Kabanata 1.1 - Madame Sage

"MAGPAPAHANDA na ba 'ko ng red carpet para sa pag-uwi mo?" malokong sambit nito mula sa kabilang linya.

Napairap ako dahil sa sinabi niya, someone's calling me from behind but I didn't dare face whoever that person is. It is still my break time, did they forgot it?

"Fuck you, Rio!" tugon ko rito.

I heard him chuckled on the other line, kahit kailan talaga, nakakairita pa rin ang tawa niya.

"Madame Sage, the boss is waiting for you," wika ng isang babaeng hindi ko matandaan ang pangalan.

It's been five years since I went here and I've been working for this company for three years already. It is actually four if the internship is included. But I still don't know who I'm working with, I only remember those important people but in this woman's case who dared to ruin my break time, I didn't give a shit about her name.

And the fuck is that madame? I don't want to be called that way. It gives me unfamiliar feeling.

I raised my hand as a sign of respond.

"I hate fucking myself, Treia. There's no thrill," seryosong tugon nito.

Kahit kailan, napaka-baboy talaga niya! Walang pinipiling oras o lugar..

"You know how much I hate you right? Please don't add fuel on my anger towards you, you might burn to hell," saad ko.

Hindi siya nagsalita, bagkus ay tumawa lang siya nang tumawa. I hate the guts of this guy ever since. Mabuti at natagalan ko 'to ng five fucking years! I can't imagine myself being with him even just a year but gladly, we've been with each other for the past five years. He's the only one I have here after all.

"Prepare my condo, and I don't want anyone to know that I'll be going home. Tonight's the flight, got it?"

Hindi ko na hinintay ang sasabihin nito, I immediately hang up the call and faced the woman who ruined my break time.

"Hey woman, tell Mr. Bentley I'll be there in a few minutes," I told her.

"Yes, madame. And my name's Julia, I've been working here for—" oh, please. I don't give a damn.

"Yeah, whatever," I cut her off.

Dumeretso na 'ko sa mesa ko para kunin ang resignation letter na kanina ko lang ginawa. I know this company wouldn't let a precious gem go, they can't afford to lose someone as important as me so I've prepared myself for this. I've been thinking about it for the past months, I'm hesitating at first but Almario's opinion made me do this.

"I think I know why you wanna talk to me, have a sit Miss Fabregar," aniya at itinuro pa ang upuan sa harap para makaupo ako.

Mr. Bentley is the owner of this company I'm working with. Nag-aaral palang ako, nililigawan na 'ko ng company na 'to kaya sakanila ko rin naisipang mag-internship at mag-trabaho. Hindi na rin kasi ako lugi, they have the number one spot on the highest rating television station in Hollywood and almost all the big names in Hollywood is working under them. I'm grateful that I became the very first Filipino who worked for this company as a director.

I've done almost ten films with them and all of it are highest rating and top grossing film around the globe. I've been awarded because of that. I have lots of awards actually. Finally, nag-bunga rin lahat ng pagod ko.

I put the resignation letter on his table, agad niya naman itong kinuha at binasa. Kita ang pagkadismaya sa mukha nito ngunit alam niya sa sarili n'yang wala na s'yang magagawa sa desisyon ko. I signed a contract with them for three years and today's my three years here.

He sighed.

"Are you really sure you want this?" aniya. Akala siguro magbabago pa ang desisyon ko.

Sorry to burst your bubble, Mr. Bentley, but I'm hundred percent sure of my decision.

"Yes, Sir. I want to go back to my country and start to create a name there. I've been into a spotlight for the past three years of being here in your company and I can say that I enjoyed it a lot and I'm very thankful for that, Sir. I hope you understand my decision," sambit ko rito.

Again, he sighed.

"You know I will understand you no matter what. Goodluck on your journey, Sage. I'm rooting for you, our director." Ibinaba nito ang resignation letter at nilagay 'yon sa gilid, "Too bad you didn't get the chance to work with my son, he's been a pain in the ass to me.." he chuckled.

Tumayo ito kaya tumayo na rin ako, he lend his hand and we did shakehands before I finally left his office. Minadali ko na ang pagliligpit sa mga gamit ko dahil ayokong maging emotional ang pag-alis ko. Minabuti ko rin na ang boss at ibang kakilala lang ang makakaalam. Boss is so sweet kaya sobrang mahal siya ng mga empleyado niya.

"If ever you want to come back, we will still accept you with open arms," aniya nang magtungo akong muli sa office niya para magpaalam.

Some of my closest colleagues are here also and they're being emotional right now. This is what I hate the most when I'm leaving.

I'm not good at saying goodbye so I preferred not telling them. Para sa akin kasi, mas masakit yung magpapaalam ka pa. I've been there, I've done that. And it pains me, it haunts me every fucking day.

I shouldn't leave him because seeing him that night, so miserable and hopeless, breaks my heart. The memories of him letting me go is haunting me every single day and it fucking hurts! Sa sobrang sakit, tingin ko'y namanhid na 'ko.

The pain isn't bearable but I manage to bear with it.

"It's a great opportunity working with you, guys. I'll treasure every thing I learned here. 'Til our paths crossed again?" I chuckled.

I hugged them one by one and when it's my boss' turn, I saw a hint of sadness on his face. He became a father to me here, he's my coach, my teacher, the one who trained me to be this great person I am today.

"I can't wait to watch your films, I would love that for sure," he whispered before finally letting me go.

This place will always have a big part in my heart. This is where I realize that the only one you have is yourself, either you'll let yourself get destroyed or you'll fight for it endlessly. Alone.

Later that day, I fly back home.

Natanaw ko agad si Almario na naglalakad na rin ngayon patungo sa'kin. I let him bring my luggage. I took off my shades and faced him.

"Welcome back sa Pinas, Treia buddy. It's good to be back, isn't it?" malokong sambit nito.

It's not good to be back.

This place reminded me of the problems I've decided to ignore instead of facing it. I run as fast as I could just to forget it but I guess, we will all bounce back to where we should be even if you're million miles away from it. Either it will chase you or it will find a way to bring you back. Hide wherever you want, it will still find you.

"Whatever, where's your car? I'm tired, send me home," bored kong tugon rito at nagsimula nang mag-lakad palabas.

He guided me as we walked our way to his car. I went in immediately when he opened it. Good thing he's not being nosy tonight. Siguro dahil alam n'yang pagod talaga ako.

"Mabuti pinakawalan ka ng company niyo." Panimula nito at nag-umpisa nang mag drive.

Itinungkod ko ang siko sa bintana at ipinatong ang ulo sa kamay, bahagyang hinihilot ito dahil medyo sumasakit ang ulo ko ngayon. Siguro dahil sa pagod.

"My reasons are understandable, wala rin naman akong problema, tapos na ang kontrata ko," tugon ko.

Hindi na siya nag-tanong at hinayaan nalang akong matulog muna sandali na s'yang ginawa ko.

Nagising ako dahil sa mahinang tapik, ilang oras ba 'ko nakatulog? Parang wala pa yatang isang oras yon, hindi ko alam dahil sa sobrang pagod.

Idinilat ko ang mga mata at inilibot ang paningin. Pamilyar sa'kin ang lugar na ito, hindi ako pwedeng magkamali. Napakunot nang bahagya ang noo ko at matalim na binalingan si Rio. I know what he's up to.