nila iyong gagawin hanggang makuha nila. Lastly, once all three clues were assembled, sasabihin nila iyon sa guy in charge sa mud slide. They had to slide together in the mud slide. Winners were ranked in sequence on who would the first one to find Pastor Stephen. That was the pit stop for the activity.

At first I didn't care much about winning. But my mind immediately changed right after they announced the prize.

"Naomi, galingan mo, ha! That ten thousand cash is waiting for us!" pam-pre-pressure sa akin ni Shaien. "Tulong rin natin 'yon para sa family mo!"

Parang may mainit na kamay na humaplos sa aking puso. That was what friends are for, di ba? They're there for us to rely on in times of need. Kahit gaano pa ka-crooked ang buhay mo, hindi ka nila susukuan. They'll accept you for being you. And with Shaien and Othniel, I felt more blessed than I already am. Wala man akong perpektong pamilya, may mga kaibigan naman akong tumayong parang pamilya.

Ngumisi ako at saka umiling. "Sira ka talaga. Oo na, gagalingan ko."

"Don't worry, ako'ng bahala sa inyo! Medyo kinakabahan nga ako sa naka-assign sa akin." Othniel bit his lower lips.Ginulo niya ang kanyang buhok making him look twice as hot.

I blushed and immediately looked away.

"Tara na, magsisimula na. Pupunta na ako sa lugar na naka-assign sa akin. Good luck, Shaien! Sa iyo rin, Othniel."

Nginitian ko sila bago ako tumakbo sa wall climbing. Pagdating ko roon, agad kong ikinuyom ang kamao ko at inilapit iyon sa aking dibdib.

Shuuucks, ano iyon? I mean, aminado akong crush ko siya, pero hindi naman siguro ganito dapat ang nararamdaman ko.

I slapped my cheeks to wake myself up.

"Get it together, Naomi! hindi ngayon ang tamang oras para pagtuunan 'yan ng pansin."

The workshop started. Natawa pa nga ako habang pinagmamasdan si Shaien na nahihirapang mag-isip. Ang kunot ng noo niya ay lumalim pa lalo habang nag-iisip. Pero hindi rin nagtagal, na-solve niya agad ang case. Pangatlo siya nang makaabot sa akin.

"Naomi, mauna ka sa pagtapos ng task kundi sasabihin ko talagang crush mo si kuya. Okay? 'Wag mo 'kong subukan," pagbabanta niya habang binubulong.

Kinilabutan ako roon sa sinabi niya. Tingnan mo nga 'tong mabait kong kaibigan. Ako pa tuloy ang pine-pressure manalo, e siya itong natagalan. Tss. Agad akong napatingin sa kanya. Tinaasan niya lang ako ng kilay at kinindatan.

"Oo nga pala. Ang sagot sa riddle is world. Go!"

"Huh?" I asked, dumbfounded.

Shaien groaned at itinulak na ako paakyat ng wall.

I did as I was tasked, at dahil sa pagbabanta ni Shaien, I ended up first. It did haunt me—a lot. Kung sinabi ni Shaien iyon, hindi malabong magkakatotoo iyon. Kaya habang maaga, agapan.

She was laughing hysterically right after kong bumaba. Inirapan ko siya at itinakbo na ang layo ng wall climbing area hanggang sa Slide and Fly. Napalunok ako nang pagmasdan ang buong slide. Sa bungad, medyo curled siya, para siguro pag-slide mo, may arte pa ang pagtilapon mo sa pool.

"Othniel!" Nakuha ko ang attention ng mga kalalakihan doon. At mukhang puro lalaki ang mag-s-slide.

Agad namang namula ang pisngi ko nang late ko nang na-realize na wala silang saplot sa itaas!

My mouth watered. Shuuucks! Ang daming pandesal! Sana puwede pa akong magtagal. Bihira lang akong mapaligiran ng masasarap na six-pack pandesal!

"Hoy, Naomi!" Kinalog ako ni Othniel para mabalik sa huwisyo.

"Othniel!" I shook my head to remove all the ungodly images of pandesal in my head.

Focus, Nao!

"Ang clue na ibinigay sa akin is God's love e. What does that mean?"

Tumango si Othniel. Tinalikuran niya na ako at agad siyang nag-slide.

Umalis na rin ako sa lugar at tumakbo na sa pinakahuling task at hinintay na si Othniel doon. Shaien was sheepishly grinning from ear to ear.

"Were you be able to do it?" pang-aasar niyang tanong sa akin.

I winked at her. "Of course!"

Shaien mouthed an O. Inirapan ko na lang siya sa pang-aasar niya. Kapag pinatulan ko pa siya, I'd suffer more with her.

Hindi rin nagtagal, dumating na si Othniel. His disheveled hair is dripping. He had his shirt on, but it was wet. Bakat ang muscles niya dahil doon.

Hinatak niya na kami ni Shaien sa taas ng mudslide at may ibinigkas siyang Bible verse. Tumango ang nagbabantay sa amin at ipinosisyon na namin ang isa't isa sa slide.

I shivered when I felt Othniel's strong arms hovering my stomach.

"Othniel . . . " I softly whispered.

Humigpit pa lalo ang hawak niya sa aking baywang. He leaned his face in my right shoulders. I felt his hard breathing. Kinilabutan ako nang maramdam ang maiinit niyang hininga sa aking leeg. I bit my lips at hindi na lang siya pinansin. Inilagay ko rin ang aking mga braso sa tagiliran ni Shaien at yumakap na rin sa kanya.

Shaien didn't mind my actions. Hindi rin niya siguro napansin ang mga mabilis kong paghinga dahil sa bilis ng tibok ng puso.

I felt my heart screaming with too much joy because of Othniel's moves. Ayoko mang aminin noong una, but I love his every moves. I love how my heart skipped a beat everytime our skin touched. I love welcoming all these foreign feelings with Othniel.

"Othniel, ano yung clue?" I asked.

Othniel tried to look at me despite the closeness of our faces.

"John 3:16. The verse that state God's love for the world."

Tumango ako.

"Memorize mo?"

He chuckled. "What do you think of me, Nao? Kahit naman sino siguro, memorize 'yan! It's the most basic Bible verse!"

Tumawa rin ako sa sinabi niya. Totoo, it was the most basic Bible verse.

"Sshh! Mag-sli-slide na tayo in 3, 2, 1!" singit naman ni Shaien.

Pagka-slide namin sabay-sabay sa mud slide, agad kaming tumakbo papunta kay pastor! We won first prize for it!

"Congrats, you're team number one!" salubong sa amin ni Pastor Stephen.

I jumped in glee! Agad ako napayakap kay Othniel dahil sa sobrang saya. Nagulat naman siya for a moment pero sinagot niya rin naman ang yakap ko.

Agad akong lumayo kay Othniel at niyakap na rin si Shaien para hindi mahalata.

My marupok self smiled in satisfaction. "Smooth cover up, Naomi!" bati ko sa sarili ko.

"How'd you feel during the activity?"

"Tiring," we said in unison.

Tinawanan kami ni Pastor. "Sure you all feel that. Now go wash up. Dahil kayo ang unang natapos, kayo rin unang makakakain ng dinner!"

Tinapik ako ni Shaien para makuha ang atensyon ko.

Tapos na kaming kumain. Curfew na at malapit nang mag-lights off.

"What is it, Shaien?"

"Naomi, wear a coat. We're sneaking out."

Agad akong napaayos ng upo sa kama. "Huh?"

Ngumisi si Shaien. Kapag ngumingisi si Shaien, kinikilabutan ako. Feeling ko talaga, may katumbas na masamang balak ang ngisi niya e.

"C'mon! Mahuhuli pa tayo, o! Othniel's outside already."

Kinuha ko ang pink jacket ko at itinago ang Hello Kitty PJs ko.

Tama siya. Othniel was outside waiting for us. My eyes roamed around his body. Agad namang namula mukha ko nang makita si Othniel na nakapantulog. Kung ano-anong kamundohang kaisipan na naman ang pumapasok sa utak ko. May guitar din siyang dala!

"So, what do you wanna be when you grow up?" Shaien asked habang naglalakad kami sa woods. We brought our flashlights. Besides, safe naman kami. Hindi naman kami lalabas ng premises.

"Kuya wants to be a famous singer. How about you, Naomi?"

"I want to be an interior designer. I was told by my mom, Dad dreamt to be an architect way back. But his dreams were shattered by his family. I want to be an interior designer so I can, at least, make Daddy proud. Sadly, he can't see that."

Tahimik na nakikinig si Othniel.

"That's the spirit! Together, we'll be famous and we'll rule the world!" Shaien chanted.

I laughed with her.

Iniligid ko ang mata ko sa buong kapaligiran. We docked to hide everytime we'd see flashes from the flashlights from heads that roams around.

"Hoy! Hindi ba tayo malalagot? It's way past curfew!" I tried reasoning out with them.

Nagkibit-balikat si Shaien. "At least, experiencing something thrilling like this makes it all worth it."

I groaned. "Othniel!" I looked at him with hope that he would agree with me but I was disappointed.

"You know, for once, my little sis is right, Naomi. Loosen up!"

Umirap na lang ako at inangat ang dalawang kamay na para bang sumusuko na ako sa giyera.

Hindi ko alam kung ilang oras kaming naglakad-lakad o kung nasaan na kami.

"You guys are gonna go over there and face in the north direction, got it?" utos sa amin ni Shaien.

Tumango na lang kami ni Othniel. Naglakad-lakad kami hanggang may nakita kaming kahoy-kahoy na parang bridge!

It wasn't that scary anymore to walk through.

Iniwan kami ni Shaien. She was busy looking for those fireflies. Hindi niya na namalayang palayo na siya nang palayo hanggang nawala na siya.

Huminto ako sa gitna ng bridge. Gusto ko sanang umupo kasi I didn't feel comfortable with Othniel's presence!

"So . . . " Othniel broke the silence.

Tumango ako.

Itinago ni Othniel ang kamay niya sa loob ng kanyang varsity jacket.

"I heard you can write stories?"

Umiling ako. "I'm not sure. I'm only good in the start. Once I got the inspiration, I only do the prologue, followed by chapter one to five, at most ten. However . . . " Kumunot ang noo ko nang may napagtanto sa kanyang sinabi.

Agad akong napatingin sa kanya. "How did you know about that, Othniel?" I inquired.

He didn't look shock when I asked. It irked my curiosity more.

"Here." He pulled out a small pink journal from his pocket.

"Why the hell did you have that?" I gasped at agad ko iyong hinablot sa kanya.

Because of my rash moves, the notebook fell. Mas lalo kong gustong lamunin ng lupa nang bumukas iyon at bumungad sa kanya ang fangirling side ko.

Othniel wasn't able to answer me. Sa bilis ng kilos ko. Hindi na siya nakahabol para i-explain ang sarili niya.

I groaned when I saw a large heart in the middle of the notebook. "Naomi likes Othniel so much" was written inside!

Kung mamalasin ka nga naman, o!

Agad ko iyong pinulot at isinarado. I glared at Othniel. "Nakita mo?" I asked a stupid question.

He looked hesitant to answer me, pero sinagot niya pa rin ako. "No."

Tinaasan ko siya ng kilay. "Totoo ba? You saw it! You're lying," I accused him.

"Huh, ano ba'ng pinagsasasabi mo? Hindi nga! Okay. Maybe?"

Umirap ako. "You're not sure? You saw every word." That wasn't a question. "Othniel, I'm terrified you saw what was written in my journal," pag-aamin ko sa kanya.

Umupo ako sa bridge. Inilabas ko ang aking binti sa mga taling nakapalibot sa bridge at hinayaan iyong nakasabit sa ere. Othniel did the same, too.

Othniel chuckled to ease up the mood. "But you're still young, Naomi. You'll still grow. Your preference might still change, you know."

Of course, I know that, Othniel. Pero, masama na bang umasa at mangarap ngayon? Bata pa kami! Malay natin, kapag lumaki ako, I have more curves. I have a bigger, ideal chest! I'll be more mature and prettier than I was before! Malay natin, by that time he'd fall for me.

"Well, then here it goes. You know what I think? I think that someday, you're gonna fall so hard in love with me, we'll get married, and that's our destiny. Age doesn't matter when it comes to love, Othniel." Inirapan ko siya. "Hindi masamang umasa, Oths."

"I don't believe in that. I only believe in what my heart would tell me to believe."

Tumawa si Othniel. Ginulo niya ang buhok ko at p-in-at niya ang ulo ko na para bang bata.

I pouted. "And now he treats me like a child," pagtatampo kong sabi. "I'm so embarrassed I even said that!"

Mas lalo siyang natawa. "Oh, now you're shy? Want me to leave you alone, then?"

Umamba na siyang tatayo. He even picked up his guitar.

Panic immediately surfaced upon me, making me unconsciously moved.

Agad kong hinawakan ang dulo ng kanyang shirt. Napababa sa akin ang tingin niya at lumipat ito sa kamay kong nakahawak sa kanyang shirt.

"Wa-wa-wait! Wait. Othniel, please stay."

Nagulat siya sa inasal ko. Bumuntonghininga siya bago inilapag ulit ang kanyang gitara sa tabi.

"Why? Afraid of the dark? Afraid of monsters?" he teased.

"I just don't like being alone," I shyly said.

Hindi na nagsalita si Othniel. Tahimik lang siyang tumango at sinamahan na lang ako. He placed some space between us but he sat near me in the middle of the bridge.

It was one quiet night, and yet, I couldn't feel the silence because of my loud heart! Shiiiz!

"Do you make music?" I asked, to start up a topic.

Tumango siya.

"Then, can you play me a song?"

Hinarap niya ako at ngumiti. I blushed once again. Grabe! Nakaka-in love talaga si Othniel! He started strumming a tune. I was unfamiliar with the song, but inside my head, there were lyrics forming that matches the song.

He kept doing that until I unconsciously blurted out the lyrics I'd been thinking.

From the top of the world I will sing

Of the joy that flows from my glorious King

And in my heart Lord I can see

Your loving arms coming down to me

Nagulat si Othniel. Kahit ako nagulat ako sa ginawa ko. Othniel eyes immediately darted at me, his mouth slightly opened, but his eyes was filled with so much warmth in it. He didn't stop strumming.

I slightly smiled too.

By Your blood that washed over me

By Your grace that came down and kissed me

Jesus, You have cleaned my heart and my soul

For Your glory made me, made me beautiful

Pagkatapos kong kumanta, nakatingin pa rin sa akin si Othniel. I smiled at him. He didn't, though. Seryosong-seryoso niya akong tinitingnan. Kumurap-kurap ako.

"Sorry, I made lyrics out of the tune you were strumming."

Lumapit siya sa akin at inilagay ang hibla ng buhok sa aking tainga. He lifted my chin up making me level his gaze, too.

Ilang minuto rin ang lumipas kakatitig namin sa isa't isa, nagulat na lang ako nang biglang makarinig ng putukan.

The fireworks started erupting from the sky. Napaiwas ang tingin ko sa kanya at napatingin ako sa kalangitan. Napabitaw naman siya sa akin. I stared at the night sky with awe habang nagpapalitan ang iba't ibang makikintab na kulay. It was mesmerizing that I couldn't even look away!

I glanced at Othniel. Nakatingin rin siya sa sky.

I scooted closer to Othniel. Habang hindi siya nakatingin, I took the opportunity to build up my courage and kiss him in his cheeks.

"Thank you!" I softly whispered.

Nagulat siya sa ginawa ko at agad siyang napatingin sa akin.

Kumurap-kurap ako at iniwasang makatagpo ang mata niya. Itinoon ko na lang ang buong atensyon ko sa kumikinang na paputok sa kalangitan.

That moment, I felt so happy! Para akong babaeng nakahanap na ng kanyang prince charming! Lumulutang ang pakiramdam ko sa sobrang saya. I kept giggling like a crazy girl since then.

***

"All right, come on, kids. I'll check your attendance baka may naiwanan tayo," sabi ng isang gurong naka-assign sa bus namin.

Magkatabi kami ni Shaien sa upuan. Othniel's on Shaien's side. I've been avoiding Othniel because of what I did last night. Nakakahiya rin iyon, a! Siyempre, rare lang naman akong magka-chance tulad ng ganoon kaya sinulit ko na. I wasn't drunk nor hallucinating. I did it in my own free will. Don't get me wrong, I love it but it was really damn embarrassing.

Pagkarating namin sa babaan sa school, agad akong tumayo at bumaba na roon. Staying wouldn't be helpful anyway.

"Mauna na ako, ha!" paalam ko kay Shaien.

Dahil busy siya sa pag-aayos ng gamit niya, tango lang ang naisagot niya sa akin.

"Naomi!" I heard Othniel's call.

Hinabol niya ako. Hinihingal siya nang hawakan ang palapulsuhan ko.

Napahinto ako sa paglalakad. Hindi ko siya tiningnan sa mata pero ramdam ko ang pag-iingat niya sa kanyang kibot at matalim na tingin.

Agad akong ginapangan ng kaba. That was why I didn't like staying alone with Othniel! Nawawala ako sa tamang pag-iisip e. Baka magtanong siya ng kung ano-ano! Ano naman ang isasagot ko?

"Bakit?" nag-aalinlangan kong sagot sa kanya.

He bit his lower lips and fixed his guitar on his shoulder. Umiling siya kaya mas lalong kumunot ang noo ko sa pagtataka.

"Kuya! Naomi! O, nandito pala kayo!" singit ni Shaien.

Shaien saved the day!

"Nandito na sina Mommy, Kuya! Hinahanap na niya tayo!" Tumango si Othniel kay Shaien.

Parehas nila akong hinarap at nagpaalam bago ako iniwan doon nang mag-isa.

"Bye, Naomi!"

Kinawayan ako nina Shaien bago sila sumakay sa kanilang HiAce.

"Bye!"

I sighed when I was left alone.

Deep down, I know it was wrong to envy someone, but sometimes, I couldn't helped it. The world is a temptation, after all. I couldn't curse God for giving me what I have now, all I could do was be contented of everything and make something out of it. I know, everything have a purpose. But still, nakakainggit pa rin talaga.

Those what if's and sana's were eating me alive. My jealousy is like a disease that can be cured at times but it often come back.

What if binayayaan ako ni God ng pamilya tulad ni Shaien? Ano kaya ang magiging pakiramdam niyon?

Those sana all moments I had, every time someone would experience something. I, too, want to experience but can't.

"No, dapat matutong makontento rin," I always say that to myself. Hindi man ako binigyan ng pamilya o ng kakayahan tulad ng iba, at least, meron pa rin akong Mommy and Daddy. Complete pa rin kumbaga ang pamilya namin kahit hindi perpekto. I might not be fortunate to have what I wanted most of the time, at least, I have the heart of contentment. Hindi ko nararamdaman na may kulang sa buhay ko. Whatever status I have, I never felt lacking, and that is better than having your insecurities and jealousy eat you up.

Maybe those who lost contentment in their life doesn't trust God that much. I mean, if they feel lacking then maybe, God's presence wasn't sufficient for them.

Naglakad ako sa may parking lot hoping kuya Arnie is still there. Sa pagkakatanda ko, may hatid din siya tuwing Linggo. Baka naman puwede akong makisakay.

I usually ride on the bus when going home. I easily blended in with Kuya Arnie, the bus driver and his friends. That was why when he saw me, he immediately understood.

"Where have you been, Naomi?" salubong sa akin ni Kuya Arnie.

"Kuya, sumali po kasi ako sa Gideon camp ng church. Ngayon pa lang po ako uuwi. Puwede po ba akong makisabay?"

Tumango si Kuya Arnie. Ginulo niya ang buhok ko at in-open ang passenger seat ng kanyang school bus.

"Last stop! Good luck, Naomi!"

Tumayo na rin ako sa upuan ko at binati si kuya. "Salamat po! See you next Sunday po, Kuya Arnie!"

Tumango siya at saka kinawayan ako. Pagkababa ko, sinarado niya na ang pinto ng bus at agarang umalis.

Huminga ako nang malalim at hinanda na ang sarili sa dapat asahan sa bahay. For sure, another day na parehas lang. But luckily, camp helped me free my mind. I felt renew and I believed I could put up with my dad's outburst for a year, if possible. I had to do it anyway.

Inangat ko ulit ang aking tingin sa kalangitan. I mentally prayed to God, hoping for some miracle, at least. A miracle to change today from the other days or a miracle that God would change Dad.

A flock of birds chirping passed by. I warmly smiled and closed my eyes for the moment. I let myself embrace the wind that passed through.

Pagpasok ko ng bahay, I was surprised it was dim and quiet. It was unusual for our house to be this dim. Madalas, nauuna si Daddy sa bahay o kaya si Mommy, kaya laking pinagtataka ko kung bakit ang dilim sa bahay.

"Mom? Dad?" I asked. Walang sumagot sa akin.

Naglakad ako palapit sa kusina to check kung may tao, pero wala akong nadatnan. I went out to look for Daddy in his garage and he wasn't there, too! In fact, ang linis ng garage niya. It was as if he hadn't visited it for days.

I'd started to feel disturbed with the house's silence. Something was wrong, ang tahimik ng buong bahay! The lights were off and that was really uncommon, especially in our family.

Tumakbo ako pabalik sa loob ng bahay.

"Mommy? Daddy?" iyon ang paulit ulit kong sambit habang tumatakbo.

Umakyat agad ako sa second floor. Binuksan ko ang bawat kuwarto sa taas habang paulit-ulit tinatawag sina Mommy.

I was worried. Sumisikip na ang dibdib ko because of that. Tears were starting to form in my eyes. Sumasagi ang iba't ibang dahilang ikinatatakot ko noon pa man.

Umiling-iling ako.

"No, hindi ako iiwan nina Mommy. Surely! Hinding-hindi ako iiwan nina Mommy," paulit-ulit kong sinasabi sa aking sarili para hindi ako kabahan.

Daddy might be a monster to us, but I could still feel Dad's love for me. Siguro, iba lang talaga ang way niya para ipakita iyon. Pero ramdam ko talaga kung gaano ako kamahal ni Daddy.

Nalibot ko ang buong second floor at wala talagang tao.

Binuksan ko ang aking kuwarto at tiningnan iyon. It was still the same as how I left it two days ago. Daddy wouldn't clean up my room. Si Mommy, minsan, but I wasn't expecting her to clean it.

Pero ngayon, it bothers me. Normal lang naman talagang hindi linisin ni Mommy ang kuwarto ko. Pero dahil hindi ako mapanatag, ang dami kong hinahanap na butas na puwede kong sisihin kung bakit ang dilim sa bahay at walang tao.

A thing to blame for my own peace of mind.

Umupo ako sa aking kama. I tried to focus my attention on something, or anything that could distract me from my terrible thoughts.

Hours passed and the night was darker. Hinarap ko ang aking orasan sa gilid ng aking kama. It was 10:30 p.m. already at wala pa ring tao.

Ginapangan na ako ng kaba. Namumuo ulit ang mga luha sa aking mata. I tried pacing back and forth, silently pleading to God for any signs of where my parents could be. Hindi ako uunlad kung paulit-ulit lang ang gagawin ko. I wiped my tears away at desididong tumayo.

I went out of the house and knocked on our neighborhood's house. Auntie Carolina and Uncle Randall were Mommy's most trusted friends, especially Auntie Carolina. Siya kasi ang laging nag-aalaga sa akin noong bata pa ako kapag masyadong busy sina Mommy at Daddy sa trabaho. We weren't rich. In fact, our family was struggling financially, but Mommy was positive about it. Dad, on the other hand, changed—a lot.

Our neighbors knew a lot. Mom used to share Auntie Carolina our family problems and Auntie always saves me everytime Dad and Mom would fight. She was like my second mom and uncle was like my second dad. They treated me like their own kid since they were one of the less fortunate couple who couldn't bore a child.

"O, Naomi. Ba't ka nandito?" iyan ang unang bungad sa akin ni Auntie Carol.

She looked shocked to see me.

"Hello po, Auntie. I just want to ask, where are my parents po? No one's in the house po kasi when I got home," magalang kong sabi.

Her expression changed. She looked at me with so much sorrow in her eyes. Kitang-kita ko ang matinding pagpipigil niya para hindi umiyak. Her aura felt different, too. She wasn't the same cheery auntie now. She felt low-spirited.

Lumuhod si Auntie sa aking harapan. Her tears started to fall. First, it was a whimper, until it became a cry for despair.

I gulped. Hindi ako handa kung ano man ang puwedeng ibalita ni Auntie. I was hoping that it wouldn't be something I was scared to hear the most. I trust and believe God wouldn't allow it. He wouldn't hurt me. Kakagaling ko lang sa camp and I was certain I'd strengthen my relationship with God.

May namumuong luha ulit sa gilid ng aking mata at bumilis ang tibok ng puso ko sa halo-halong nararamdaman.

My childish self felt lost.

"Naomi . . . " Pumiyok ang boses ni Auntie Carolina.

Mariin niyang hinawakan ang aking maliit na kamay. Pinisil niya ito nang mariin bago itinapat sa kanyang dibdib.

Her tears were continuously flowing and some were dripping in my arms.

"I'm sorry, Naomi."

My eyebrows furrowed.

Her heavy sobs were making it harder for her to speak clearly. She wasn't helping! Mas lalo kasi akong kinakabahan sa puwedeng niyang sabihin. Bakit ba siya umiiyak? Too much, in fact! Why couldn't she tell me where my parents are? Iyon lang naman ang gusto kong malaman. Bakit parang ang hirap-hirap sabihin?

I didn't believe na iniwan ako ni Mommy. I would never believe that shit because before leaving for camp, Mom reassured me that she loves me. Besides, even though Mommy left, bakit si Daddy, wala rin sa bahay?

So, I'm still hoping . . .

Agad niya akong hinatak para mayakap nang mahigpit. Pinadausdos niya ang kanyang kamay sa aking mahabang buhok. For a moment I felt calm with what she did. But then, agad iyong nagbago nang bigla niyang binulong ang mga salitang nagpabago rin ng buong buhay ko.

"Your mother is gone, Naomi."