POV Millie I get back to the hotel around 5 pm after meeting up with Chase. I was hoping to get things off my mind but it backfired on me. I’m happy for Chase, I’m happy that he and Jessie have been seeing each other but it makes me feel envious at the same time. I couldn’t care less that Chase is seeing someone else, I care that everyone else in the world seems to be having a thriving relationship with someone and then there’s me. I need my girls to get me out of this rut I’m in. Ten minutes later Steph comes walking through the door looking exhausted. “You good?” I ask her. “Hmm? Yeah. I’m great, why?” She asks. “You look like a zombie right now Steph,” I say. “Gee thanks, Mills,” she says rolling her eyes. I laugh, “That’s not what I meant.” “Yeah, yeah.” She says.“The girls should be here any minute, Mia can’t come tonight she’s on a date,” Steph says. “What?! With who?” I ask all excited but feeling sorry for myself at the same time. “I don’t know, some guy from onl

POVJulian I don’t even make it halfway down the hall when I hear things from X’s room breaking. I expected this. I wanted to be the one to tell him because word travels fast in this house, half the house already knows about his overdose but no one is stupid enough to approach him, even if it were words of encouragement. X is a defensive person, he doesn’t want anyone taking pity on him and he doesn’t do well with kind words. X thrives off of the negative, he turns it into a challenge. X’s dad formed him this way, just as mine did but my dad had a percentage more of a heart than X’s. We were taught from adolescence to not let people in, to conceal our feelings and weaknesses, and to hide who we are as a person. In this business, you’re a lethal robot. Millie is breaking X away from that and he’s struggling beyond belief with it. I don’t trust X to have found this information out from someone else, he’s irrational when he’s upset, he doesn’t know how to handle when things are out o

POV Millie It’s now Friday morning and I dread having to go into work today to see Nick. I curl my hair, brushing it out after it’s set. I do my makeup in neutral tones so it doesn’t look like I’m trying to dress up for him today. I walk out of the bedroom ready to go but still have a little time before I have to leave. I make myself a hot coffee. I don’t add anything in, I take a sip of the black coffee. “Yeah, no, not happening..” I say to myself with a scrunched face. I grab the French vanilla coffee creamer out of the fridge, adding more than usual to dissipate the gross plain black coffee I had to force down my throat. “So much better,” I say to myself with a smile. “Are you having a conversation with yourself mills?” Steph asks coming out of her room. I laugh, “maybe…” “Whatcha guys talking about?” She asks with a grin. “Coffee,” I say proudly. “Well can Millie 1, ask Millie 2 to make me a cup while she’s at it?” Steph asks sitting on a barstool. “They say yes,” I sa

POVMillie I step outside of the hotel and right in front is what I’m assuming is Nick's gray car. He rolls down the window, “hey em,” he says with a smile and my nerves are in overdrive. I get in and we lightly converse about our days as we drive for what seems to be only about five minutes when we pull into a restaurant, Blue Lagoon the sign on the building reads. We step out of the car and I’m thankful when we walk in and the atmosphere seems casual. There are sharks and other sea life creatures hanging on the walls. A hostess greets us and then guides us to a table alongside a window that has a view of the ocean. The sun is starting to set giving the sky an orangey hue. The scene brings me back to all of the nights spent with X and the deep conversation we’ve had that made us fall in love in the first place. Sitting here with Nick is feeling off-kilter but I need to make new memories even if it hurts in the process. A waitress walks over to our table introducing herself as As

POVXDamn, this woman is fucking abusive lately. The faster we have our little pointless talk on the beach the faster she’ll leave. I can’t even look at her, she looks fucking beautiful right now, but it’s not for me it’s for whoever she transferred feelings for. I keep my head down following her out of the bedroom where I let all my frustrations out the other night. We walk through the living room where Steph is crying and Julian is consoling her, I hate them right now. They’re moving in together and here I am alone as always and always will be. Millie ignores the couple on the couch, as do I as I follow her out of the penthouse. We take the stairs rather than the elevator and If I just play by the rules it’ll all be over fast enough. We make it outside and I can smell the smoke from my balcony from out here. Luckily I didn’t lose my joint, after I stood up from my comfortable spot on my chair, I placed the joint behind my ear. I’m gonna need this shit before, during and afte