Forbidden Addiction

Like any other high school, once the awkwardness of the new environment and new people is out of the way, people begin forming friendship cliques. I for one, don't know where I belong in this mess because I'm reserved about forming deep friendship bonds. To be honest, I think I'm traumatized by a loss that happened in my life quite recently . Just before I joined high school, one of the closest people in my life, my bestfriend passed away. The loss was devastating and I am not ready to replace her when it has not even been an year.I stick to basic conversations with my desk mate, Tory. She is really kind and funny. She has all these wild stories that make me laugh.We help each other out during classes and she let's me borrow her notes when I day dream about Rie and forget about paying attention in class. Rie seats on the row on my left, a few desks infront of me therefore I can always see her.I love seeing her talk to her deskmate and laugh and I think it's the reason I strategically

This might have simply been the best day of my life. I was in high spirits after supper and Tory mentioned it. After carrying Rie's books, I dropped them at her desk and despite the little voice warning me, I snooped around a bit. Her desk is organized save for a few sticky notes and pens here and there. She has a slightly loopy handwriting that's adorable. I dropped the books on top of her desk when her deskmate came in and pretended to have dropped my pen. Tory has been nagging me all through night preps to tell her what was making me this happy. I was so glad when the teacher on duty insisted on silence and personal studies until bedtime that way I could avoid her questioning glare. When the bell rang to go to the dorm area. I picked my diary and pen and rushed out before Tory could escape her conversation with Olive. Our dormitory area has several buildings which are divided according to school years to avoid incidences of bullying. I was assigned to one of the few dormitories w

I rub my eyes for the tenth time this lesson. I've been struggling to stay awake ever since our chemistry lesson started. I mean, who fixes a chemistry lesson in the afternoon anyway. All I know is they are discussing something about carbon and the textbook before me keeps swimming in and out of my vision.We have an evening assembly before our four O'clock tea which I'm not looking forward to because it entails a school run. I hate any sort of physical activity that involves using too much energy, sweating or panting but I know there's no way to escape this.Apparently the teacher feels the boredom too because he terminates the class prematurely and assigns some exercise to be done before the next class. I lay my head on my desk to take a nap before the four O'clock bell."You should try to sleep more during the night like a normal person,"Tory exclaims as she hooks her hand through mine. We're walking down the stairs, towards the assembly ground. No, we're actually squeezing through

“That was impressive.I didn’t know you could run like that!” Rie says while leaning on Tory’s desk.“Uh..it’s nothing really.” I hank God once again for my skin colour because I am full blown blushing.I can feel my face get really warm and I shyly look inside my desk.“Come on.Don’t downplay it.It was great,the coach actually kept on referring to you throughout the game.I think some girls are jealous of you now.”She says while casually throwing her hand around my shoulders.I think she is very touchy.She gesticulates wildly and always her hands to emphasize her point.I really dislike it when people randomly touch me and often find myself cringing.But her touch feels really safe,I lean into her subtly and wish her arm stays there forever.“What about you?” I blurt out.I immediately realize what I said and pretend to be picking something up which makes her hand roll of my shoulder.“I totally am!That’s why I am buttering you up so you can give me a free training sesh.”She laughs softly.

Rie just walked past me in the hallway.She was with some of her friends so I think she might not have seen me.I tried to make eye contact with her but she walked past without a glance.The thing is,this is not the first time it has happened this week.She has been avoiding me and only says hi when there are people around.I think our almost kiss is the reason for all this.I try not to think too much of it because it might the type of saving grace that I needed.Maybe her avoidance is good for both of us.I walk fast towards the washrooms before the bell rings to mark end of the break.The funny thing is,the washrooms are where everybody converges for gossip during breaks.We stand in queues sometimes waiting since it seems like the whole population needs to use them at that particular time.It’s also one of the reasons I avoid using them at that time but I could not this time because I feel to pressed to wait.I stand around waiting for my turn while internally cringing.“Have you heard abou