SaraI wasn’t sure I felt better after talking to Jaxon. I wasn’t sure anything in my feelings had changed. Lauren had been mostly right about his intentions, and I felt more confident his goal had not been to hurt me or lie to me. But that didn’t change the situation. We still didn’t know for sure if he had unintentionally cheated on me with his ex-wife. The thought sent a wave of sickening rageful disgust through me. I stayed in the house. I stayed in bed next to Jaxon. I followed Lauren’s suggestions. I rolled over to find his side of the bed, empty, but my hand landed on a piece of paper. *Good morning my love. I’m going to the office early to try and get some work done and settle things with Cynthia. I wasn’t sure if you’d want to come in or work from home so I let you sleep. I love You.* Part of me wanted to crumple up the note and throw it in the trash. Part of me wanted to hold it close and read over the last words. He loved me. He loved ME. He chose me. Why did I

SaraI knew I needed to get up. It had been over a week since I’d been in the office but I still couldn’t bring myself to go. I didn’t want to face my coworkers’ judging eyes and constant whispers. I rolled over onto my back and stared at the ceiling. At the very least I should get up and work from home. I kept trying to convince myself to move, but I stayed in bed, staring–making designs out of the swirling paint. My phone buzzed beside me, and I had a knee-jerk reaction to throw it across the room. Instead, I held down the power button and turned it off.I slowly dragged myself out of bed and toward the shower. My mind was racing with different thoughts and ideas. Everything Jayne had said, everything Jaxon had said melded together into a jumbled mess in my brain. I hated to admit that a lot of what Jayne had said was starting to make sense. It’s not that I didn’t want Jaxon’s love and affection, but she was right: he didn’t seem to care much about Cynthia or the baby. His

SaraI glared at Jaxon. I couldn't believe that he would want to take a vacation with everything going on. His behavior was concerning and confusing."What's inappropriate about taking a vacation with my wife?" Jaxon asked coolly, clearly annoyed and surprised by my reaction.I leaned forward and hissed at him. "The baby! You can't act like it doesn't exist.""I'm not acting like it doesn't exist, but this mess shouldn't put our life on hold!" Jaxon snapped with an angry glint in his eyes.I sat back with a frown, feeling a storm of emotions brewing inside me. I picked up my glass and took a big gulp, swallowing it all at once. Maybe Jayne had been right and I was only distracting Jaxon when he should be focused on becoming a father.I couldn't tell if he didn't understand the gravity of becoming a father or if he was just choosing to ignore it in favor of my feelings. At what point was he going to stop sidelining the baby and start planning to be a dad? Admittedly, I wa

SaraI had finally decided to come to work, and I felt sick at the prospect. I stood in the elevator debating just turning around and going home. The thought of having to face everyone, knowing that they knew about this huge change in my life before I did… yeah, not my idea of a fun time.Jaxon had spent a lot of time reassuring me that everything would be fine, but I still didn't trust that to be true. The meeting with his lawyer had made me feel both better and worse about the situation. I was happy to see that Jaxon was taking it seriously, but it had confirmed to me that the situation would be simpler without me involved.My mind had been scrambled ever since, Jayne's words playing in my mind on a loop like a hot summer record. Part of me wanted to hide forever and pretend none of this was happening to me. Unfortunately, hiding had grown old, and I was eager to get back to some semblance of normalcy. If Jaxon did leave me for Cynthia, I would need to still have my job, and

SaraI held tightly to my computer bag and adjusted the strap of my purse on my shoulder. I knew Jaxon was right and I needed to come into the office but I felt awkward and uncomfortable. I could feel everyone staring at me. I walked quickly with my head down to my desk. My face was flush and my eyes were heavy. I put my stuff down and adjusted to the area. I pulled up my more recent projects and stared at the screen. I could feel eyes on me and I started to feel overheated with anxiety. Every time someone walked past me, I couldn’t help but flinch. I knew it was irrational, but I felt panicked that Cynthia would come back. Nothing anyone said made me feel better at this point. Everything just felt uncomfortable and uneasy. I saw Cynthia in everyone’s face, judgment in everyone’s eyes. Jayne’s words still rang loud in my head and there wasn’t anything Jaxon could do to comfort me. This didn’t feel like my place anymore. This didn’t feel like a safe space anymore. I had a hard time